Yeah, but I like where you going with it. It's so simple, but it really packs a punch! It's like my songwriting… I'm so not existential, but you and I have a way of just showcasing human nature at its rawest…
I always tell my boyfriend that he's out of my league and I'm really lucky to have him, and for some reason I started writing this. It has a Country tune to it, which I've never written before and it's not finished either.
Outta My League
It's almost six am
And I've still not been to sleep
Been thinking 'bout you all night long
I could really use a drink
We're not even fighting
So why do I question things
The sun is slowly rising
As I whisper your name
I know you're mine
But I'm still scared
One day you'll be gone
And I'll be left here
Just sitting on my own
Thinking to myself
I always knew
You were outta my league
When we were first met
My heart was on my sleave
I should of trusted my extinct
That one day you would leave
Cause you were outta my league
(Oh yeah)
You were outta my league
So far outta my league
I can relate to this! I think you meant instinct, not extinct though
I'm thinking of working more on songwriting. I like writing lyrics and stuff in my spare time but I don't really focus on it... It's more of a pastime. I'm thinking if I actually focus I could write a coherent song but it's hard.
Was there a thread before this? I feel like I posted once in a songwriting thread but it was a long long time ago like 2011/2012.
Quote:
Originally posted by Nait Phoenix
I was in a real slump for a while, so I finally got back to writing what's going on in my head instead of others… by writing about me being in the head of others… Confusing!? You bet it is!
Pain
First Verse:
I’m tired of hearing the same old
Saying I can’t feel what they feel
Telling me that I will never understand
The torture they’re in is so real
You’re telling me what I shouldn’t do
While you do to me what you say I can’t
Call some other kettle black if you must
But don’t condescend the way that I act
Pre-Chorus 1:
Oh…
I may not feel the same, but I’m getting there
Oh…
‘Cause I understand that life ain’t fair
Chorus 1:
I don’t wanna feel the needle
If I see that it hurts
I don’t wanna strike the first match
If I know how it burns
I don’t wanna pull the trigger
If I want to see him die
I can see the pain in his eyes
Second Verse:
I’m tired of being told
Not to interfere with other’s lives
Not to get too wrapped up
For fear I’ll tear it up with lies
Don’t you see she’s crying?
All she needs is someone around
I don’t plan on losing my friend
I wanna pick her up off the ground
Pre-Chorus 2:
Oh…
I may not feel their pain, but I understand
Oh…
That life never goes exactly how it’s planned
Chorus 2:
I don’t wanna feel the needle
If I see that it hurts
I don’t wanna strike the first match
If I know how it burns
I don’t wanna stick the knife in
If I want to see her die
I can see the pain in her eyes
Bridge:
Broken bones and promises
Aching wounds and bleeding hearts
Negative trumps positive
When you feel like shattered parts
Mirror, mirror on the wall
Tell me who am I to call when I need a hand
If no one could understand?
Right now I do understand
Yeah, but it'll be a while before I'm out of my songwriting shlump… I think my production skills are heightening nowadays, tho… maybe in the fall I'll be back, baby…
Speaking of my production skills, my new single is officially out. Check it out below…
Wrote this dancey song, it's still about the same guy (with whom things have gotten worse for me), but you know - at least I get some good songs out of this whole mess.
Before You Walk Out The Door
I didn’t ask for this
You came along like a thief in the night
Now my heart is lost forever
And I am on the culprit’s side
All along, I deluded myself
I’ve been wasting my time
It’s no better than playing pretend
There’s a scar on my chest
Oh, they say it will fade away in time
I don’t believe it
Because it still hurts me every once in a while
Before you walk out the door
Let me know when you’re leaving
Words are clouding my mind
And they might be worth saying
I don’t want to feel this way
And I can’t keep it in another day
The truth is I love you
How do I let go?
But I must let go
Have to let you go
Somebody let me know
How to let you go
You don’t have to know
There’s a part of me that wants to reveal it
But everything tells me to keep it a secret
In case I lose everything
And I love you
I tried so hard not to care
But you were like a damn bulldozer
I was so unprepared
I had my heart under guard
Spent years strengthening my walls
You worked your way in
I can only watch my defenses fall
Before you walk out the door
Let me know when you’re leaving
Words are clouding my mind
And they might be worth saying
I don’t want to feel this way
And I can’t keep it in another day
The truth is I love you
How do I let go?
But I must let go
Have to let you go
Somebody let me know
How to let you go
I never trusted easily
You’ve taken all my love
You own what’s left of my sanity
My heart was already broken
Now you’ve shattered what’s left of it
Can I fix it? Can’t replace it
The tools I would use are the ones you’ve taken
I don’t believe it when they say that I’ll be fine
All I see is the end, it looks like the tip of a sharpened knife
Before you walk out the door
Let me know when you’re leaving
Words are clouding my mind
And they might be worth saying
I don’t want to feel this way
And I can’t keep it in another day
The truth is I love you
How do I let go?
