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Discussion: Sounding "gay" - do you?
Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 282
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Quote:
Originally posted by ahauntingnearu
uuuuuuumm nope, no insecurity, no loathing, just general lack of attraction to said behavior.
mess |
Amen
Everyone has different tastes & those that cannot handle it can deal with it
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Originally posted by Dinosauer
It's an embarrassing comment more than anything. The insecure loathing.  |
He might be proud of being gay and parade it around but if he doesn't like high fem voice then he is self loathing? People can have an opinion without being self loathing.
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 7,055
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I don't think I have a gay voice, I'm a rapper, and none of the comments on my YouTube say that I sound gay. So I'm good over here. I'm in the closet, so that's even better 
But that one guy is right, not everybody likes feminism gay guys. We're gay (I'm bi) which means we like guys, not girls. So why would we date a guy who acts like a girl? (Besides being on ATRL and saying YASS Gaga!) How do we get turned on by that? Just an opinion you guys, nothing offensive
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Member Since: 1/4/2014
Posts: 22,877
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Quote:
Originally posted by SmokeOnDiamonds
But that one guy is right, not everybody likes feminism gay guys. We're gay (I'm bi) which means we like guys, not girls. So why would we date a guy who acts like a girl? (Besides being on ATRL and saying YASS Gaga!) How do we get turned on by that? Just an opinion you guys, nothing offensive
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Don't you see the problem with how you throw around words like "feminine"? (even though you said "feminism"  ) Saying dumb things like "I like my guys to be guys" has this undercurrent of misogyny, like the slightest stereotypical womanly trait is an instant-turn off. It just all leads back into the straight worship and that, if he want to be accepted/attractive/admired, we have to align ourselves with the harshest, most brutal aspects of masculinity and stereotypical almost Aryan-like appearance to live up to expectations.
Not that sexuality has any direct ties with individual physicality, ATRL likes to throw around the word "preference" like you're genetically wired to like only a small selection of things. It's societal conditioning that paints the portrait of Asian men as weaker and more metro, or more outwardly-emotional and flamboyant men as "feminine" gays. There's just some serious problematic ways of thinking about gay men on ATRL that I find really disturbing, and I mean sure most of the members are high school students without a clue on LGBT academia, but there's more to it than the simplistic "this is what I like and I can't help" it arguments. Preferences aren't genetically wired, they're constructed.
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 7,055
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dinosauer
Don't you see the problem with how you throw around words like "feminine"? ( even though you said "feminism" ) |
My fault.
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Member Since: 3/5/2011
Posts: 30,130
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Quote:
Originally posted by ahauntingnearu
uuuuuuumm nope, no insecurity, no loathing, just general lack of attraction to said behavior.
mess
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It seems this whole thread was a way of having everyone on ATRL come and say that it is okay to constantly sound like someone is gripping your balls in a vice, sending your voice higher than Lindsay Lohan on a night out. Anyone who has said anything to the contrary has been accused of self-loathing and insecurity.
The world is the way it is. Acting like a flamboyant drama-queen will do nothing to make us seem more socially acceptable to the homophobic people in our culture. I'm not saying it is right, but it is the way it is.
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Member Since: 1/4/2014
Posts: 22,877
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Quote:
Originally posted by Darren-5-08
It seems this whole thread was a way of having everyone on ATRL come and say that it is okay to constantly sound like someone is gripping your balls in a vice, sending your voice higher than Lindsay Lohan on a night out. Anyone who has said anything to the contrary has been accused of self-loathing and insecurity.
The world is the way it is. Acting like a flamboyant drama-queen will do nothing to make us seem more socially acceptable to the homophobic people in our culture. I'm not saying it is right, but it is the way it is.
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Pitch is only one aspect of a "gay" voice, I'm insecure about my voice but not because it's at all high. As for " I'm not saying it is right, but it is the way it is.", that's exactly why it's our prerogative as members as of the LGBTQIA spectrum to push forward and progress at every given moment. You should never say "this is how it is" and think that's an acceptable reason for anything oppressing or unjust.
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Member Since: 8/17/2013
Posts: 7,248
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my japanese friend and korean friend tell me I sound 200% more gay speaking japanese/korean, respectively
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Member Since: 1/4/2014
Posts: 22,877
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Quote:
Originally posted by Nonchalant
my japanese friend and korean friend tell me I sound 200% more gay speaking japanese/korean, respectively |
Hate to think how my Japanese sounds. 
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Member Since: 3/5/2011
Posts: 30,130
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dinosauer
Pitch is only one aspect of a "gay" voice, I'm insecure about my voice but not because it's at all high. As for "I'm not saying it is right, but it is the way it is.", that's exactly why it's our prerogative as members as of the LGBTQIA spectrum to push forward and progress at every given moment. You should never say "this is how it is" and think that's an acceptable reason for anything oppressing or unjust.
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I am not a member of the LGBTQIA community. LGBT at a push. Just as feminists have a separate campaign, so too should transexuals and pansexuals and mansexuals and bansexuals and whatever else sort of -sexuals are going to creep out of the woodwork. I am gay. And I cannot stand when gay people put on a very feminine, flamboyant voice. It makes me feel uncomfortable because I know that no-one really talks like that.
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Member Since: 3/15/2013
Posts: 4,060
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dinosauer
Don't you see the problem with how you throw around words like "feminine"? (even though you said "feminism" ) Saying dumb things like "I like my guys to be guys" has this undercurrent of misogyny, like the slightest stereotypical womanly trait is an instant-turn off. It just all leads back into the straight worship and that, if he want to be accepted/attractive/admired, we have to align ourselves with the harshest, most brutal aspects of masculinity and stereotypical almost Aryan-like appearance to live up to expectations.
Not that sexuality has any direct ties with individual physicality, ATRL likes to throw around the word "preference" like you're genetically wired to like only a small selection of things. It's societal conditioning that paints the portrait of Asian men as weaker and more metro, or more outwardly-emotional and flamboyant men as "feminine" gays. There's just some serious problematic ways of thinking about gay men on ATRL that I find really disturbing, and I mean sure most of the members are high school students without a clue on LGBT academia, but there's more to it than the simplistic "this is what I like and I can't help" it arguments. Preferences aren't genetically wired, they're constructed. |
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Member Since: 1/4/2014
Posts: 22,877
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Quote:
Originally posted by Darren-5-08
I am not a member of the LGBTQIA community. LGBT at a push. Just as feminists have a separate campaign, so too should transexuals and pansexuals and mansexuals and bansexuals and whatever else sort of -sexuals are going to creep out of the woodwork. I am gay. And I cannot stand when gay people put on a very feminine, flamboyant voice. It makes me feel uncomfortable because I know that no-one really talks like that.
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You " know" something wrong? Hmm. Good for you you. 
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Member Since: 3/5/2011
Posts: 30,130
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dinosauer
You " know" something wrong? Hmm. Good for you you. |
I know that people put it on. It makes me uncomfortable. I am a gay man trying to make my way in the world, and I am sick of having to live with the constant stereotype that everyone like me acts in a way that makes a lot of people uncomfortable. I like that when I meet people, they can't tell whether I am straight or gay until they ask me or I tell them.
And I don't appreciate your sarcastic response. You shouldn't have started this thread if you didn't want people to tell you it as it is.
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Member Since: 1/4/2014
Posts: 22,877
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Quote:
Originally posted by Darren-5-08
I know that people put it on. It makes me uncomfortable. I am a gay man trying to make my way in the world, and I am sick of having to live with the constant stereotype that everyone like me acts in a way that makes a lot of people uncomfortable. I like that when I meet people, they can't tell whether I am straight or gay until they ask me or I tell them.
And I don't appreciate your sarcastic response. You shouldn't have started this thread if you didn't want people to tell you it as it is.
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I'm not responding to you to be appreciative, I'm picking out your argument's flaws. The way someone talks is dependant upon who they surround themselves with, where they live and what kind of voices/people they regularly see/hear. So if you're an out and proud gay guy who hangs out with valley girls in L.A., just like an accent, you're going to pick up their way of talking - in a way, like we pick up the lingo on ATRL and throw it around.
No gay guys I know decide "Oh I'm going to talk really outrageously and gets lots of hateful and homophobic attention cause that's fun!" It's how they feel is a natural way to talk, and they should never be criticised or have someone such as yourself throw it in their face. Yes gay stereotypes are unfortunate and we all occasionally groan when some OTT queen exists and because of that, people assume we have similar traits somewhere suppressed inside. But the real point is we need to be secure in ourselves - if a stereotype is the worst thing you're fighting against as an out of the closer gay guy, it's not the hardest thing to overcome; you just gotta be yourself.
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Member Since: 3/5/2011
Posts: 30,130
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dinosauer
I'm not responding to you to be appreciative, I'm picking out your argument's flaws. The way someone talks is dependant upon who they surround themselves with, where they live and what kind of voices/people they regularly see/hear. So if you're an out and proud gay guy who hangs out with valley girls in L.A., just like an accent, you're going to pick up their way of talking - in a way, like we pick up the lingo on ATRL and throw it around.
No gay guys I know decide "Oh I'm going to talk really outrageously and gets lots of hateful and homophobic attention cause that's fun!" It's how they feel is a natural way to talk, and they should never be criticised or have someone such as yourself throw it in their face. Yes gay stereotypes are unfortunate and we all occasionally groan when some OTT queen exists and because of that, people assume we have similar traits somewhere suppressed inside. But the real point is we need to be secure in ourselves - if a stereotype is the worst thing you're fighting against as an out of the closer gay guy, it's not the hardest thing to overcome; you just gotta be yourself.
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Fortunately things are very different in the UK, and no-one really talks like that apart from gay men. Which is why I know a lot of it is faked and exaggerated, because the only way you are ever exposed to that way of speaking is by watching it in TV and films. And that really annoys me.
I don't throw it in their face, either. I just make an effort not to spend time around them. I don't feel like I have similar traits suppressed inside either. I just don't like the way they act, because I don't want to be tarred with the same brush as them. I will continue to be myself; confident, secure, popular, and most certainly not 'gay-sounding'.
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Member Since: 1/4/2014
Posts: 22,877
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Quote:
Originally posted by Darren-5-08
I don't throw it in their face, either. I just make an effort not to spend time around them. I don't feel like I have similar traits suppressed inside either. I just don't like the way they act, because I don't want to be tarred with the same brush as them. I will continue to be myself; confident, secure, popular, and most certainly not 'gay-sounding'.
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Now sis.  "confident, secure" and " certainly not 'gay-sounding'". Anyway, run along now lamb. I get ya.
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Member Since: 3/5/2011
Posts: 30,130
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dinosauer
Now sis. "confident, secure" and " certainly not 'gay-sounding'". Anyway, run along now lamb. I get ya. |
I don't really know what you're getting at, to be honest. Earlier in this thread I already admitted that there are uncontrollable moments in which I am a little bit more excitable and flamboyant. But the rest of the time I am completely normal. For that, I am thankful.
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Member Since: 3/15/2013
Posts: 2,974
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I don't really have a gay voice but sometimes when I get excited about something I tend to get one. My brother and sister have made fun of it before like mocking me, but I just have to get past it and move along.
It's just sad that people are judged by their voices these days.
My brother yesterday: "Rome wasn't a holy place at all. So why is Latin the holy language of Christianity? It doesn't make sense."
Me: "Why not?"
Him: "Because they were all homos."
Disgusting. Thank God I'm older.
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Member Since: 3/16/2012
Posts: 7,827
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dinosauer
Don't you see the problem with how you throw around words like "feminine"? (even though you said "feminism" ) Saying dumb things like "I like my guys to be guys" has this undercurrent of misogyny, like the slightest stereotypical womanly trait is an instant-turn off. It just all leads back into the straight worship and that, if he want to be accepted/attractive/admired, we have to align ourselves with the harshest, most brutal aspects of masculinity and stereotypical almost Aryan-like appearance to live up to expectations.
Not that sexuality has any direct ties with individual physicality, ATRL likes to throw around the word "preference" like you're genetically wired to like only a small selection of things. It's societal conditioning that paints the portrait of Asian men as weaker and more metro, or more outwardly-emotional and flamboyant men as "feminine" gays. There's just some serious problematic ways of thinking about gay men on ATRL that I find really disturbing, and I mean sure most of the members are high school students without a clue on LGBT academia, but there's more to it than the simplistic "this is what I like and I can't help" it arguments. Preferences aren't genetically wired, they're constructed. |
To be honest you probably made a lot of great points, but it's a waste of my time to read. I don't care about gay academia. I don't care if my views of the gays are ignorant. I like who I like, I am attracted to what I am attracted to, and I feel how I feel, and I don't care why or if that offends anyone else.
I think you're probably insecure with yourself. My best friend/boyfriend is also obviously gay and we make gay jokes all the time. Our other friend who is straight makes gay jokes. It's partly because I go to a really liberal college where it's more than ok to be gay and open, but I like the fact that I can joke about my sexuality. Doesn't make me insecure or self-loathing...it makes me very comfortable with who I am. I hate how uptight so many gays are, especially the idiot ones (probably like a lot of the ones in this thread) who can call themselves **** but as soon as someone else does it is the end of the world.
Well anyway, I think people with the stereotypical "gay voice" are annoying and unattractive. That's how it is, Dinosaur, and you will probably live knowing that
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Member Since: 11/16/2011
Posts: 11,544
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Member Since: 3/5/2011
Posts: 30,130
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Quote:
Originally posted by ahauntingnearu
To be honest you probably made a lot of great points, but it's a waste of my time to read. I don't care about gay academia. I don't care if my views of the gays are ignorant. I like who I like, I am attracted to what I am attracted to, and I feel how I feel, and I don't care why or if that offends anyone else.
I think you're probably insecure with yourself. My best friend/boyfriend is also obviously gay and we make gay jokes all the time. Our other friend who is straight makes gay jokes. It's partly because I go to a really liberal college where it's more than ok to be gay and open, but I like the fact that I can joke about my sexuality. Doesn't make me insecure or self-loathing...it makes me very comfortable with who I am. I hate how uptight so many gays are, especially the idiot ones (probably like a lot of the ones in this thread) who can call themselves **** but as soon as someone else does it is the end of the world.
Well anyway, I think people with the stereotypical "gay voice" are annoying and unattractive. That's how it is, Dinosaur, and you will probably live knowing that
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