Like, after you go on a date with someone and realise that you are not so into him, what do you do?

Today i had to be blatantly honest with a guy that i went on a date with, i felt sick to my
Stomach...

If i am not interested, i slowly disappear and change my attidute drastically when chatting but sometimes it's just not enough.. i know it's very cowardly and i should be straightforward but it's just too hard.. ( although that's usually the treatment myself gets from others )

I've definitely done both, and I mean rarely does anyone just disappear. Always just be honest, and never blame them. Just say something like "I enjoyed our date and it was great to meet you, but I didn't feel a spark / didn't feel we clicked / want to keep dating and meeting other people". That's all you need to say, not reasons or excuses, just an acknowledgement that you're not interest.

What not to do is to go guns blazing "you're too boring / too unambitious / too fat / too ugly / annoying / loud" etc.

Depends on the situation. If you met over Tinder/Grindr, ghosting is fairly acceptable. If they approached you in public you owe them honesty if they are hitting you up and you aren't feeling it.

Disappearing is, in my opinion, the worst thing you can do. EVERYBODY deserves a polite explanation or a simple cliche message, even if they were an asshole during the date. Besides, flat out saying what you feel is so much easier than hiding, avoiding calls etc and carries much less guilt, so it's a win win

I'm a ghoster it's so bad

UGH I got ghosted and it killed me. LMAO legit just tell me why.

THIS. Plus what's funny is people who ghost others, tend to complain about the quality of their dating experiences. As if it doesn't start with them and their poor communication skills.

Ghosting is not acceptable period and I side eye anyone who has dated for a while thinking that behavior is acceptable

I have only been in 2 terrible dates which ended up pretty bad but out of that if there's no chemistry between me and the guy we continue the date and part ways, I tend to become distance, no message and stuff so he forgets about my existence

I used to ghost because, in my mind, I thought I was doing the nice thing, but then it happened to me a few times and I learned my lesson. It hurts so much and it creates such terrible paranoia that can kind of ruin you for dating for some time

Although actually I still do it sometimes, just not intentionally: I'll try to think of the best way to break it to the guy and then I'll just forget he exists

Unfortunately I'm a ghoster Awful, I know.

Agreed.

Ghosting/blocking tbh

Exactly!

I've been dealing with this recently too and now I definitely prefer honesty. Just tell me "I'm seeing someone else" or something instead of leaving me hanging. And the kicker usually is that the guy tells you he's an honest person when he goes out with you, only to ghost on you months later.

The guy I went out with over the summer claimed to be such a honest person and said if his dates don't work out in the end, it's usually because the conversation fizzles out. Fast-forward a few months later - I realize that it's actually him who has poor communication skills and a lack of honesty. I can't with guys.

Only terrible people "ghost" .. I'm honest.

I think the worst part of ghosting is that it prevents any type of closure necessary to move on from the relationship. I (sort of) got ghosted a few weeks ago and I spent the next week or two analyzing every single encounter I had with the guy to figure what went wrong. Was it something I said? Did I make a bad first impression? Did he die? I racked my mind incessantly, only to finally realize I'll probably never find out exactly what happened, and I need to accept that and move on.

Even if his reason had been something like "you're ugly" or something else really harsh at least I would have know WHY he disappeared.

The sad thing is that I think a lot of ghosting happens because the guy is too worried about how the recipient will take it and wants to prevent any hurt feelings. But often it's the exact opposite that happens and the recipient is left more hurt and confused then if the ghoster had been honest in the first place.

This is kind of hilarious

Honestly is the best policy unless the dude is a creep or something. Literally don't leave the person you saw hanging. TELL THEM so they can move on as well. This happened to me so many times I never get it. One guy even told me why he basically didn't keep in touch a year later and it wasn't even an impolite reason, just pissed me off. Nothing wrong with a simple "sorry not interested anymore" especially if it only the first date or something.

I went to a movie with a guy once ( because I'm old school ) and the before-and-after period was so painfully awkward, he had no personality and no sense of humor. But I was a gentleman and did my best to hold up my end. Later we talked and I said that I didn't think the chemistry was quite right, but it had nothing to do with him. And he was like, "well we were watching a movie the whole time, we should do something again."

What I said to him in my head: "STOP EMBARRASSING YOURSELF."
What I said to him out loud: " Yeah, maybe we can figure something out "

And then we never did.

Thank God he didn't pursue the issue further, or else I might have caved just to be polite, and by now I'd be married to him... just to be polite.

I'd rather be ghosted. I can imagine he joined isis or something

If I'm not interested: I just don't answer or block.

If I have to ask for a picture of a guy and am not interested after seeing what he looks like: 95% of the time I'll just stop there. 5% of the time (if I feel bad for the guy) I'll say something like "thanks" and then never respond again.

If I'm still having a conversation with a guy and slowly become disinterested in him: Usually there's a point in the conversation where I get a good reason to duck out of it. Like if he lives with other people or doesn't drive etc.

There was one guy I dated and after 2 semi-awkward dates lost interest in him, and in that situation we had like one mini text conversation and afterwards I just stopped talking to him completely. Then blocked him lul

The times I have been honest with a guy usually do not go well. They will make a nasty comment about your appearance or personality or something.

On grindr I'm one of the better looking guys. It's rare that I get someone who says to me, "Not interested", but when I do I just assume it's someone

A.) Fugly (usually they are faceless + insecure),
B.) Fake, or
C.) Someone I've blocked/turned down before in the past who remembers me doing it to them

Ghosting is literally one of the worst things you can do. It literally makes you think what went wrong, especially when the person seemed really interested in you and even talked about going out again. It's not hard to be honest with someone and tell them how you feel. Just be real and say "Hey, you're really sweet guy/girl but I don't want to lead you on and this isn't going anywhere."

I hate hurting peoples feelings but I ALWAYS will give an explanation, whether it be in text or person. The only time I've "ghosted" is when I've told a guy I wasn't into him, multiple times, and he continuously would send texts even after the fact.