|
Mikal's 20s: Albums, Songs, Videos and Hateration
ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 9/24/2001
Posts: 10,763
|
Mikal's 20s: Albums, Songs, Videos and Hateration
^_^
Over this New Years Week, I shall post my picks for the twenty best albums, songs and videos as well as the twenty worst songs and videos of the year.
Not saying when Just expect a chart daily ^_^
|
|
|
ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 10/1/2002
Posts: 14,726
|
|
|
|
Member Since: 4/30/2002
Posts: 3,522
|
i love when people do their worst's. can't wait to see that
|
|
|
ATRL Moderator
Member Since: 2/19/2003
Posts: 34,484
|
I will support this! Go look at my list please (YOU TOO CHRIS).
BTW Mikal, it looks like Kong might be dead for Picture. But I'm still keeping hope alive!
|
|
|
ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 9/24/2001
Posts: 10,763
|
Well, I still say Munich is dead, so why not Kong
Anyways, I shall begin with a bad list
Top 20 Worst Videos Of The Year
20 Ashlee Simpson - L.O.V.E.
Why Bad - Lamest house party, decent into Courtney Love
OK, so Asslee takes a funny Dane Cook joke (about how women just want to dance, in a circle, around their bags and shoes) and makes it lame as sin by looking insanely drunk and heading off to the worst house party I've ever seen - and Laramie has some horrid house parties.
19 Destiny's Child - Cater 2 U
Why Bad - Needless use of nudity, bad dancing
Destiny's Child began to regress this year, from Independent Women to happy little slave housewives with this song. The video, however, makes the song even more annoying for is it necessary to see Kelly preen around a car or watch them in their horrid weaves look demure while nekkid? Seems more like a final ploy for attention to me.
18 Ludacris - Number 1 Spot
Why Bad - Lame parody
Luda Luda Luda...*shakes head* you are a thousand times better than this video. Why pander by using a sample from Austin Powers and then making all three films over in a 3 minute span? Woman who can't blink, Mini-Me in a 'fro, you dressed like Goldfromember? Bad all over.
17 Lindsay Lohan - Confessions Of A Broken Heart
Why Bad - Overdramatic caterwaling
See, I like this video but even I know it's trash. Overtramatized Lindsay being all ravaged and smeary makeup while PretendDad and PretendMom fight in front of some flexible windows.
16 Green Day - Wake Me Up When September Ends
Why Bad - Making a song about loosing a dad all about Anit War.
Green Day had me at "American Idiot." They lost me with this mess of a video. From Billie Joe looking like a gothic chipmunk to James Bell and Evan Rachel Wood being all overly dramatic over french fries to the Iraq makeup. Look, yay poinantcy and all that, but the last thing you should do is hit us with a sledgehammer with it.
15 Gwen Stefani - Luxurious
Why Bad - New sources to steal from.
Gwen loves stealing. She stole bindis, Aviator locks, Japanese women, Alice in Wonderland, Madonna, Pirates, High School and the glamness of the 50s. Now Gwen has went bonkers and thinks shecan be just as Chula as the next lady on the block. But between the dumbass makeup, the awful mess she makes with the sample, the Cha-Chings, the pinata forest and Gwen dressed like Frida Kahlo it makes me want to shove an independent thought into her skull.
14 Beyonce - Check On It
Why Bad - Sasha Attacks!
Beyonce...or should I say Sasha...what the hell is wrong with you. First you have two horrid videos with the other two, then you make a horrid song that makes women out to be asses with legs, then you make a mess of a video showing your ass in a multitude of outfits and poses that, as Ed the Sock showed back in 2003, you SAID you were too classy to do. Either go all ho or knock it off.
13 Kelly Clarkson - Because Of You
Why Bad - More overraught acting.
Women with Daddy Problems, Part 2. Now Kelly walks through the looking glass and sees MiniKelly chase down daddy while a different Kelly (another recurring theme this year) whines in a hall of mirrors. I hate this song like crazy, and this video just made me mad. Which is why it's higher up than Lindsay WhoCan'tSing.
12 Rob Thomas - Lonely No More
Why Bad - Bad CGI, Worse Crotch Shots
Rob wants to make a name for himself. Well, he didn't here. Cuz all I could tell is he has a great ass and he wants to show us his ****. Meanwhile the rotatig furniture of CGIland made the video just one weird mess.
11 Mariah Carey - We Belong Together
Why bad - Hysterical Mimi.
