The title says it all. What are some shady things that your pets do?

Post them here.

My bitch humps the sofa pillows when she thinks no one's watching.

I went outside yesterday and both my dogs were just staring at me with an empty look in their face. Then I looked next to them and their was a dead squirrel. I'm worried about them.

Oh yeah and my female dog always humps my male dog.

The dog jumps on the table and sneaks food when I forget to push my chair in.
She thinks she's sneaky but I caught her a few times.

And the dog goes In the trash can too.

My cat always goes in my closet. I had to move all my clothes so they wouldn't get hair on them

The worst they can do is poop on the floor in the hallway.

My dog put his butt full of poop on my feet. Thank god I had socks on

My dogs turns off the stereo when I'm playing music

Who do you listen to?

My dogs are boring, the worst they do is steal food off the table occasionally.

Hump the stuffed animals when nobody's looking.

One time I caught her and she froze mid-hump, slowly lifted her leg to dismount, then walked away like nothing happened.

my cat literally pees in my sitting spot on the couch all the time.

i literally got so mad at her i spanked her once.

My cat puts her paw over my mouth whenever I sing.

My pet goat rams me after I gave the bitch a full bowl of food. Whilst her horns are fierce, they're dangerous.

They would save food before they save you.

My cat will lay down right in the middle of my bed so I have to scrunch up on one side when I go to sleep and if I try to move her she digs her claws into the mattress refusing to get up and makes it all overdramatic like just move to the side of the bed rather then hogging the spot where I actually lay. god

My cat is sneaky ass ****, she'll hide in a corner and jump out right at the last moment and make me trip all over her.

I nearly stepped on her once, and the other time I spilled my drink all over the floor.

She also rolls on her back for me to rub her stomach, and after like 15 seconds of letting you pet it, she bites into you and scratches the **** out of you with her back claws like you just stabbed her with a knife

My cat will sneak the hell UP on you if you're making food. I've lost count of the times I've nearly had a heart attack with him coming up behind me while making a turkey sandwich

My bearded dragon side-eyes me every time I try to sing around him. So judgmental.