Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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Cracked: 5 Things That Are Likely to Become Pop Stars
With the recent success of video game icon Jigglypuff in the music industry, having a #6 single "Release!" with her album "Haven" set for at least a Top 5 debut, it makes you wonder what ELSE could possibly be marketed as a pop-star?
Maybe someday...
This is a list of the 5 most ridiculous things that could end up being marketed as a pop star.
5. Princess Peach
"Oh, I'm on the list? Too bad I'm in another castle..."
She has the look, the voice, the star-power...hell, this might even be less ridiculous than Jigglypuff. This is also a Nintendo character, so who knows, maybe one day she actually will release an album.
4. a cash register
Look how close we are already
Why not? It makes a pretty noise every time you open it up, same with a singer every time they open their mouth. Give it a bit of auto tune, and a cute stage name. BAM! Ca$h RegiSTAR! Climbing UP the charts! Buy their debut single "Put Money In Me".
3. loose-leaf paper
"I'm gettin' paper! (cuts)"
I mean, look how exploitable it is! It's literally a blank page, record companies could make it anything they want to! How would it sing, though? Same way you can make a blade of grass whistle.
2. the internet
Have you heard their unplugged vocals? They rock!
It could produce as many different vocals as it wants to, be anything it wants to be, and probably perform better than most current pop stars!
1. a rock
Bringing back real rock n' roll!
Their stage presence! Their song writing ability! Their pure TALENT. Promote it will enough, and people might even start..."stan"ning for...a rock. Hey, don't bash me, bash modern society.
cracked.com
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