You stroll into a bar, looking around for a seat. The place is mostly full, but you're able to find a spot. Ordering a favorite drink, you stare at the TV, and admire the display behind the counter.

All is going well until...
Some douche bag down the table heckles on you for some reason from moment one. He starts throwing explicit words and names at you. The bartenders are busy tending to some bratty underage frat + sorority kids elsewhere in the building....

You simply look away from your drink, and suddenly...



Your $5 drink gets splattered across the counter.

It is on.

This d-bag and his creature-lookin friends start coming/stomping to you....

There's about to be a rumble.

Suddenly, you here from a nearby booth...

"Hey douchebag! Leave 'em alone!"


You suddenly feel empowered and psyched... you got four of your favorite celebrities about to help you kick some @$$!


WHO ARE THOSE FOUR CELEBRITIES THAT COME TO YOUR DEFENSE?

Pixie Lott & Rihanna to make me look like a pimp
Eminem and Kanye to cut a bitch.

Nicki Minaj, Beyone, Christina Aguilera, and Keri

Nicki Can ass bump them back to where they came from. Beyonce can stomp on them with those sexy ass legs, Xtina will pierce them eardrums with her amazing vocals and keri is going to get up in there grill

I think Nicki Minaj could be quite the asset.

Rihanna we need the good bitch to **** up the bastard up.
Enrique Iglesiais We need his to rip that sexy top off, and bash that shitwhole.
Taylor momson she can attack the girls on Gossip girl, she has the voice of the decade, im sure she can smash the bastards
Danny Madison (Steven Hyde) cause his a big boy who punches everybody and he would totally rock at it

Lady Gaga - to provide some fight music/inspiration
Pink / Brad Pitt - to cut some bitches
Kyle Gallner - for his sexiness

Nicki Minaj - could argue a storm.
Dwayne Johnson - no need to explain.
Betty White - no one dislikes her, she'd make them laugh a little.
Kanye West - don't mess with him.

Rihanna
Gaga
Xtina
Cheryl

Amerie
Ashanti
Kelly Rowland
Ciara

Because ya' know I can call them anytime because they got a lot of free time!

I don't need four, I only need P!nk and Rihanna.

Elly Jackson (of La Roux) - could cut a bitch with her hair
Nicki Minaj - she'd talk so fast, no one would know what was going on
Snooki - 'hold ma earrings'
random death metal singer - he'd scare them all

Chuck Norris, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jay-Z, and 50 Cent

Oprah Winfrey - Who would touch her?
Jason Stathem - Have you seen Crank?
Shannon Sharpe - Yes, this man can throw more than a football and sport opinions
Ke$ha - Have ya seen her glitter? SMOKESCREEN!!!

Ms. Tiffany "New York" Pollard
Yao Ming
Jackie Chan

and

Judge Judy

Tina Knowles
Sister Patterson
Mel Gibson
Vin Diesel

Lohan, Hilton, and Ke$ha. Only three, because they'd already be there at the bar. I don't have no time to spare.

Christian Bale and Mel Gibson.

I would have someone walk in Christian Bale's shot to piss him off.

And I'd have someone Jewish walk in front of Mel Gibson.

Then I'd unleash their combined fury on my aggressor.

THIS WOULD MAKE A HELL OF A TEAM.