Yup. I'm glad that I have it because it's good for myself but I fear that it makes me look unemotional to others.
I was about 11-12 when my parents told me they were divorcing. That night I cried for the first our or two, but later on I was fine and wasn't that sad anymore. My sister took it a lot worse. Maybe it's because she's 2 years older than me, or because she's a girl, but she cried for months and she's still not really over it.
More recently, my grandpa passed away a few weeks ago. I was staying at my dad's in St. Paul because I was there for the BTWB the night before, and when he found out from my sister he told me and then drove me home. I bawled my eyes out for the first hour of the ride, then started listening to Lana and fell asleep (
). When I woke up, I was still sad but I felt like I drained all of my emotions. The only time after that that I really cried was when I had to say goodbye to him at his casket. Of course I miss him but I got over it pretty easily. The thing is, I was never that close to him because he wasn't too active anymore, just stayed inside all day. My grandma is one of the most important people in my life so I don't know how I'll ever cope when she dies.