The Singing *** came back strong with what, in all reality, is not that bad of a song. However, when you wear your old wedding dress in order to stick it to a man you divorced a decade ago I just want to shake you. Stop reliving your marriage to Tommy, damn it!
10 50 Cent f. Olivia - Candy Shop
Why Bad - Just your basic mysocgeny.
50 hates women, methinks, since this and every other video he has ever done involves big-tittied women posing and pusing the limits of lipstick lesbianism while he struts around like a dumbass rooster. And then he made Olivia look like a tranny. Bad 50!
09 Eminem - Ass Like That
Why Bad - Lame As Hell
Em has lost it, since now he's attacking A PUPPET! Sure, he used Triumph the Comic Dog in the video but all this was is, basically, an attack against a puppet for getting in his face the year he wanted to fight Moby. And then, for dumbassness, he shoves his face in some woman's ass. Time to retire!
08 50 Cent - Just A Little Bit
Why Bad - ZZZ
OK, he's still using women as eye candy (like Beyonce praises in her song) but then goes all lame with that "plot line" over saving the ho from her Mexican man.
07 50 Cent - Disco Inferno
Why Bad - ****!
I love his song. I love me some ****. But don't mix the two.
06 Hilary Duff - Wake Up
Why Bad - Attack Of The Teeth!
Hil shoulda waited until her mouth didn't rival competitors in the Kentucky Derby before making this video. Chompers attacked New York and London and Paris and Tokyo with stereotypical costuming and moronic dancing included. Bad teeth!
05 Lindsay Lohan - First
Why Bad - A car hit on her.
Lindsay goes blonde, tries to look rock, gets hit on by Herbie with a car door on her ass. The end (of her singing career, perhaps?)
04 Madonna - Hung Up
Why Bad - Jazzercizing Grandma kicks it with some DDR.
Ya'll know I hate this video, even if the song grew on me to be one of my favorites. But when Madonna is shaking her 47-year-old ass out of some outfit while Jazzercizing in heels, krumping, people traveling from Compton to London by magic car and then she does her DDR dancing (badly) while teaching Tae-Bo, she coulda been a #1 contender.
03 Simple Plan - Untitled
Why Bad - More Overraught emotions
Dear "rock" bands - stop casting people who cannot act on cue to act out all tramatic and dead and ****. Lord, this video was lame.
02 R.Kelly - Trapped In The Closet (Every Part)
Why Bad - Have you seen it?
Ok, do I have to describe how dumb these videos are? From random cheating to gay pastors to cops to cheating wives to spatulas to cousions being shot to pie to midgits it's the weirdest series ever.
01 Jessica Simpson - These Boots Are Made For Walking.
Why Bad - The Angry Tranny Goes Even Dumber
Heh. You know I was having this at #1. The Angry Tranny and CreepyPa thought it would be cool to show Jessica's inabilty to dance, her lack of an ass (seriously, her legs just run into her back with no ass to speak of), and her sudden loss of singing talent to America. How anyone bought this as anything other than laughably bad confuses me.
And that is indeed the worst videos of the yera. Feel free to discuss
|
|
|
Member Since: 8/9/2004
Posts: 21,889
|
aren't you the one who made the awesome avatar for WBT? "I don't know how someone spends the time on something he doesn't like??!"
I agree with you on the rest except that C2U & WBT are on the top of my video countdown .
|
|
|
Member Since: 4/30/2002
Posts: 3,522
|
|
|
|
ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 9/24/2001
Posts: 10,763
|
LOVE, someone had asked for me to make them, and I was nice and made it
|
|
|
ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 6/9/2002
Posts: 6,789
|
wake me up for september ends should be #1
one of the worst videos I have ever seen.
|
|
|
ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 9/26/2001
Posts: 22,475
|
Nah, #1 should be Ass Like That, even with Triumph in it.
But that was funny as hell and I can't wait to see what else is in store.
|
|
|
ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 9/24/2001
Posts: 10,763
|
20 Worst Songs Of The Year
20 Pussycat Dolls - Stickwitu
You honestly expect me to buy this slockfest of a song that even Mariah would think otherwise to release (and she loves her slocky ballads) to follow Dontcha? Bitches please, I highly doubt you'll stick with the man you just stole from some poor ole girl in the last song.
19 Shakira - Don't Bother
Heh, I know this song is making a lot of top song lists, but this song drievs me bonkers. It's not higher, even with her singing about a woman being "fat free" like she's Jell-o or some ****, because English is not her first language but all the random lyrics should have been worked out back on Laundry Service.
