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Tournament: PLΔTINUM HIT • season six
ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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Quote:
Originally posted by Hugamari
One person dropped out, one person has immunity, and I graded the duet as one entry - they both share a number.
I still don't know if that makes up for it or not, and I was confused myself...but I made sure I judged every entry I had in my inbox.
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Well 22 contestants made it. So with that, there should be 22 - 3... 19 entries. You have 17. 
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Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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Sonny & Cher isn't as obvious as you think, by the way. Neither is Ke$ha.
Also, don't be discouraged by my numbers too much - I think my lowest is Fefe's highest.
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Member Since: 8/31/2013
Posts: 21,462
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Yeah, I assumed he counted the duet as 1, plus didn't comment on the immunity, but that still brings his total hints to 19 and it should be 20. Hugs, I guess you're missing one hint but as long as you sent 18 scores it doesn't matter.
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 21,143
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 37,384
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 37,384
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Quote:
Originally posted by keshaspearsxo
Will Hug's comments be posted soon? I wanna stay up for them but it's super late here  |
I'll start adding them now
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Member Since: 7/15/2012
Posts: 30,915
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Quote:
Originally posted by GotSkill
I'll start adding them now
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Thanks 
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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I'm assuming Sonny & Cher is either Citrus or the two contestants who worked together, most likely the latter.
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Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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Quote:
Originally posted by Sam Jay
I'm assuming Sonny & Cher is either Citrus or the two contestants who worked together, most likely the latter. |
Bad Meets Evil are also a 2 person group.
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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Anyway, I won't be too disheartened if I do get eliminated. I probably should have put my best foot forward and focussed more on the lyrics than just trying to create a catchy sarcastic rap collab. But it's okay. I'll keep writing no matter what happens. 
Quote:
Originally posted by Hugamari
Bad Meets Evil are also a 2 person group.
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True... I forgot about that. 
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 37,384
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Well the character count went over by 1000 so I here's part 2 of the comments. You can find part 1 by clicking the link in the OP. I'll pretty this up in a second
 Truth Teller - Thank You. I Love You. Goodbye
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Originally posted by GotSkill
Without revealing too much to the other contestants (and don’t say anything in the thread), your entry kinda encompasses what the next round will be about .
You took a different approach to the female part. I like that you didn’t use the clichés about kissing under moonlight, but instead talked about cornfields under sunlight. This entry also reminds me of Element’s from last round, and I have to say I like it just as much. You’re shaping up to be a real contender in this competition. I hope we keep seeing nothing but great things come from you. |
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Originally posted by feelslikeadream
I really liked the mood in this one, which I can see as a really pretty mid-tempo ballad a la Katy’s “Double Rainbow.” Not sure what the “earth’s shatter” is and some of it is a little too sentimental (the very FIRST time they ever meet, they walk slowly toward each other and kiss? No greeting?) but the rest of the lyrics are strong enough (I esp. like the first verse) to redeem it and make it one of the best entries. After two strong entries in a row, you’re an early contestant to watch…
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Originally posted by Hugamari
The feeling I just got when I realized how perfect the title was with the song. Help.  There were a lot of love songs this round, but you did it so FLAWLESSLY.  Ugh, just take ALL of my money. |
EuphorianSea - Wooden Branches (Where We Begin)
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Originally posted by GotSkill
Prose poetry and urban influenced lyrics definitely mix interestingly. That was my first thought while reading through this. That aside, there was things I liked and didn’t like about this. The “into your inn” line was weak, but I loved the hook. It was super clever and I loved the metaphor of “nowhere else to grow”.
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Quote:
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Originally posted by feelslikeadream
The switching between the male/female parts is disorienting. I can’t imagine listening to a song that switches quite this much. I don’t understand the “inn” part. An inn is a place where strangers come and go; is this song about someone trying to be a temporary part of someone’s life, because it doesn’t sound like that. That leads to my main critique: some of your word choices/phrases get lost in the poeticism and sacrifice meaning in that move; “creating our own shadows” for example—everything creates its own shadow. Besides from some of these phrases that didn’t really work when you scrutinize them, other lyrics were good. I especially like the bridge.
