All human being experienced this kind of phase.. especially when you are going through "the dark night of the soul" like no other person in this world makes you feeling better, and no one understand what's inside you're dealing with left alone your scary thought of being gay, feeling unworthy, fear of rejections.. it's natural and the more you have courage to face your fears, the more your soul develop and just BEING the true you..
i've passed this stage of sh**, emotionally draining and it's so f**** hurtful

, feel like just wanna disappear and going HOME where no pains, future, past, judgement.. just FREE... i faced my reality and accept me as i am, not as easily as that song We Are Who We Are or Born This Way.. but it's something that we feel inside and being aware of who we are...
There was those weeks i felt like i'm crazy, crying on bed with no reasons... then let go of the feeling the next morning, at night crying again.. at peace for the next 10 minutes then 10 minutes later back to the pain and i love being in that pain for amount of time i need to and finally let them all go.. i used to holding on to my pain, idk why.. i think it's my EGO which trying to resist the fact that if i let them go, i'll live my life in peace, calm and happy and full of love.. oh yess... now i'm so damn happy most of the time, it doesn't mean there's no difficulty, but the way i deal with any problems in life is advanced and mature.
Just go with the flow sistrens...Remember that you are more than your feelings and thoughts... let them go.. seek a spiritual guru, wise people who has the gift of healing to lead you to your life path. We were born special with PURE LOVE and LIGHT... nothing wrong with you.. but the world is full of sickness nowadays.. so better surround yourself with loving people, who make you laugh and happy.. you'll get through all the pains.
XO