18 Britney Spears - Someday (I Will Understand)
Did you miss her not having a worst video? Well, her newest attempt at poignancy (last seen in "Everytime") is just as one-note and irksome as her last try at emotion and ballad-singing. And yet, she sounds better than a lot of the ballads released this year. Scary!
17 Destiny's Child - Cater 2 U
My hate of this song is well known, since first hearing the chorus last year and demaning my parents not to buy me that travesty of an album called "Destiny Fulfilled." Instead of inspiring women to continue to make way against males or calling for camaraderie against the sexes, Beyonce and Pals go off about how THEY need to look fly and cook and clean and wash all for their man. Did Jay-Z smack the hell out of Beyonce when she put her foot down, causing this recent outbreak of women-in-their-place-as-accessories that the girls basically sang about?
16 Chris Brown - Run It
Can't decide if this is the worst #1 in a long line of horrible #1 singles this year (seriously, it was a bad year at the top). Such a bland song from a guy who's vocal talents rival's R Kelly's in annoyance.
15 David Banner - Play
Play or whatever it's called might be the most vile song of the year. It passed "Candy Shop" way back and ran circles over "Wait" (which I love, showing I have weird ass tastes). And I'm not talking the mild version where girls do sit ups for this moron's enjoyment. Try the actual song and don't stop 'til it's over. Can a rapper PLEASE rap a song that doesn't degrade women down to some vagina with limbs?
14 Britney Spears - Do Somethin' (and Mona Lisa)
ML would be much, much, much higher except Jive wisely killed it's chances of being released. So, here it is with Britney's other rather obnoxious song. I'm not sure even she knows what she is talking about in this song, and she soulds like she's bored and ready to get plowed by Kevin again during the whole thing. And lets not discuss the hilareoty of CrackedOutBritney in the video.
13 Beyonce f. Whatever Rapper She Blew - Check On It
As I posted yesterday, Beyonce McSasha has lowered women to just being an ass with legs. And she's uterly thrilled, byt the sounds of it. And the rap by...someone I could care less to recall is on par with "Ya'll Ain't Ready" for worst minute of rapping in the history of the game. Beyonce, time to rest your ass and fire daddy. And grow that brain back.
12 Paul Wall - Sitting Sideways
He looks like a retarded version of Bubba Sparks, has a scary as hell mouth and raps worse than Mike Jones. What the hell is this song even about, cuz if it's just about him cruizing and hitting on women his scuzzy ass could never get back in reality it's time for Hip Hop to pack it in and call it a day.
11 Lil' Kim - Lighters Up
Dear Kim: YOUR ASS LIED ON THE STAND WILLINGLY. THAT'S WHY YOUR DUMBASS AND HUGE CHIN IS IN JAIL. Get over it, stop pretending you're Jamacian and rap about something you know, like being a ho. At least I can believe that from you.
10 Hilary Duff - Wake Up
No, I will not wake up, especially if your off key warbleing is streaming at me. The lyrics cross between her being a Survivor because Lindsay hates her and her needing a drink. Either way, she's too wholesome and too horse-like now and too infested with Good Charlotte **** for me to buy this song as anything more as trivial Disneyfied trash.
09 50 Cent f. Olivia - Candy Shop
Ok, I admit I love "Disco Inferno." Hell, I love lot of rap that basically makes women out to be nothing but sexbots. Yeah, I'm a hypocrite. But what makes this song 50's worst is both the title and his boredom at rapping about hos and candy and thongs and ****. Besides, Olivia kicked all ass with "Bizounce" years ago and should not be forced to play hook girl to your ass.
08 Gwen Stefani f. Eve - Rich Girl
Eve saves this song in many ways just by rapping and making it clear she's marketing clothes. But Gwen, who stole Fiddler on the Roof for this ode to being a gold digger, names her Harajuku Slave Dolls and sings in that never-the-right-key-but-really-high-above-it style we love so well that she loves cash. A theme she covers two songs ahead.
07 Ashlee Simpson - L.O.V.E.
Worst idea for a song. Horrible try at making it sond rockish by shouting at the top of your lungs. And "ello" makes you sound like a English gent greeting the morning milkman as you go off to play on the polo grounds.
