Thank you guys!
I'm surprised you all generally liked it
Hopefully me submitting late isn't going to be the reason for me leaving
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Originally posted by Lovesong
12. Dylobs – One More Time
This was very touching from you. The song was filled with emotion, and written in such a brilliant way. I love that you wrote something you know about and I think that helped to elevate the approach. Gosh, this was probably the saddest song of the bunch, particularly that chorus. I could imagine this being a very difficult song to sing live, but at the same time I like that you took the opportunity to talk about something people tend to overlook.
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Thank you
I really wanted to tackle this issue since there have been people around me who have been subjected to this and it was the recent news in my country that really made me want to write
something about it, even if I thought it might be terribly executed, which it doesn't seem to have been..
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Originally posted by GotSkill
12. Dylobs – One More Time
Recently I’ve become a huge fan of your writing. As I’ve become more accustomed to it I’ve noticed various nuances that contribute to the brilliance of your style. The double meaning of the first line of the chorus was stunningly executed. Only a few awkward lines (“when she thinks she is in the clear”, for example) hinder the otherwise breathtaking storytelling and emotion present in this song. The bridge, especially, in its repetition and hopeless simplicity, stands out among the mass of mediocrity this week (sorry guys but it’s true) to make you and your entry stand out.
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Thank you. I probably should've proof-read it again when I wasn't tired to pick up on some of those. I'm glad you've become somewhat accustomed to my writing though. The one thing I was scared about in this was not doing it justice and I feel like you think I've done a decent job and that makes me happy.
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Originally posted by Sam
12. Dylobs – One More Time
First note: for some reason I associate the title ‘One More Time’ with a pop bop, so this was a little strange at first. Second note: you know what? I feel like you’ve been flying under the radar throughout this competition but this is actually a really great example of powerful writing. I think picking such a specific event and relating it to other events in general was such a unique approach and the way the victim goes from reliving the memories in the first verse to realizing that she won’t be the only or last in the second was a really great progression. “She’ll persevere as possible” was awkwardly worded but that’s about it. Serious writing really works for you. Great work.
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Yeah songs like One More Time just felt better executed to me than songs like In The Zone (
) Thanks for thinking I'm the Dark Horse of the competition. I honestly thought I would be the G.U.Y. when I signed up but
it was probably the part I struggled most with.
Congrats