|
Discussion: Worst Breakup Experiences?
Member Since: 6/1/2011
Posts: 10,384
|
Quote:
Originally posted by Jackson
Lord my story is pretty messy
So there was this guy I was dating last year. We were young, in love, and gay, so naturally we moved way too fast into things and ended up moving in together after 3 months of dating. TBH that should have been the first warning sign but you do blind, stupid things when you're in love.
Another initial problem is that we were both extremely independent, especially me. Whenever things got stressful between us or in my personal life I would just go and work out or hike or be in nature for a few hours without telling anyone where I was going. And that's something I've always done and can't really be taken away from me because it's the only way I feel in control of my life. But that REALLY bothered him so whenever I would leave without telling him where I went he would lock the door on me.
The first real problems came when I "accidentally"  would read his text messages. I already had trust issues stemming from other relationships but this put it to a new level. He would text his friend in Washington that he didn't think we'd work out in the long run, or tell his friends about every little thing I did that irked him. Right there I should have known it was too late to save things but we kept things going for a few more months.
Now over the summer when we had first met we agreed to lay out all our issues in the open and be completely honest with each other. He told me about a married guy (married to another man) that he was friends with that he had ended up in bed with one time, but told me they didn't talk anymore and that it was one of his hugest regrets. So I was surprised to find him one day at home skyping and playing some video game with him. Immediately it was a red flag for me, but he told me everything was OK and even invited me to go stay at their place with him for a weekend, which I reluctantly agreed to do. It was fun, but when we got home I found a text on his phone to the affect of "it's OK, my husband didn't see anything". Being young and stupid it bothered me but I didn't say anything about it.
So the day after Christmas I went home to Colorado to visit family. A few days later I called my ex and he told me he had stayed over at the married guy's place one night. I told him that wasn't OK with me and he agreed to stop seeing him again. I was still super suspicious, so I logged into my ex's snapchat and posed as him until I got a confession out of the husband. I finally got what I wanted and flew back the next day. On the plane I was practically sobbing the whole way as I decided I was going to break up with him when I saw him. When my ex picked me up from the airport it was evident from my expression that he knew what was up. He had told me he wanted to greet me and kiss me when he saw me but we didn't even touch.
On the way home I finally confronted him. First I gave him an opportunity to confess, saying "Is there anything you want to tell me?" After he refused I finally said "I know you cheated on me". We were at a red light, and his head practically hit his hands on the steering wheel as he admitted defeat. We argued a little and after some kind of weird contortion of the truth I decided to hold off on breaking up a few more nights. It was New Year's Eve and we put on a show so we could host our party. But a few days later we finally called it quits.
After that I've only seen him once, although I did catfish him 2-3 times on grindr because I both missed him and wanted him to suffer  . I haven't seen him since February and never want to again tbh because he's a POS and I've been over him since mid-February but he also has my bike and owes me about $500 so I might have to  And that was probably longer than it needed to be nn
|
you know what... 
|
|
|
Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 3,578
|
Quote:
Originally posted by AALIYAH DANA
Did he ever apologize for leading you own and basically making you the sidechick? And yeah long distance relationships rarely work. I can understand if you've been with someone for a long time and than he had to move away, but y'all wanted to try long distance relationship. I think it can work. But starting a relationship off long distance  nah. Guys always talking about having "needs" and if they can't get them from you they cheat 
|
nope he didn't
when everything went down I was in Houston and he was in Cali
he just yelled at me and then blocked me on everything
there was never an apology
|
|
|
Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 430
|
I was 19 and was in a relationship with this guy for a year already. So, on that very day, I was in a concert with my friend, who had brought his new friend along. I called my boyfriend and asked if he wanna go and joined us, telling him who I was with. He refused, saying he was busy and stuff. And I noticed the new friend kept staring at me weirdly during the whole call.
Couple of days later, my boyfriend confessed that he had a summer crush on someone. And that someone is the new friend I had been with at the concert. He admitted they had never had sex or anything, but they did kiss, and that was all. He said it wouldnt have worked out, since the guy was only here for vacation for 2 weeks before moving back to America. He said he was sorry he had lied to both of us (he didnt tell the new guy he already had a boyfriend). He just caught up with the feeling and didnt know what to do. He asked me to wait 2 weeks for the new guys to leave for US, so we could start over.
At that point, I was really about to forgive him, and waited. He sounded so genuine and honest. I believed what he said. He was always the romantic type, so I thought he was truly losing his way, and I'd be patient and forgive him. But then when I mentioned the new guy's name, I saw his eyes truly lighted up. Like, there were sparkles in his eyes. I truly felt his feeling for the other guy. So I decided that was it. I would let him go. Because I didn't wanna compete myself with that. So we ended on good terms.
It broke my heart, and his too. But I didn't wanna continue a relationship like that, knowing that it would later fill with doubt and insecurity.
|
|
|
Member Since: 12/1/2010
Posts: 23,572
|
My first breakup was bad! He cheated, but it was also my first breakup. It was just really raw.