06 Gwen Stefani - Luxurious
Well, let's steal an Isley Brothers melody that is more well known from the Notorious BIG and sing about how much you love cash. We get it Gwen, you have money and are as fake as the personas you try to adapt. And stop with the "ka-ching"ing, since all it does is rile up Shania Twain fans into thinking you stole her song.
(oh, and Me and Ryan v. Musicfanreturns/Shaniafan should be crowned best fight of the year. Bar none.)
05 The Game f. 50 Cent - Hate It Or Love It
Hate It. One name drops, the other can't rap. Guess which one is which!
04 Hilary Duff - Beat Of My Heart
Is there another line to this damn trap of music cancer besides "beat of my heart"? That's all you hear throughout the song, as if her heart is screaming "beat" at a constant rate for no reason. Hil, fire your song picker now!
03 Eminem - Ass Like That
There's two plotlines in this song, and unlike plenty of British artists who can jam a thousand different hooks into a song (see Ferdinand, Franz; Aloud, Girls) and make it work...he can't. Either rap about how you love sticking your face in big asses or rap comedically about how you love to make fun of celebs. Weird Al for a younger generation rears it;s head (pun definitly intended) in this hodgepodge of crap.
02 Jessica Simpson - These Boots Are Made For Walking.
No double for the Angry Tranny. All she did is make me hate God for letting musical artists be allowed to cover classic songs and crap all over them with their breathy affected singing and having to ask "for a handclap." I hope her boots walk over her.
01 R.Kelly - Trapped In The Closet (Every Damn Song In The Series)
It starts out lame, about being caught by a hubby after he looks for the man ****ing his wife in a dresser drawer. It ends with a well-hung midget farting and another wife admiting to being preggers with the kid. Inbetween is a mess of random characters, confusing plotlines and stupid as hell rhymes. Oh, and a need to shout people's names out constantly. R should be hit with a hammer for this nonsense.
|
|
|
ATRL Moderator
Member Since: 12/21/2002
Posts: 20,569
|
LMAO. That's f‘cking great. ^____^
|
|
|
Member Since: 7/27/2005
Posts: 1,929
|
L.O.V.E video should be higher
|
|
|
ATRL Moderator
Member Since: 2/19/2003
Posts: 34,484
|
Quote:
Originally posted by Mikal
20 Worst Songs Of The Year
20 Pussycat Dolls - Stickwitu
You honestly expect me to buy this slockfest of a song that even Mariah would think otherwise to release (and she loves her slocky ballads) to follow Dontcha? Bitches please, I highly doubt you'll stick with the man you just stole from some poor ole girl in the last song.
13 Beyonce f. Whatever Rapper She Blew - Check On It
As I posted yesterday, Beyonce McSasha has lowered women to just being an ass with legs. And she's uterly thrilled, byt the sounds of it. And the rap by...someone I could care less to recall is on par with "Ya'll Ain't Ready" for worst minute of rapping in the history of the game. Beyonce, time to rest your ass and fire daddy. And grow that brain back.
11 Lil' Kim - Lighters Up
Dear Kim: YOUR ASS LIED ON THE STAND WILLINGLY. THAT'S WHY YOUR DUMBASS AND HUGE CHIN IS IN JAIL. Get over it, stop pretending you're Jamacian and rap about something you know, like being a ho. At least I can believe that from you.
10 Hilary Duff - Wake Up
No, I will not wake up, especially if your off key warbleing is streaming at me. The lyrics cross between her being a Survivor because Lindsay hates her and her needing a drink. Either way, she's too wholesome and too horse-like now and too infested with Good Charlotte **** for me to buy this song as anything more as trivial Disneyfied trash.
07 Ashlee Simpson - L.O.V.E.
Worst idea for a song. Horrible try at making it sond rockish by shouting at the top of your lungs. And "ello" makes you sound like a English gent greeting the morning milkman as you go off to play on the polo grounds.
06 Gwen Stefani - Luxurious
Well, let's steal an Isley Brothers melody that is more well known from the Notorious BIG and sing about how much you love cash. We get it Gwen, you have money and are as fake as the personas you try to adapt. And stop with the "ka-ching"ing, since all it does is rile up Shania Twain fans into thinking you stole her song.
`
05 The Game f. 50 Cent - Hate It Or Love It
Hate It. One name drops, the other can't rap. Guess which one is which!
