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Tournament: PLΔTINUM HIT • season six
Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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Quote:
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This gives me Katy Perry lyrics teas, but I mean she stays perched in my iTunes so I guess that's a good thing.
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It betta be a good thing since y'all been grinding my **** about making my lyrics more accessible lately. dd I'm literally having a meltdown rn but it's 3AM and idc anymore!!! 
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 37,384
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Euphorae, sis, in the first stanza alone every line has a different number of syllables 
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 31,895
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Upside Down - #9
Yin + Yang - #9
Sands of Time - #3
Monte Carlo - #3
Free - #2
Iridescence - #5
Cherry Asphyxiation - #4
Glass Dreams - TBA
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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GotSkill I know my chorus structure is weird, but the melody honestly slays. If I could sing it I would. The last part has 18 syllables because it's supposed to be sung kinda fast and all together, it's a bit Kesha like, kinda hard to describe. But it works and the rhyme fits I assure you 
But the lyrics are so basic and generic it's laughable I agree
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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Quote:
Originally posted by GotSkill
Euphorae, sis, in the first stanza alone every line has a different number of syllables |
Omgggggg I had no idea we were supposed to be writing monotonous **** like THE FREAKING **** omg like wait let me google some Katy Perry lyrics ugh yeah you're right but you know what I mean like it still has a nice flow 
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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 2 U EuphorianForget You Got A Girlfriend
[VERSE 1]
I see you checking me out
Boy don't you try to deny it
Not sure what that's all about
But I'm not about to fight it
[VERSE 2]
I wanna get you alone
And won't take no for an answer
Don't need you to take me home
Just take me now, dirty dancer
[PRE-CHORUS]
There's just one problem, lingering on your mind
You've got a girlfriend, but where is she tonight?
No point in waiting for the stars to align
So let's just do it baby, cause we've only got the night
[CHORUS]
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight
[VERSE 3]
You get a text from your girl
Asking if you will be home soon
But she doesn't even know
We're making out in the bathroom
[VERSE 4]
Now you've got like ten missed calls
Because your phone is on silent
You push me against the wall
I love it when it gets violent
[PRE-CHORUS]
There's just one problem, lingering on your mind
You've got a girlfriend, but where is she tonight?
No point in waiting for the stars to align
So let's just do it baby, cause we've only got the night
[CHORUS]
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight
[BRIDGE]
And there's no need to think, just have another drink
We can find a place to do it in the stall or on the sink
No need to lock the door, just give a little more
Because soon enough we'll be back to grinding on the dance floor
[CHORUS]
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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I find myself by myself (7)
Disappearing into the stardust (9)
Hidden away, I feel ashamed (8)
To take that leap of faith (6)
Bitch bye, you're reading it wrong!
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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Quote:
Originally posted by Sam Jay
2 U Euphorian
Forget You Got A Girlfriend
[VERSE 1]
I see you checking me out
Boy don't you try to deny it
Not sure what that's all about
But I'm not about to fight it
[VERSE 2]
I wanna get you alone
And won't take no for an answer
Don't need you to take me home
Just take me now, dirty dancer
[PRE-CHORUS]
There's just one problem, lingering on your mind
You've got a girlfriend, but where is she tonight?
No point in waiting for the stars to align
So let's just do it baby, cause we've only got the night
[CHORUS]
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight
[VERSE 3]
You get a text from your girl
Asking if you will be home soon
But she doesn't even know
We're making out in the bathroom
[VERSE 4]
Now you've got like ten missed calls
Because your phone is on silent
You push me against the wall
I love it when it gets violent
[PRE-CHORUS]
There's just one problem, lingering on your mind
You've got a girlfriend, but where is she tonight?
No point in waiting for the stars to align
So let's just do it baby, cause we've only got the night
[CHORUS]
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight
[BRIDGE]
And there's no need to think, just have another drink
We can find a place to do it in the stall or on the sink
No need to lock the door, just give a little more
Because soon enough we'll be back to grinding on the dance floor
[CHORUS]
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight |
Mine flows better than yours 
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 37,384
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Quote:
Originally posted by EuphorianSea
I find myself by myself (7)
Disappearing into the stardust (9)
Hidden away, I feel ashamed (8)
To take that leap of faith (6)
Bitch bye, you're reading it wrong! |
That's exactly what I'm saying though. A song doesn't flow when it's like that, it's like reading a free verse poem.
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Member Since: 1/2/2014
Posts: 2,955
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For anyone that was interested
Talk To Me
(Verse 1)
When you come home, with tears in your eyes
How they’ve hurt you, to you it’s no surprise
But know I love you, and will hold you all night
Talk to me, take it off your chest
(Verse 2)
When you start to hate, those that ruin your life
How they break you, and steal all of your light
Blow after blow, you dread the next day
So talk to me, and get it off your chest
(Pre Chorus)
When I see you fight for the will to live
And I see you cry ‘cuz you’re losing it
I wanna hold you tight, wanna make it okay
When you talk to me you’ll feel a little better
Never bottle up how you feel, no never
I’m happy to carry, your burden my shoulders
(Chorus)
If the pain is the prison, then I can be your key
All you gotta do to get out, is come and talk to me
And once you let it all out, baby you can be free
I’ll do anything to help you, so come talk to me
(So come talk to me)
(Verse 3)
I completely understand, why you hesitate
They’ve managed to get you into, this terrified state
But know that I’ll part seas, to free you from it all
Because when you stumble, baby I fall
(Verse 4)
You know I wish that I, could be your shield
Keep you safe, and make sure you don’t feel
Anything that can hurt you, but for real
The best thing I could do, is get you to talk to me
(Pre Chorus)
When I see you break down and giving up
When you’re on the ground and you can’t get up
I totally get it, maybe I’ll lie down with you
You and I we can stay and talk all night
Don’t mind listening ‘till we see the sunlight
‘Cuz I think it’s just what you need
(Chorus)
If the pain is the prison, then I can be your key
All you gotta do to get out, is come and talk to me
And once you let it all out, baby you can be free
I’ll do anything to help you, so come talk to me
(So come talk to me)
(Bridge)
There’s nothing that you can do to turn me away for you, no, no
There’s nothing you can say to make me lose faith in you, no, no
So baby don’t be ashamed come and say what you need to
I’m always on your side no matter what you do
So come, so come, so come, and talk to me
So come, so come, so come, and talk to me
(Chorus)
If the pain is the prison, then I can be your key
All you gotta do to get out, is come and talk to me
And once you let it all out, baby you can be free
I’ll do anything to help you, so come talk to me
Some come talk to me
I’ll do anything to help you, so come talk to me
Some come talk to me
I’ll do anything to help you, so come talk to me
Some come talk to me
I’ll do anything to help you, so come talk to me oh baby
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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I.find myyself. BY. myyy. SELF.