However the worst was my first love. That hurt because I was so in love and head over heels, and trying everything to make it work...but he didn't feel the same way. So I called it off and then he started a new relationship, and they seemed to have everything I ever wanted with him
But then they broke up and we started the beginning of a turbulent off/on relationship. As of today we have a better understanding of each other. We're cool 
|
|
|
Member Since: 4/12/2008
Posts: 11,333
|
I had a 2 year relationship and I was cheating on my boyfriend for the last 4 months with one of my friends. When he found out he broke up with my on my birthday.  Worst birthday ever and I deserved it.
|
|
|
Member Since: 5/19/2011
Posts: 34,328
|
I've only had 2 boyfriends.
On 12/12/12 I was with my ex on a mall, I remember he was getting a tattoo and gave me his phone unlocked while they were working on the tattoo. I don't usually do it but I had my doubts about him, like, lots of doubts, so I looked for things on his phone and I found a lot of things, more than I would've liked. He was cheating on me.
I just got in the room, gave him the phone with the chats opened and of course he knew I read everything. Then he came out, we got into a fight (verbal, but I didn't make a big deal of it because we were on a public place and, of course, there was nothing to talk about in private. So I just insulted him (lmao) and then I went home.
It was terrible. That was my last relationship to date.
EDIT: Oh, an yeah, that hurt and he damaged me. I was broken and I recently had to go to therapy for my insecurities and stuff because of that relationship.
|
|
|
Member Since: 3/15/2013
Posts: 32,106
|
Quote:
Originally posted by Saskia
I dated a man considerably older than me and he got cancer and passed away. for me, it was worse than a breakup.
And currently now, my boyfriend I guess has fallen out of love after 4 years. Saying I'm too negative. I guess among other reasons. Still haven't worked out all the details 
|
How old are you now and how old were you and the guy who died of cancer?
|
|
|
Member Since: 12/1/2010
Posts: 23,572
|
Quote:
Originally posted by Jackson
Lord my story is pretty messy
So there was this guy I was dating last year. We were young, in love, and gay, so naturally we moved way too fast into things and ended up moving in together after 3 months of dating. TBH that should have been the first warning sign but you do blind, stupid things when you're in love.
Another initial problem is that we were both extremely independent, especially me. Whenever things got stressful between us or in my personal life I would just go and work out or hike or be in nature for a few hours without telling anyone where I was going. And that's something I've always done and can't really be taken away from me because it's the only way I feel in control of my life. But that REALLY bothered him so whenever I would leave without telling him where I went he would lock the door on me.
The first real problems came when I "accidentally"  would read his text messages. I already had trust issues stemming from other relationships but this put it to a new level. He would text his friend in Washington that he didn't think we'd work out in the long run, or tell his friends about every little thing I did that irked him. Right there I should have known it was too late to save things but we kept things going for a few more months.
Now over the summer when we had first met we agreed to lay out all our issues in the open and be completely honest with each other. He told me about a married guy (married to another man) that he was friends with that he had ended up in bed with one time, but told me they didn't talk anymore and that it was one of his hugest regrets. So I was surprised to find him one day at home skyping and playing some video game with him. Immediately it was a red flag for me, but he told me everything was OK and even invited me to go stay at their place with him for a weekend, which I reluctantly agreed to do. It was fun, but when we got home I found a text on his phone to the affect of "it's OK, my husband didn't see anything". Being young and stupid it bothered me but I didn't say anything about it.
So the day after Christmas I went home to Colorado to visit family. A few days later I called my ex and he told me he had stayed over at the married guy's place one night. I told him that wasn't OK with me and he agreed to stop seeing him again. I was still super suspicious, so I logged into my ex's snapchat and posed as him until I got a confession out of the husband. I finally got what I wanted and flew back the next day. On the plane I was practically sobbing the whole way as I decided I was going to break up with him when I saw him. When my ex picked me up from the airport it was evident from my expression that he knew what was up. He had told me he wanted to greet me and kiss me when he saw me but we didn't even touch.
On the way home I finally confronted him. First I gave him an opportunity to confess, saying "Is there anything you want to tell me?" After he refused I finally said "I know you cheated on me". We were at a red light, and his head practically hit his hands on the steering wheel as he admitted defeat. We argued a little and after some kind of weird contortion of the truth I decided to hold off on breaking up a few more nights. It was New Year's Eve and we put on a show so we could host our party. But a few days later we finally called it quits.
After that I've only seen him once, although I did catfish him 2-3 times on grindr because I both missed him and wanted him to suffer  . I haven't seen him since February and never want to again tbh because he's a POS and I've been over him since mid-February but he also has my bike and owes me about $500 so I might have to  And that was probably longer than it needed to be nn
|
I would have been livid!!! I would have been in prison, he would be dead 
|
|
|
Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 2,031
|
I broke up with my first ever boyfriend of 1 year because he didn't wish me a Happy New Year.
|
|
|
|
|