I'm in one right now. The sex is amazing. I've known him for a year and a half now. We started out doing it no strings attached, but I eventually developed feelings after a while. I've been going crazy on him, blowing up his phone and causing him to get angry and block me. I've expressed to him how much I've wanted a relationship, and he doesn't want one. In fact, he's dating girls because he says "he doesn't want to be gay anymore, he wants to be straight". I'm so hurt about that.
Ever since I've become too attached to him, he puts rules on the sex and sometimes only wants oral done to him. He still wants to be buds (if I calm down, which I usually can't), and he claims to still care about me, but he doesn't let me talk to him unless he contacts me first now. I hate waiting for it because he's so busy, or he claims to be. My feelings are so strong, and they're not going away anytime soon. I can't let him go even though I'm not happy with how he treats me... and the feelings may never be reciprocated. I have accepted that I'm emotionally attached. I miss him so much right now, haven't talked to him in days because it's not what he wants. He says he will contact me, but it's usually too long of a wait for me. I don't know how to change things.
We're both guys btw. I'm 20 and he's 47.
Any advice on what should I do? And what are your views on ****buddies? Have you ever had one, and how did it go?