Originally posted by Patri

Less dramatic but more embarrassing was the first time we went to a beach and I swallowed a mouthful of seawater. I asked my dad who put the salt in the water and he - being a very big joker - told me it was my aunt (because this aunt used too much salt when she cooks). When I got home, I bragged to my all friends that my aunt was the one who puts the salt in the sea

Originally posted by Patri

We live in Canada so when winter came around, they'd dress my sister and I up in bulky snow suits & boots which made us considerably heavier.

So to avoid having to carry us in when we inevitably fell asleep in the car, they told us that falling asleep in a car when the heating was on would kill us.

Less dramatic but more embarrassing was the first time we went to a beach and I swallowed a mouthful of seawater. I asked my dad who put the salt in the water and he - being a very big joker - told me it was my aunt (because this aunt used too much salt when she cooks). When I got home, I bragged to my all friends that my aunt was the one who puts the salt in the sea

Originally posted by Outlaws

Originally posted by HausofAri

My mom told me that babies came out of armpits when they were born.

Originally posted by MissAmericanDream

We were at a culturally appropriate Mexican restaurant and my dad told me to eat one of the pickles on the table so I did and then my mouth started burning up and my parents were laughing. They tricked me into eating a jalapeno Child abuse.

Originally posted by Patri

We live in Canada so when winter came around, they'd dress my sister and I up in bulky snow suits & boots which made us considerably heavier.

So to avoid having to carry us in when we inevitably fell asleep in the car, they told us that falling asleep in a car when the heating was on would kill us.

Less dramatic but more embarrassing was the first time we went to a beach and I swallowed a mouthful of seawater. I asked my dad who put the salt in the water and he - being a very big joker - told me it was my aunt (because this aunt used too much salt when she cooks). When I got home, I bragged to my all friends that my aunt was the one who puts the salt in the sea

Originally posted by Dalai

When I was 6, I asked my mom how I came into the world and her response was "I bought you at the store down the road." So I'm like "I really want to see this store that's full of babies" and she tells me that it "closed down" just after I was born. And whenever I was naughty, she'd always be like "don't you dare. I still have my receipt so I can return you and get another child" and I would lose it.

I believed the bitch up until we were taught about human reproduction

Originally posted by Patri

We live in Canada so when winter came around, they'd dress my sister and I up in bulky snow suits & boots which made us considerably heavier.

So to avoid having to carry us in when we inevitably fell asleep in the car, they told us that falling asleep in a car when the heating was on would kill us.

Less dramatic but more embarrassing was the first time we went to a beach and I swallowed a mouthful of seawater. I asked my dad who put the salt in the water and he - being a very big joker - told me it was my aunt (because this aunt used too much salt when she cooks). When I got home, I bragged to my all friends that my aunt was the one who puts the salt in the sea

Originally posted by Patri

We live in Canada so when winter came around, they'd dress my sister and I up in bulky snow suits & boots which made us considerably heavier.

So to avoid having to carry us in when we inevitably fell asleep in the car, they told us that falling asleep in a car when the heating was on would kill us.

Less dramatic but more embarrassing was the first time we went to a beach and I swallowed a mouthful of seawater. I asked my dad who put the salt in the water and he - being a very big joker - told me it was my aunt (because this aunt used too much salt when she cooks). When I got home, I bragged to my all friends that my aunt was the one who puts the salt in the sea

Originally posted by Dalai

When I was 6, I asked my mom how I came into the world and her response was "I bought you at the store down the road." So I'm like "I really want to see this store that's full of babies" and she tells me that it "closed down" just after I was born. And whenever I was naughty, she'd always be like "don't you dare. I still have my receipt so I can return you and get another child" and I would lose it.

I believed the bitch up until we were taught about human reproduction

Originally posted by ClarksonSlays

Omfg my stepdad did that to me so often

One time my mom left me a lunchable for lunch and my stepdad told me that I had to eat an onion first before I could have it, and I took a HUGE ass bite out of that onion

Then he told me a bowl of mayo was pudding at Disney World, so gross

Originally posted by Lućifer

My mom told me if i jump so hard the devil would snatch me



omg yes

Originally posted by Nasty Nas

"I'm not gonna beat you, just come here"