Mary Lambert the young Christian slam poet realized at 17 that she, like her mother, was a lesbian entrenched in a disapproving religion. “Coming out was this ‘aha’ moment for me. Everything made sense. For the first time. I felt so good in my own skin, like now I fit.” Unfortunately the Evangelical Church she loved was less than supportive of her newfound realization. “The funny thing about the church is that they don’t see it as they’re being hateful or that they’re hurting a community. They have good intentions, and that’s what I try to remember about Evangelicals. All Christians are trying to come from a place of love, and they’re just confused and incredibly misguided into twisting words. But the thing is even if you’re all like ‘love the sinner, hate the sin’ you’re still full of hate.” Since both Mary and her first girlfriend were part of the Church, they tried to make sense of the contradiction between what felt right and what they were told was wrong. “I would sit in church and cry, just cry every Sunday.” Mary said, “I hated myself and wanted to die, so my girlfriend and I would pray. We wouldn’t pray not to be gay because even then we knew that couldn’t happen. Instead we prayed for forgiveness.”
