Quote:
Originally posted by collin
"Porcelain Black debuts ne-"
Why do I feel like she will come out and say RedOne raped her.
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In a ramshackle apartment in western LA, Porcelain Black picks up her 2007 Motorola RAZR. She types in a number given to her by one of her former co-workers.
A woman picks up on the other line.
"Hello?", Porcelain whispers.
"Who is this?" Lady Gaga replies.
"It's Porcelain. We need to go over the plan"
"Look, I'm going on my Oscar campaign for Till It Happens to You starting today. I need you to come forward and claim RedOne sexually assaulted you. You saw how much press Ketchup got - more than she ever has. And it's making me look like a Martyr. We make him look like a villian, you get free press, and TITHY might jump a few spots on iTunes before the Oscars. Do it now. I'll call you tomorrow"
The line cuts out. In her musty apartment, Porcelain opens her 2008 Lenovo and begins typing an e-mail to PerezHilton.com.