But I must let go
Have to let you go
Somebody let me know
How to let you go
And it hurts my heart
I have to let you go
Can someone ever heal it?
Well, I just don’t know
Just started this, it's a draft... Any tips, especially on the chorus would be appreciated. No hints needed on what it's about. #OhWell
You And I
You and I
We hadn't been talking much
Just asking how we were
I knew our time was running out
Nothing seemed to make it work
I kept hoping you wouldn't say
Those words that would bring the pain
No amount of preparation
Would help me feel any other way
So hold your tongue
Try not to make a sound
No need to say another word
We can keep going on somehow
You and I can find a way
To breakthrough this dark, cold place
If we keep trying, maybe things will change
Tomorrow's a brand new day
You and I can find a way
These are just sample lyrics of some of the songs I've written, I didn't want to overwhelm anyone. I like to play with a lot of imagery & metaphors which I hope you can all see.
Long Live
Forged inside these walls
Made of bronze & armor
Are stories that are told
Of illusion in technicolor
Of a feeling so bold
It took over like a hunger
And of warnings not to fall
But in truth we are none the wiser
In Love & War
You say we're partners in this war
Yet you're behind enemy lines
The road to you is not that far
Just flooded with enemy mines
Is it even worth the fight
For a love we know might die
Do we break down all our forts
For grenades filled with our lies
Dark Lies
The darkness told me lies & hid your shadow
How could I have been so blind as you led & I followed
It was cruel to be kind, cause you'd change by tomorrow
And in the silence I would cry & I believe that you'd know
Run
If I slow down the beat
To a tempo that suits you
Then I might lose
In this game that we've begun
You thought you could hurt me
But I'm a master in this field
You better grab your shield
Or better yet just run
Is anyone gonna get the thread now that Tymps is gone for at least a year? We definitely need someone who can change the thread title and stuff. Maybe we should choose someone and then ask HQ?
I wanted to write songs for years. I still didn't try because i'm scared that lyrics would be tacky, generic or cringeworthy (i know everyone has to start from something). Plus english isn't my first language so it's hard with vocabulary and grammar.
I like most of your work here. It kind of inspire me to try writing songs
Also I want to share one of my songs from Platinum Hit. It won the round it was entered in (round 2) and was scored 9/10, my 3rd or 4th highest scorer (Nait never told me the individual score of Siren Song so I don't know )
PHOBIA
Phobia
When you try to speak
Its like you’re all alone
I can’t hear a thing
You knock but nobody’s home
Black light in my eyes
Yeah, you turned me to stone
With an iron heart
Buried deep in the unknown
The tables are turning
This time I'm taking the lead
A new power's rising
Its glory, its all that I need
I’ll be your defeat
I’ll be your bloody end
See you in your dreams
Cause I am your nightmare’s friend
I’ll be your obsession, your sorrow
Start of a dark era
I’ll be your phobia
Don’t mess with me
I'm fighting with every bone
And there’s no retreat
No way to run from this cyclone
Got tears in my eyes
Remember when you tormented my soul?
I’ll rise from the dead
Avenge the lies with my pistol
The tables are turning
This time I'm taking the lead
A new power's rising
Its glory, its all that I need
I’ll be your defeat
I’ll be your bloody end
See you in your dreams
Cause I am your nightmare’s friend
I’ll be your obsession, your sorrow
Start of a dark era
I’ll be your phobia
I’ll be your phobia
The blind lead the blind
Into the darkness of hell
But I’ve got you chained
So you have no soul you can sell
Remember revenge
Remember when you shut me out
A fire you fanned
Now get ready for your blackout
I’ll be your defeat
I’ll be your bloody end
See you in your dreams
Cause I am your nightmare’s friend
I’ll be your obsession, your sorrow
Start of a dark era
I’ll be your phobia
Fear me, fear me
I’ll be your phobia
Fear me, fear me
I’ll be your phobia
Also I want to share one of my songs from Platinum Hit. It won the round it was entered in (round 2) and was scored 9/10, my 3rd or 4th highest scorer (Nait never told me the individual score of Siren Song so I don't know )
PHOBIA
Phobia
When you try to speak
Its like you’re all alone
I can’t hear a thing
You knock but nobody’s home
Black light in my eyes
Yeah, you turned me to stone
With an iron heart
Buried deep in the unknown
The tables are turning
This time I'm taking the lead
A new power's rising
Its glory, its all that I need
I’ll be your defeat
I’ll be your bloody end
See you in your dreams
Cause I am your nightmare’s friend
I’ll be your obsession, your sorrow
Start of a dark era
I’ll be your phobia
Don’t mess with me
I'm fighting with every bone
And there’s no retreat
No way to run from this cyclone
Got tears in my eyes
Remember when you tormented my soul?