Disapurin inTO tha starr. DUST.
Hi den ah wa
I feer AHshame
To. take. that. LEAP. o faaiith
There's no other way I can explain it
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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Quote:
Originally posted by GotSkill
That's exactly what I'm saying though. A song doesn't flow when it's like that, it's like reading a free verse poem.
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I apologise if I sound ignorant but it still bops in my head 
Innovative, perhaps?
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 31,895
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I haven't posted any of my lyrics in the thread I just realized
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 13,381
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Quote:
Originally posted by Sam Jay
2 U Euphorian
Forget You Got A Girlfriend
[VERSE 1]
I see you checking me out
Boy don't you try to deny it
Not sure what that's all about
But I'm not about to fight it
[VERSE 2]
I wanna get you alone
And won't take no for an answer
Don't need you to take me home
Just take me now, dirty dancer
[PRE-CHORUS]
There's just one problem, lingering on your mind
You've got a girlfriend, but where is she tonight?
No point in waiting for the stars to align
So let's just do it baby, cause we've only got the night
[CHORUS]
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight
[VERSE 3]
You get a text from your girl
Asking if you will be home soon
But she doesn't even know
We're making out in the bathroom
[VERSE 4]
Now you've got like ten missed calls
Because your phone is on silent
You push me against the wall
I love it when it gets violent
[PRE-CHORUS]
There's just one problem, lingering on your mind
You've got a girlfriend, but where is she tonight?
No point in waiting for the stars to align
So let's just do it baby, cause we've only got the night
[CHORUS]
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight
[BRIDGE]
And there's no need to think, just have another drink
We can find a place to do it in the stall or on the sink
No need to lock the door, just give a little more
Because soon enough we'll be back to grinding on the dance floor
[CHORUS]
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight
It's now or never, baby I won't ever
Tell nobody what we'll do tonight
Yeah it's do or die, and baby now's the time
That you're gonna rock my body right
Let's sneak away from the crowd, c'mon baby with me now
Gonna make it the night of your life
Just don't think about how I made you forget you got a girlfriend tonight |
What kind of amazing BOP? 
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Member Since: 9/15/2012
Posts: 22,487
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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My song does NOT sound like this
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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Not me thinking all week YASSS THE JUDGES ARE FINALLY GONNA SEE THAT I CAN EXECUTE MY FLOW-FREE SONG ABOUT PERSONAL EXPERIENCES WITH A CLEAN STRUCTURE AND SOME LYRICS THAT MAKE SENSE when I apparently did the exact opposite of that 
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Member Since: 1/2/2014
Posts: 2,955
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Quote:
Originally posted by EuphorianSea
Not me thinking all week YASSS THE JUDGES ARE FINALLY GONNA SEE THAT I CAN EXECUTE MY FLOW-FREE SONG ABOUT PERSONAL EXPERIENCES WITH A CLEAN STRUCTURE AND SOME LYRICS THAT MAKE SENSE when I apparently did the exact opposite of that |
I know! I'm really not trying to shade the judges at all with this.
What I'm saying is that it's hard to have an online lyric competition, we can't go and sing it for the judges which means that we can have an amazing tune in our heads and thinking we have an amazing song, but it doesn't translate that way when they read it off a laptop screen. All we can do is present the best songs we can and hopefully impress them. Another thing is that we all have individual styles which the judges may or may not like. I have a very to the point, precise style which doesn't fluff around much, and most of the time the judges don't appreciate this, it's just that I don't know how to write any other way. A lot of personal preference comes into this, it's not necessarily a bad thing. What's hard most of the time is that the way we see our songs is not often the same way the judges see the songs and there's nothing we can do about it, unless we provide a description or meaning prior to the song, but then if we explain something, we aren't "letting the song stand for itself", it's difficult to choose a side ahah, explain (and the judges don't read it) and get dragged, or get dragged for not letting the song stand for itself, or don't explain and get dragged because the song doesn't have meaning.
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Member Since: 8/31/2013
Posts: 21,462
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Ho, I love the story of Icarus and clearly understood the concept. I'm talking about the word choice MELTING, not the fact that the wings deteriorate.
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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Quote:
Originally posted by EuphorianSea
Mine flows better than yours |
sis mine follows a very simple 7-8-7-8 structure in each verse
But I get what you mean about having a rhythm where the syllables don't necessarily align
Quote:
Originally posted by MattyTacos
What kind of amazing BOP? |
Oh thank you!
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