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Originally posted by Hugamari
This (United States of) American flag teas I am getting from this color coding. (oh, and I give a tutorial on how to censor bypass on Sam Jay's comments, so you may want to check that out.)
ANYWAY, I can tell if using "stumped" was clever writing or a painful pun. Actually, the whole hook part feels like a bunch of puns...so that takes a bit away from the song. I'd probably appreciate it more if this were a rap song, but |
MattyTacos - Take You There
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Originally posted by GotSkill
This would have such a good music video 
This was much stronger than your entry last week. I love the whole concept of a girl not wanting to leave her boyfriend because she doesn’t want to break her heart, but then you put the sex part of it tastefully in there. While this wasn’t my absolute favorite this round, it was the start of something amazing that I could see growing you into a huge force in this game. |
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Originally posted by feelslikeadream
The structure of the song is a little messy at times. The verses don’t look anything alike and the intro is longer (and better) than the verses. Some of the lines are broken up in a kind of weird way, I assume to show how you’re singing it, but remember the judges can’t hear that so it seems scattered. As for the meaning, I like the pairing in this duet a lot, i.e. a relationship built on guilt. But a lot of the lyrics were very familiar and the rhyme scheme seemed off. Parts rhymed and set up the expectation for it to keep rhyming and then it just didn’t. I think the idea is good here but the actual lyrics/rhythm need some tightening.
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Originally posted by Hugamari
*sigh* babe with babe? 
Why do I get the feeling that this is a bit...all over the place? I can't even read it like one song. It feels like excerpts from a few songs, and it's a lyrical mashup.  I don't know man...just not feeling it. |
BeyonceHatesMe - Crown
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Originally posted by GotSkill
Another interesting approach to the challenge. You and Sam Jay did very similar songs this week. I loved Bey’s verse and Nicki’s was OK. When doing a Nicki verse I would hope you would do a lot more clever metaphors and double-entendres than you did. I also wish your song was a bit longer, considering the chorus didn’t really add much and the verses were the meat of your song. Another verse or bridge from Nicki would’ve been nice.
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Originally posted by feelslikeadream
This feels so short since the chorus is so repetitive and the two verses are short too. This sounds like a 2-minute song. I didn’t mind the Beyonce verse. The Nicki verse had some ‘flow’ issues. Like why use “upon” instead of “on” in the second line when that adds a syllable and makes the line uneven? And I hope the “slay” line is a purposeful allusion to her line in the “TTWE” remix. Otherwise I could hear Nicki’s voice as I read the rest. But still, the chorus is so important and I felt like this one wasn’t as strong as it could be and I don’t even understand what it’s saying tbh.
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Originally posted by Hugamari
Refer to Sam Jay's comments for tips on how to censor bypass. I promise I will not report any PMs you send to me!
I actually feel like the swearing was NOT necessary in this song...although I guess I feel like that with every song.  I also am not all too fond of the use of actual artists, and the stuttering in the chorus. OVERLOOKING ALL OF THIS, it wasn't bad for a rap song, and "I'm so crown" seems like it has potential. |
Citrus - O.D.
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Originally posted by GotSkill
I wasn’t expecting this from you at all. Your entry last round was solid but not memorable enough that I could recall it immediately.
This song, on the other hand, caught me by complete surprise. I love the way the chorus progresses from the first chorus to the second chorus from the club to the ICU. This to me feels like a song that could both be a smash on radio and be critically acclaimed at the same time.
There were some really clever lines too, like “at least I drink so” that added an extra layer to the song. Literally the only thing I don’t absolutely love about this song is the “knock off Crisco” line, although I don’t go clubbing often so that could be a reference to something I don’t get  . This was a very strong entry from you and a side I’d love to see you continue to explore in the coming rounds. |
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Originally posted by feelslikeadream
This was one of the better entries in terms of rhythm—I felt like as I read I could pick up on the rhythm/tempo since the lines were almost metered. I like the message of the song, and thought some lines were cool (like the Snow White one) while others were kind of clunky (the ‘drowing’ bit) and the difference between “she” and “I” was a little unclear, esp. in the last chorus.
