Wine for when you wanna get soccer mom drunk. Like the type of drunk where you just got back from soccer practice w the kids in your Honda odyssey, go to make dinner, pour multiple glasses drinking the entire bottle when no one is looking and claim to only have had like 1 or 2 glasses, but nobody questions you because you do this every day and your huge wine collection holds the effect to where nobody notices when 1 or 5 bottles go missing
But in all seriousness, the only correct response to this thread is JAMESON WHISKEY:
