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Discussion: Would you let your son wear a dress?
Member Since: 7/9/2010
Posts: 31,471
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Eh. Outside of school, probably. I don't want them to be hurt by others' words
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Member Since: 11/28/2011
Posts: 27,495
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Quote:
Originally posted by Su-Barbie-A
I'll force my daugther to stay in the kitchen and become a perfect mother because that's the appropiate gender role, not that hard, right? |
ddd. Is letting your daughter outside the kitchen going to get her beaten up/bullied at school. Is it gonna get her weird stares in public and so on? Is it going to have the potential of confusing her and her gender? Sounds like it's either your way, or the extreme way? No nuances or exceptions? Think of freedom like a rope/leash for dog or even a child if that helps. Because that's what it comes down to, freedom. Keep the leash too short and you degrade their quality of life, have it too long and they can distance themselves out site and too far from your protection. You can't give your child whatever he/she wants.
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 14,949
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No. Being a parent is not about letting your child do what he wants.
I understand that this might be his form of expression but I'm not letting him get hurt by other kids and adults.
If he was old enough to know how harsh people can be and he wanted to wear a dress then go ahead but it's not happening as a child.
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 7,253
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Quote:
Originally posted by Jae
Your child's well being should come before their happiness. I'm not saying your children should be miserable but as a parent you need to recognise that society has gender norms, and those that deviate are negatively sanctioned by their peers, employers, etc.
I wouldn't consider a boy wearing a dress to be 'problematic' but it's not normal, because it deviates from society's gender norms.
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Not normal? What is normal? The same excuse is said about gay marriage. It was also said black people using the same toilets as while people in America... That's not a good enough excuse. Give me one, minus religion, or "not normal"
And of course well being should be #1, but their happiness is a big factor of that. If it made them happy, then let them. It's clothing. It's not saying yes to them smoking crack. I will tell them that people won't always understand, but if they still want too, then so what? Then I'll teach him to not pay attention to the well meaning morons and that some people are too ignorant and small minded to see past their own nose.
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 12,199
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Quote:
Originally posted by Honeyßéy
So, you don't think the constant bullying & hate he will receive.. will make him
a trouble "possibly" dead child... 
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I was bullied throughout high school, I'm still alive and kicking. A supportive family that loves you no matter and encourages you to be who you truly are is what's most important.
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Member Since: 8/1/2012
Posts: 25,037
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Quote:
Originally posted by SlayingOnTheEarth
In the closet? Not comfortable enough to say it proudly, even on a predominantly gay forum? That explains your answers then...
Aren't you from the Netherlands/somewhere in Europe? You should be more open minded  |
Keep guessing you might get an answer!
This has nothing to do with being open minded but with the well being of my child. Years later he'd be thankful I didn't let him wear that dress. They're kids.... How are they gonna understand the consequences of their behavior. As a parent you can protect them against that cuz a boy wearing a dress can make him an easy target.
Y'all are putting your child's life at risk so he can wear a stupid piece of fabric. Y'all are not ready for kids.
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 34,855
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Quote:
Originally posted by Nait Phoenix
I'd warn him about what to expect if he does, but it's ultimately his decision…
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This.
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 3,392
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Member Since: 1/26/2012
Posts: 3,272
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Quote:
Originally posted by ReginaPhalange
I was bullied throughout high school, I'm still alive and kicking. A supportive family that loves you no matter and encourages you to be who you truly are is what's most important.
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But that's you tho, everyone is not gonna go through the same experiences as you. Some kids can simply ignore the bullying & others can't. Everyone's mental state is not the same as yours.
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Member Since: 8/17/2013
Posts: 6,565
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Quote:
Originally posted by SlayingOnTheEarth
Not normal? What is normal? The same excuse is said about gay marriage. It was also said black people using the same toilets as while people in America... That's not a good enough excuse. Give me one, minus religion, or "not normal"
And of course well being should be #1, but their happiness is a big factor of that. If it made them happy, then let them. It's clothing. It's not saying yes to them smoking crack. I will tell them that people won't always understand, but if they still want too, then so what? Then I'll teach him to not pay attention to the well meaning morons and that some people are too ignorant and small minded to see past their own nose
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Behaviour that conforms to society's norms is 'normal'.