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Originally posted by Hugamari
 good job on the censor bypassing. Shame I am on console, so I had to highlight to see the black letter.
Oddly enough, I really like the bridge for some reason. I can't pin-point it, but I just really like it. It was the highlight of the song imo.
Also...is this even a duet? I didn't read it like one. |
Saint - Untitléd
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Originally posted by GotSkill
I’m glad you were able to scrape up some time to submit for this round instead of dropping out! Just as you said, the song was pretty basic but I don’t think you were aspiring for greatness anyways.
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Originally posted by feelslikeadream
This song has some repetitive language and doesn’t really offer anything unique to the heartbreak song formula. Is this even a duet?
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Hugamari
I feel like I've seen this submission before...maybe not word-for-word, but I guess it just comes to the point where it feels same-y. (Although I'm really one to talk...*looks at my S4 entries*)
Disregarding the theme, the opening line has a sort of charm to it, and I like it. After that, it felt just...there. Words were just there.
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Element - Yin + Yang
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Originally posted by GotSkill
I feel like this is a song I would have to hear to fully comprehend. Unfortunately this is solely a lyric competition so I had to make judgments based on what I was given. Still, I could see this being a hit song (which Jordin needs right now anyways ). This wasn’t quite as strong as last week for you and it left me wanting more. Especially the “forces of my person” line felt a little awkward to me. Your round 1 entry led me to believe you could make it far in this competition, so hopefully you stick around long enough to show me that side of you again. |
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Originally posted by feelslikeadream
ORDIN SPARKS?  JT would NEVER. Anyway, I like some of the chorus here and think the song worked as a duet, but the message is muddled to me. JS wants to be brought to the dark side and JT wants to take her, but then the chorus says “My feet are on the edge, please don’t let me fall.” That’s confusing. Sounds like from V1 she wants to fall off the edge, i.e. do something fun/daring and not boring like her life usually is. That inconsistency is confusing. The confusion carries to V2, where JT thinks she needs sin in her life, but also wants her to be the light in his life. Well what do these people actually want? There are also a few awkward phrases (“are all the time”; “forces of my person”). My favorite part is the “Better” repetition in the chorus/bridge. |
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Originally posted by Hugamari
Well, I definitely want to hear a collab from them, now! I imagined this song in Justin Timberlake's sound, and it was really good! I would drag you for using actual artists, but I think it may have added to the song a bit. |
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 37,384
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Speezy has chosen to use ha immunity for next week's challenge, thus tomorrow's elimination will now be a triple elimination
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Member Since: 8/31/2013
Posts: 21,462
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Hmmm very interesting. Now I feel nervous though 
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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omg Hug's comment wasn't so bad after all.
I'm probably Nicki Minaj then.
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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Quote:
Originally posted by GotSkill
Speezy has chosen to use ha immunity for next week's challenge, thus tomorrow's elimination will now be a triple elimination
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Speezy you legend, you just spared someone another week.
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 37,384
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Quote:
Originally posted by Sam Jay
Speezy you legend, you just spared someone another week. |
Just wait until you find out who he spared
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 15,127
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well things are thought better in your head
ill post the song soon
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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Wait, if Speezy's using his immunity next week, does that low-key confirm that he's safe this round?
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Member Since: 7/15/2012
Posts: 30,915
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Quote:
Originally posted by Hugamari
I remember you talking about this (the theme of the song, not the song itself) a while back, so I already know that there's a bit of personal experience in this song - that's one of the best things to rely on for inspiration, and it invokes the most powerful feelings most of the time.
I legit did not know you were a writer, let alone a good one, until you decided to enter this competition. Heck, I'll even be honest with you, I thought round 1 was a fluke, but you've proven me wrong on that, so thank you! Keep it up and you'll go far!
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I had a short, messy stint in the songwriter thread with you when it began about 2 years ago when I was still new and wrote out of humour and imagination, but I stopped posting and other than that I have never really been open about it. Thank God I improved from those days I totally got the feeling that you thought I was joking about this too
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 37,384
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Quote:
Originally posted by Sam Jay
Wait, if Speezy's using his immunity next week, does that low-key confirm that he's safe this round? |
you'll see
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