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Tournament: 💎 DIAMOND HIT 💎
Member Since: 1/13/2012
Posts: 13,577
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Quote:
Originally posted by PhreshDiamond
mess ok i didn't see this bit, sorry
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Member Since: 8/17/2013
Posts: 15,907
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Quote:
Originally posted by keshaspearsxo
does it look as if i posted that
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wait r u telling me swifity is not a mentor and this is fake 
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Member Since: 1/13/2012
Posts: 13,577
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Quote:
Originally posted by PhreshDiamond
wait r u telling me swifity is not a mentor and this is fake |
no, it's real
instrumentals were made for it and all, go listen to them
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Member Since: 1/13/2012
Posts: 13,577
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what instrumentals are y'all choosing?
I'm doing 808 by 8th, what a bop. Talent did that
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Member Since: 7/15/2012
Posts: 30,915
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Quote:
Originally posted by PhreshDiamond
wait r u telling me swifity is not a mentor and this is fake |
why would i let that rat post it? 
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Member Since: 1/16/2011
Posts: 24,638
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.........
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 26,488
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Quote:
Originally posted by PhreshDiamond
mess ok i didn't see this bit, sorry
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Quote:
Originally posted by keshaspearsxo
does it look as if i posted that
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Member Since: 8/17/2013
Posts: 15,907
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Quote:
Originally posted by keshaspearsxo
why would i let that rat post it? |
i thought she was the Michelle to your RU, doing all the peasant jobs, like making banners & gifs and keeping the thread bumped
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Member Since: 7/15/2012
Posts: 30,915
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Quote:
Originally posted by PhreshDiamond
i thought she was the Michelle to your RU, doing all the peasant jobs, like making banners & gifs and keeping the thread bumped
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he's not even Santino, he's a contestant girl
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Member Since: 8/6/2015
Posts: 18,803
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 21,143
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Member Since: 1/13/2012
Posts: 13,577
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Quote:
Originally posted by Citrus
Swiftie is Charo
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 beauty queen
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Member Since: 8/17/2013
Posts: 15,907
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Quote:
Originally posted by keshaspearsxo
he's not even Santino, he's a contestant girl
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I didn't know that! its my first time, she is always in here clucking away, I assumed this was her day job.
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Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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Hugamari's Comments
Batch 3, Part 3
(let's play a game of "who got the 10")
Mxtthewdelrey – One Thud / Towel Rack
[DISCLAIMER: You are free to take what you want from this/completely ignore whatever I say] Well…What I can say about this entry is that you did what you were aiming for. It’s very PC Music, and so I feel like a lot of criticisms I have just come with the genre, and I want to be able to be accepting of various writing styles. One big thing that bothered me is that you repeated “blue” for a whole section. In a challenge where you’re supposed to make your words count, that is counter-productive. The thuds also didn’t do anything for me, and that’s like 5 words you added. One part I found humorous was the man/woman lines, it had a nice quirk to it. The simple language was endearing, but I still found myself annoyed with all the hard rhymes. I’m just going to hope the style grows on me.
MattyTacos – Storm Warning
[DISCLAIMER: You are free to take what you want from this/completely ignore whatever I say] What does the “I replaced a prize with a stone” line mean? Not in a shady way or anything, I’m just braindead and don’t get it. Your second verse was much better than your first, and was also better than the chorus, which was underwhelming. I do not have much to say about this as you did adequate on all fronts, and besides for the standout second verse, it was just forgettable. I guess I can comment on how you used the pre-chorus as the outro, that was a nice touch. I hope you’re coming to blood next week.
CountryBritney – Sssh
[DISCLAIMER: You are free to take what you want from this/completely ignore whatever I say] That title  But the way I near GASPED at two glasses line, WHEW. **** me UP. I love this concept you chose, by the way! I think you have one of the few entries that don’t come from a first-person perspective, and that was SO refreshing to see! You did really well on the first challenge, and to be honest, I didn’t expect less from you. Welcome back. 
Citrus – Shoebox
[DISCLAIMER: You are free to take what you want from this/completely ignore whatever I say] Okay. Okay. Okay. I really don’t think you expect anything but praise??? I have one thing I do want to say: “feeling you was feeling right”, although I got the idea behind it, felt unneeded to me, as you already emphasized the word in the line before it, 3 times just became a bit monotonous. Regardless, I’m pretty sure you know how well you did and don’t need me to sit here telling you.
Vulnicura – Chrysalis
[DISCLAIMER: You are free to take what you want from this/completely ignore whatever I say] I’m mixed. I legitimately feel like you sent this just to make fun of the way people use imagery in songs, yet I’m still an unironic fan. Delete some of these words, though, like “abyss”. It’s very…edgy in a goth kid way. I suppose this is a story of love and heartbreak, but the language makes it hard to tell. Don’t lose yourself in your imagery, girl!
Jpow – Heal Myself
[DISCLAIMER: You are free to take what you want from this/completely ignore whatever I say] You know, I think a song with the inspirations you chose is limited with a structured format, because I think it’s more free-flowing, and you could have incorporated that into your song. Speaking of, there aren’t any stand out lines, and your chorus just as easily could have been another verse, and if you ARE going to do a typical format, the chorus should pop out. I liked the idea, but you could have executed it better.
Abyssy – Angel/Demon
[DISCLAIMER: You are free to take what you want from this/completely ignore whatever I say] Okay, **** me up a bit! I have no idea why you were worried because honestly I really enjoyed this. You better ASK those philosophical questions! You also know the power of juxtaposition and used it effectively. The one thing I can say is that it did get wordy at times, which is counter-productive to the challenge. But this was really good for a first round entry, beginner or otherwise! 
Speezy – Drained By a Rose
[DISCLAIMER: You are free to take what you want from this/completely ignore whatever I say] You should proof-read your entries before sending.  Anyway, I appreciated the consistent theme in your metaphors, but the way they were executed felt…off. For instance, the tense-jumping between the first two lines was weird, then you jump back to the past tense in the fourth line. Also, the stay/say lines, awkward mostly because the “say” line felt there to fill a rhyme. “told” would’ve worked better. The choruses (all of them) were underwhelming as well; they don’t stick out like they’re supposed to. (Sidenote: Hello? Red Rose Beast would’ve been a cute title idk why you were struggling, that one popped out immediately to me.)
Blue.
[DISCLAIMER: You are free to take what you want from this/completely ignore whatever I say] Someone else who should proof-read their entries before sending in. Anyway, I’m guessing this is an empowerment anthem? It’s a bit hard to tell. Also, I’m not really getting song from this. Maybe because there weren’t many rhymes or much of a rhythm to hold on to. I don’t think a song necessarily needs those, but it’d definitely help, especially in this competition. I also couldn’t help but feel like this is typical and forgettable. Hopefully the next time you submit, it’s something more memorable.
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Member Since: 8/6/2015
Posts: 18,803
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Good work Huga on doing your job
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Member Since: 1/13/2012
Posts: 13,577
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Quote:
Originally posted by PhreshDiamond
I didn't know that! its my first time, she is always in here clucking away, I assumed this was her day job.
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1) you stayed pearched today more than anyone
2) no swiftie, no ratings
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 43,104
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Quote:
Originally posted by PhreshDiamond
mess ok i didn't see this bit, sorry
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 26,488
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dylobs
Good work Huga on doing your job |
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 43,104
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Wow, Abyssy is coming for blood!
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Member Since: 8/17/2013
Posts: 15,907
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Quote:
Originally posted by swiftie13
1) you stayed pearched today more than anyone
2) no swiftie, no ratings
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I thought someone should answer your constant babble.
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