Yes, it is just clothing, but people judge each other based on the brands of clothes they're wearing alone, so you can only imagine the **** a boy would get in school for wearing a dress. I'd rather my child wasn't bullied for dressing "like a girl" and made up their mind when they're 18.
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Member Since: 8/18/2013
Posts: 1,217
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Quote:
Originally posted by RomanNavy
Yes I think your child would be very happy getting beaten up every day in his dress. Take some responsibility for your child cuz y'all are setting him up for disaster. Your the parents you need to protect him from the world and a dress is an invitation to beat him up in todays society.
And no I'm not a bigoted bible bashing red neck. You don't need to insult to make your point clear.
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So, I as the parent should be blamed for my kid getting beaten up in class everyday? I'm not going to pander to bullies, especially when their children for crying out loud. If anything ever did happen I'd make damn sure the school did something about the matter. You know what needs to change? Society's deception of gender normalcy - and it's only going to change if people like me and you do something about it.
And I'm not saying you are; I'm saying you share an opinion which could strike a parallel. People on this site share some incredibly conservative opinions, even if they don't realise it.
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Member Since: 8/17/2013
Posts: 6,565
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Quote:
Originally posted by RomanNavy
Keep guessing you might get an answer!
This has nothing to do with being open minded but with the well being of my child. Years later he'd be thankful I didn't let him wear that dress. They're kids.... How are they gonna understand the consequences of their behavior. As a parent you can protect them against that cuz a boy wearing a dress can make him an easy target.
Y'all are putting your child's life at risk so he can wear a stupid piece of fabric. Y'all are not ready for kids.
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!
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 7,253
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Quote:
Originally posted by ReginaPhalange
I was bullied throughout high school, I'm still alive and kicking. A supportive family that loves you no matter and encourages you to be who you truly are is what's most important.
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Exactly!
It's an ideal situation to have unconditional love and support from family members, than to be bullied and misunderstood by family. That stuff leads to homeless youth and multiple problems from there
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 12,199
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Quote:
Originally posted by Honeyßéy
But that's you tho, everyone is not gonna go through the same experiences as you. Some kids can simply ignore the bullying & others can't. Everyone's mental state is not the same as yours.
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Obviously, but if he was a trans person and I denied him the right to be who he truly wanted to be, that would do a lot more damage mentally than any amount of bullying could ever do
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Member Since: 6/4/2010
Posts: 38,919
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Quote:
Originally posted by ReginaPhalange
I was bullied throughout high school, I'm still alive and kicking. A supportive family that loves you no matter and encourages you to be who you truly are is what's most important.
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So you'd subject your child to being bullied/teased/beaten because he'd come home to a loving and supportive family? 
Some of you are being totally illogical.
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Member Since: 11/15/2011
Posts: 5,947
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Quote:
Originally posted by Rihinvention
Of course I would.
That's a pretty open-ended question though. I mean most kids 0-5 love playing dress-ups, so wearing a dress wouldn't really mean anything.
If it wasn't for dress-ups though, and he wanted to wear it in public or on a day-to-day basis, I would take him to a therapist specialising in Gender Identity Disorder to find out if he was trans, and if she was, I'd start taking the necessary steps to help her transition, and would let her know that if she every changed her mind, all she'd have to do is let me know.
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Perfect answer.
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 3,400
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While I never had an inclination to wear a dress, I'm so grateful a lot of you guys aren't my parents.
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Member Since: 9/4/2012
Posts: 23,263
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Member Since: 4/3/2014
Posts: 2,290
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Member Since: 11/28/2011
Posts: 27,495
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Quote:
Originally posted by Nait Phoenix
I'd warn him about what to expect if he does, but it's ultimately his decision…
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No offense but this is how most of y'all will fail at parenting. Letting your child make potentially critical decisions that could affect their safety, mental health and overall well being. You can tell him the consequences 100 times and he could still make a decision he can't handle (the wrong decision). Anyone with a younger sibling or anyone with common sense would understand that an infant is poor at critical thinking. That's why we make decisions for them.
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