04 Hilary Duff - Beat Of My Heart
Is there another line to this damn trap of music cancer besides "beat of my heart"? That's all you hear throughout the song, as if her heart is screaming "beat" at a constant rate for no reason. Hil, fire your song picker now!
|
These are all on my Top 100 list. You = hater? STOP HATING DAMMIT. HATER.
|
|
|
ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 6/9/2002
Posts: 6,789
|
disagree with 15, 12, and 5, but others are right.
|
|
|
ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 9/24/2001
Posts: 10,763
|
Now, with even more controversy...
Top 20 Albums Of The Year
20 Weezer - Make Believe
I don't think this is their best album (that would be the Blue Album, personally) but Weezer made a rather coheisive album that worked well and showed some actual growth (rather than becomming too dependent )
Keepers - We Are All On Drugs, Perfect Situation, Freak Me Out
19 Robbie Williams - Intensive Care
I'm pretty sure I'm one of the morons who, if Robbie released an album of him just farting "God Save The Queen" it would still make my top 20. Yeah, I love me some Robbie. But in his ode-to-the-80s Intensive Care album, Robbie starts to finally work on the problems every album he's ever released has had: he can't make up his mind what he want to be. Now he's shifting more towards reflective ballads and swearing a lot. And we need more of that.
Keepers - Ghosts, Your Gay Friend, Advertising Space
18 Oasis - Don't Believe The Truth
I think a lot of people forgot about this album during the year since "Lyla" went nowhere. However, the Band That Played Beatles finally grew up and tried being The Band That Played The Stones. And the results were by far their strongest work in a long damn time. Their most Stone-sounding song "The Meaning Of Stone" gave the boys some power chords to test while "Part Of The Queue" showed just how awesome they could be with a ballad, which people might forget since they had to go and release that lame-as-hell "Let There Be Love" which could be their most Beatles-sounding song ever.
Keepers - Guess God Thinks I'm Abel, Part Of The Queue, Lyla, The Meaning Of Soul
17 The Rakes - Capture/Release
Yeah, I like British Music a lot. Sorry folks. Now, this album that no one has heard of is an eclectic mix that travels the line that Franz crafted, but strays closwer to the rock edge than the boys from Scotland have managed. C/R is more simplistic in melody, which makes it rather unusual for a British work in which the norm is to cram as much sound into a song to constantly make it new. This more stripped down sound works well on the rather catchy "22 Grand Job," which laments the fact that a guy making 28 wants the same girl you want...and you only make 22. "Biotic Love" uses ciruits and robot imagry to define the relationship between friends who want more, while "Release" is just a mess and a joy to listen to. Definitly worth a listen.
Keepers Release, Strausberg, 22 Grand Job
16 Gorillaz - Demon Days
I thought they could not do better than the genious that is "Clint Eastwood" and was skepical at first of "Feel Good Inc." (except for De La Soul, who are always awesome). However, the album is definitly a gere-flopping mix that slides easily between dance, rap, rock and pop and that's clearly evident in the singles, which eaily are the strongest work on this mix. While "White Lights" (****, is that the name) is a gorgeous sounding ear blast, nothing eally can match the crazy joy that a song like "DARE" can bring.
Keepers Dare, Dirty Harry
15 Gary Allan - Tough All Over
We should call this the year Mikal rediscovered what Country can and should do. Gary's album echos the tragic heartbreak he suffered when is wife of 3 years committed suicide a year or so back. Rather than promote his last one, he went back and created this opus t his pain. And this is indeed a hard one to listen to. "Nickeljack Cave" calls forth the essence of Johnny Cash while "I Just Got Back From Hell" and "Ring Ring" create interesting mixing between his life and if any other country singer (probably Brad Paisley, since he gets what a song is about) had done them. By also writing four of his songs, Allan expresses his pain while contributing to a rise in singer-songwriters so needed in country music today.
Keepers I Just Got Back From Hell, Ring Ring, Nickeljack Cave
14 Garbage - Bleed Like Me
Their last set (perhaps...) is definitly Version 2.0 on acid, as the band grab their guitars and rock the hell out of sex and fighting, two common themes interwoven in the album. Shirley Manson, who is by far one of the best vocalists of this generation, shows the melancohly in "Bleed Like Me" and "Metal Heart" while being more sex kitten and a tease for "Bad Boyfriend" and "Sex Is Not The Enemy" and strikers out in songs like "Run Baby Run" and "Boys wanna Fight." Shirley and the boys made a booming note to love and hate on this mix of tracks.