I’ll rise from the dead
Avenge the lies with my pistol
The tables are turning
This time I'm taking the lead
A new power's rising
Its glory, its all that I need
I’ll be your defeat
I’ll be your bloody end
See you in your dreams
Cause I am your nightmare’s friend
I’ll be your obsession, your sorrow
Start of a dark era
I’ll be your phobia
I’ll be your phobia
The blind lead the blind
Into the darkness of hell
But I’ve got you chained
So you have no soul you can sell
Remember revenge
Remember when you shut me out
A fire you fanned
Now get ready for your blackout
I’ll be your defeat
I’ll be your bloody end
See you in your dreams
Cause I am your nightmare’s friend
I’ll be your obsession, your sorrow
Start of a dark era
I’ll be your phobia
Fear me, fear me
I’ll be your phobia
Fear me, fear me
I’ll be your phobia
I like it. When i started reading i heard in my mind an instrumental which helped me sing it in my mind.
I think at the end i'd put one "fear me, fear me" after "start of a dark era". But it just suited my melody in my head and i don't know your planned melody for this song.
Another day, another song! Loving the activity going on in here, it's so interesting seeing what everyone's coming up with.
Break It To My Heart
I’m longing for your kiss
I know it can’t be mine
That’s why sometimes I’m sad
But then you make me smile
And I’m all up in arms over you
Like Sherlock Holmes, I’m looking for clues
And I shouldn’t be the type of boy who needs your validation
I’ve been trying really hard to work you out of the equation
They say love is really beautiful; I call it an affliction
Watch me hunger for your love
Oh, break it to my heart
I never thought I could like falling apart
And when I look in your eyes
All I see are stars
I know that you don’t feel the sparks
So break it to my heart
I let the words fall out
I can’t take them back
Now I feel unsteady
I’m on a different track
I don’t know how to deal with this
It’s like I’m driving into a mist
And if I were a captain, you would be why my boat’s sinking
What I should have done was tell my heart your love was not for taking
Now I’m scared of all the things I’m no longer at risk of losing
Now you know that I’m in love
Oh, break it to my heart
I never thought I could like falling apart
And when I look in your eyes
All I see are stars
I know that you don’t feel the sparks
So break it to my heart
I guess that I feel stupid
Let myself believe for a second
Feeding myself the lies
Making up alibis
Just to keep you around
Tell me what to do now
Oh, break it to my heart
I never thought I could like falling apart
And when I look in your eyes
All I see are stars
I know that you don’t feel the sparks
So break it to me
Oh, break it to my heart
I never thought I could like falling apart
And when I look in your eyes
I still see the stars
I know that you don’t feel the sparks
So break it to my heart
Break it to my heart
All I see are stars
Break it to my heart
I know you’re not in love
But I still want you here
And I’m still keeping you dear
Break it to my heart
Just break it to me
So, things happened between me and my crush and it's whatever. Honestly, the whole situation was emotionally exhausting and I'm glad that it's reached some kind of closure. I decided to sing this one, because I'm hoping it's gonna be the last one I write in a while and I wanted to get this one out in the open because I wanted to make sure I remembered the melody and phrasing.
It was on a summer’s day
When I first sailed into you
So calm, the water was
I never saw the storm that loomed
And so when it finally came
I saw that I crashed into rocks
Now I’m stuck clinging onto them
No sign of aid to help me off
I’m deep in it now
I feel like a fool
Let myself be ensnared by you
There’s no hope for me now
I’m lost in your ocean
And I’m set to drown
Now I don’t know why I ever got in
These waters were never meant to let me swim
I’m trying to breathe
I’m losing my cool
Then I gaze at your eyes
And my heart sinks into you
So in the savage storm
I confessed that I had wept
And suddenly it seemed so calm
But it wasn’t over yet
It came crashing down on me
That though you gave me a reprieve
I was still here, all alone
Stuck in an ocean with no hope
I’m losing my mind
I’m wasting my time
And I’m so swept away by you
There’s no hope for me now
I’m lost in your ocean
And I’m set to drown
Now I don’t know why I ever got in
These waters were never meant to let me swim
I’m trying to breathe
I’m losing my cool
Then I gaze at your eyes
And my heart sinks into you
I never saw it coming
And I won’t be the same
Your waves beat me down
I’m longing to drown
I feel like a fool
I was cursed before I ever sailed into you
There’s no hope for me now
I’m lost in your ocean
And I’m set to drown
Now I don’t know why I ever got in
These waters were never meant to let me swim
I’m trying to breathe
I’m losing my cool
Then I gaze at your eyes
And my heart sinks into you
Nothing I can do
My heart sinks into you
There’s no hope for me now
I’m lost in your ocean
And I’m set to drown
Now I don’t know why I ever got in
These waters were never meant to let me swim
I’m trying to breathe
I’m losing my cool
Then I gaze at your eyes
And my heart sinks into you
Just wrote down a chorus I kinda starting singing to myself. This is my first draft of it. I may end up throwing it away. Any comments would be appreciated
Now we're upside down
Things are falling apart
Tears are streaming down your face
From a broken heart
The whispers and lies
Have fallen onto both of us
What we first felt for each other
Has now turned into dust
Outta My League
why do I bother bumping? 
#OhWell
)