Keepers Metal Heart, Bleed Like Me, Bad Boyfriend, Boys Wanna Fight
13 The Darkness - One Way Ticket To Hell...And Back
Why do I love British rock? There's always a sense of humor and fun underneath, even in the most serious of acts. It's not like American rock, where everything must be louder, more insane, more politics, bigger than hell, and as serious as possible. Yes, The Darkness is not a serious band by any sense of the word, but I had to say that somewhere. Anyways, on their sophmore effort the boys with the 70s **** hair found some pan pipes, a Casio and an old sound-making toy gun, got even more falsetto and rock a hell of a lot harder than most US-based bands do. Give me "English Country Garden" and "Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time" or give me death!
Keepers - Dinner Lady Arms, Knockers, Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time
12 Nickel Creek - Why Should This Fire Die
Bluegrass went more innovative with my favorite set of fiddlers this year. Of course ditching the wonderful Alison Krauss helps in development. The Cali kids went more alt-country with this set, tightening up harmonies and giving the guitair, mandolin and fiddle/violin more virile and attitude on tracks like "Scotch and Chocolate" (yay instrumentals) and "Helena" (not THAT Helena...though that would be cool). "When In Rome" showed their own growth as vocalists as well as interpreters of music, while "Can't Complain" and "Best Of Luck" lets the trio snarl and throw piss around like the best of them. And when the cute little Sarah shows bite, you know that the band has done something good. (Sorry Chris and Sean, we knew you had some swagger too!)
Keepers - Can't Complain, Best of Luck, Scotch and Chocolate
11 Beck - Guero
As long as Beck keeps his comments about Scientology quiet, I shall never desert. He went backwards on this album, giving is a slightly dated feel that make the album as a whole more cohesive and sound rather excellent. "Girl" may be a bord fave, but his go on "Black Tambourine" shows to me why Beck is such an awesome singer and how well he can give any song a slinky and sorta nasty feel if he chooses too. Now, less L.Ron commentary in those trippy videos, if you can.
Keepers Black Tambourine, E-Pro, Girl, Hell Yeah
10 The Bravery - The Bravery
I love this New Nerw Wave Dance Rock that's come out in the last year, and this one's all for the fauxhawks. Sam and the boys combined 80s synth, 70s vibes (on the excellent "Public Service Announcment") and 90s cool to an album that never could make up its mind if it was rock or dance. Straying the line are definite class acts like "An Honest Mistake" and "The Ring Song" while treading towards dance on PSA and back on the rock end with "No Brakes." An excellent debut.
Keepers - PSA, Fearless, No Breakes, The Ring Song
09 nine inch nails - with teeth
Yeah, I have this rather high in comparison to others on this board, but for good reason. The guy who said he wanted to **** you like an animal finally grew up into the man who still plans on ****ing you like an animal. with teeth shows Trent finally comming to terms and realizing he's not that young anymore and, while not as good as his early work, has enough stamia thanks to traks like "Only" and "All The Love In The World" to stand on its own. He's rather melancholy, yes, but he always sings with a hint that the rage he built for so long on so many songs is still there, but only willing to let it out when it strikes him to.
Keepers Only, All The Love In The World, Getting Smaller, Every Day Is Exactly The Same
08 Miranda Lambert - Kerosene
Look Ma! An actual country album. Miranda steered far the hell away from her contemporaries on her shiny ebut, kicking ass and taking names on "Kerosene" while showing country purist tendencies on "I Can't Be Bothered" and "I Wanna Die." Yes yes, "Me And Charlie Talkin'" is a tad silly and slocky, but it's one of the best country songs released this year when women (with one minor exception) had to play either Wiskey Girl or Moron Belter to get noticed.
Keepers - Kerosene, I Wanna Die, Love Your Memory
07 The Go Team - Thunder Lightning Strike
What a rather loud album. Mixing who knows how many samples (over 100 for certain) the sixtet makes enjoyable traks that stretch what music should sound like. And when Ninja goes solo, she's kicking your ass with her killer cheers and her nifty singing voice.
Keepers Ladybot, Bottle Rockets
06 Girls Aloud - Chemistry
Stretching any credibility I have to the breaking point, I present to you THE BEST pop album of the year. Bar none. Not Madonna, not Robbie, not Asslee, not anyone. Britney needs to get on her knees (or stay there after blowing Kevin) and thank God that Xenomania agreed to work with her, for this is a master class in what pop can be. It's a concept album that's either a retro girlgroup gone wild or London ladies hitting the clubs, but either way the album sparkles with pop tracks that cram three or four melodies into in, songs with just choruses (the rather brill "Watch Me Go") or really late choruses (like, 2 minutes til the chorus in "Biology"). With Nadine's balnd as hell bossanova-tinged "No Regrets" being the only lame track here, the Girls have been handed an excellent album and exceeded even the most hardened critics' views on them. Not bad for a tv creation!
Keepers Biology, Whole Lotta History, Watch Me Go, Wild Horses, Swinging London Town
05 Bloc Party - Silent Alarm
Yet another genre-skipping album, Bloc Party mesh dance and rock into a rather cold-sounding mesh of heavy riffs and crazy singing. "Banquet" is the tip of the iceberg for this group, who's guitar work is impressive on tracks like "Price of Gas" and "Helicopter" while even ballas like "She's Hearing Voices" and "This Modern Life" never detract from the feel of the album. Better than Kaiser Cheifs (their "rivals" to take the BritRock crown from Franz) and one of the more underappreciated albums this year.
Keepers - Price Of Gas, This Modern Life, Banquet
04 The White Stripes - Get Behind Me, Satan
Like everyone else, I was underwhelmed at first. I mean really, "Elephant" is this brilliant rock album that took soul and blues to new heights how can you not? But the pepermint band figured how to make a rock album even more soul-enhanced with this one. "Blue Orchid" is a rather misleading lead track, as the album ternds to be heavier with richer guitar work from Jack and more stirring melodies and lyrics. Maybe better than "Elephan," maybe not, but either way GBMS is a deserving and brill album in its own right.
Keepers - My Doorbell, The Denial Twist, The Nurse, Little Ghost
03 Franz Ferdinand - You Could Have It So Much Better With Franz Ferdinand
Ya know, it's hard to make a second album. It's hard to find enough tracks to make a Greatest Hits album. It's hard to defy everyones expectations constantly. But Franz never broke a sweat in creating a skip-free album that is both better than their debut and could easily be a GH album for them. From "The Fallen" to "Outsiders," the boys create a more heavy word, taking darker themes (such as "Elenaor..." and "Walk Away") with their still everpresent playful side (like "Your The Reason I'm Leaving" and the title track) to their sexual abiguity and ever present need to make out with guys (killer lead single "Do You Want To" and "This Boy"). I would dare them to surpass this album with their next release, but why? We know they will.
Keepers Walk Away, The Fallen, Outsiders, This Boy, You're The Reason I'm Leaving
02 Fiona Apple - Extraoridinary Machine
Fiona fooled us all! But enough about that. Fiona knows how to make a song, how to sell a song and how to make you fall in love with it, even if she hates you. A brilliant collection that should easily capture Best Pop Album (love ya Kels, but she whopped ya ass here) Fiona interlinks despair, hate, love and confusion as only she can. But, unlike Tidal and When The Pawn... the anger simmers and cools under the melodies.
Keppers Tymps (The Sick In The Head Song), Window, Get Him Back, Better Version Of Me
and the #1...
which will make Ke go =-o
....
01 M.I.A. - Arular
Ok, I saw the video for "Bucky Done Gun" and was confused as to how I had never heard of her. After getting the musical tracks from the Most Awesome Ke, I discovered I was missing out on the most brilliant album this year. Without question, M.I.A. lays out messages of love, hate, terror, villiany and sex without thinking to keep them seperate in beats that flow from Baltimore to London to Jamacia to the favelas of brazil (mark my words, Baile beats will surpass reggaeton this year as the music of the summer, as reggaeton did to the coolie riddim). Sex and fear link up in "Amazon" where she sleeps with her kidnappers, sex and pride echo out in the ****ing hot as hell "10 Dollar," war and poverty echoes throughout "Galang," "Pull Up The People" and "Bucky Done Gun" while the battle over the sexes have it out in "U.R.A.Q.T." She sings of home in "Sunshowers" and it becomes clear when she finishes her opus that she's mastered skills and insights people wish they could.
Keepers 10 Dollar, Hombre, Galang, Pull Up The People, U.R.A.Q.T., M.I.A.
|
|
|
|
Quote:
Originally posted by Mikal
20 Worst Songs Of The Year
18 Britney Spears - Someday (I Will Understand)
Did you miss her not having a worst video? Well, her newest attempt at poignancy (last seen in "Everytime") is just as one-note and irksome as her last try at emotion and ballad-singing. And yet, she sounds better than a lot of the ballads released this year. Scary!
15 David Banner - Play
Play or whatever it's called might be the most vile song of the year. It passed "Candy Shop" way back and ran circles over "Wait" (which I love, showing I have weird ass tastes). And I'm not talking the mild version where girls do sit ups for this moron's enjoyment. Try the actual song and don't stop 'til it's over. Can a rapper PLEASE rap a song that doesn't degrade women down to some vagina with limbs?
14 Britney Spears - Do Somethin' (and Mona Lisa)
ML would be much, much, much higher except Jive wisely killed it's chances of being released. So, here it is with Britney's other rather obnoxious song. I'm not sure even she knows what she is talking about in this song, and she soulds like she's bored and ready to get plowed by Kevin again during the whole thing. And lets not discuss the hilareoty of CrackedOutBritney in the video.
13 Beyonce f. Whatever Rapper She Blew - Check On It
As I posted yesterday, Beyonce McSasha has lowered women to just being an ass with legs. And she's uterly thrilled, byt the sounds of it. And the rap by...someone I could care less to recall is on par with "Ya'll Ain't Ready" for worst minute of rapping in the history of the game. Beyonce, time to rest your ass and fire daddy. And grow that brain back.
11 Lil' Kim - Lighters Up
Dear Kim: YOUR ASS LIED ON THE STAND WILLINGLY. THAT'S WHY YOUR DUMBASS AND HUGE CHIN IS IN JAIL. Get over it, stop pretending you're Jamacian and rap about something you know, like being a ho. At least I can believe that from you.
09 50 Cent f. Olivia - Candy Shop
Ok, I admit I love "Disco Inferno." Hell, I love lot of rap that basically makes women out to be nothing but sexbots. Yeah, I'm a hypocrite. But what makes this song 50's worst is both the title and his boredom at rapping about hos and candy and thongs and ****. Besides, Olivia kicked all ass with "Bizounce" years ago and should not be forced to play hook girl to your ass.
08 Gwen Stefani f. Eve - Rich Girl
Eve saves this song in many ways just by rapping and making it clear she's marketing clothes. But Gwen, who stole Fiddler on the Roof for this ode to being a gold digger, names her Harajuku Slave Dolls and sings in that never-the-right-key-but-really-high-above-it style we love so well that she loves cash. A theme she covers two songs ahead.
03 Eminem - Ass Like That
There's two plotlines in this song, and unlike plenty of British artists who can jam a thousand different hooks into a song (see Ferdinand, Franz; Aloud, Girls) and make it work...he can't. Either rap about how you love sticking your face in big asses or rap comedically about how you love to make fun of celebs. Weird Al for a younger generation rears it;s head (pun definitly intended) in this hodgepodge of crap.
02 Jessica Simpson - These Boots Are Made For Walking.
No double for the Angry Tranny. All she did is make me hate God for letting musical artists be allowed to cover classic songs and crap all over them with their breathy affected singing and having to ask "for a handclap." I hope her boots walk over her.
|
All these I agree with you on, especially the crapfest known as ...Like That, Boots and Do Something. I do not agree with Hilary being on this worst of...list at all, but you have always had problems with her so I understand why she's on it.
As far as R. Kelly being #1 on the worst of list, I'm so-so with it.
|
|
|
Member Since: 4/30/2002
Posts: 3,522
|
Mikal, have you ever considered becoming a journalist major? (Sorry, if you are one already :x). I just think your writeups are really good!
|
|
|
ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 12/29/2003
Posts: 6,311
|
=-o indeed!
Dude, you are peanuts awesome. Your worst songs and videos list seem moderately accurate (I was somewhat upset not to see My Humps, haha, and Wake Me Up When September Ends so low) but you made up for that by having an awesome top 20 albums list. Seriously, you even got Nickle Creek (want to send the album to me sometime? ) and of course, M.I.A.!! Great insane taste man, and I really agree with you on the tracks you chose for M.I.A.'s album (then again, why wouldn't I seeing she does indeed kick major ass). I just haven't heard five albums on that list and so that is why you are just "peanuts awesome" instead of "cashews awesome", haha. I'll kill my "huge" post now.
|
|
|
ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 10/1/2002
Posts: 14,726
|
MIA, Franz, Bloc, Bravery, Gorillaz, Oasis, Weez!
Solid albums.
|
|
|
|
|