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Discussion: Grindr racism exposed
Member Since: 10/10/2009
Posts: 10,662
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Quote:
Originally posted by ShouldersSideways
I mean, black men are already marginalized and treated differently. a gay black man has to go through it twofold is what I believe people are trying to say. The gay community should know how it feels to be excluded and at least have the wherewithal to be inclusive of different races.
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I hear you. I do. But what I'm saying is that many, as in a substantial number of people "complaining" are speaking anecdotally and hypothetically. As in, they've yet to see these things firsthand, nor experience them in real life. Which does a huge disseverce to the conversation because it makes a massive situation out of something that's actually rather rare. Leaving white gays feeling guilty and minorities thinking no one wants them. A lose-lose. It 's a mind-fu*k to an extent.
And I say that as a black male, with other black gay male friends, who attend gay clubs/bars regularly. We are not treated any differently. Literally, not in any way. And we pull like crazy, (hot) white guys included. My overall point being that there seems to be a significant dichotomy between "reality" and life lived behind a computer screen. Those in the latter seeking to paint life with the starkest brush available, based off things they've heard or read, and not actually experienced.
Does it mean these things don't exist? NO. But taking isolated hear-say situations and then concluding vast generalizations such as "white gays are overwhelmingly racists" is not doing favors for anyone.
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Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 15,135
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What's new? And y'all have to stop screaming "racisme!!1!1!!" At everything. Preferences = / = racism. 
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Banned
Member Since: 12/29/2002
Posts: 19,803
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Quote:
Originally posted by inspiration4
I hear you. I do. But what I'm saying is that many, as in a substantial number of people "complaining" are speaking anecdotally and hypothetically. As in, they've yet to see these things firsthand, nor experience them in real life. Which does a huge disseverce to the conversation because it makes a massive situation out of something that's actually rather rare. Leaving white gays feeling guilty and minorities thinking no one wants them. A lose-lose. It 's a mind-fu*k to an extent.
And I say that as a black male, with other black gay male friends, who attend gay clubs/bars regularly. We are not treated any differently. Literally, not in any way. And we pull like crazy, (hot) white guys included. My overall point being that there seems to be a significant dichotomy between "reality" and life lived behind a computer screen. Those in the latter seeking to paint life with the starkest brush available, based off things they've heard or read, and not actually experienced.
Does it mean these things don't exist? NO. But taking isolated hear-say situations and then concluding vast generalizations such as "white gays are overwhelmingly racists" is not doing favors for anyone.
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You and I would get along in real life  
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Member Since: 10/10/2009
Posts: 10,662
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Quote:
Originally posted by BlackStar_93
Amen, couldn't have said it better myself.
I don't understand the logic of marginalizing "racism in the gay community" away from racism in general, as if it's a bigger issue for gay people than it is for people in general. I mean, you go on ANY straight dating apps and you will see profiles of men and women who say "No (specific race)".
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EXACTLY.
I am so tired of ATRL trying to make racism something unique to the gay community. It would be laughable... if so many people didn't actually buy into it. 
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Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 10,527
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Quote:
Originally posted by inspiration4
Does it mean these things don't exist? NO. But taking isolated hear-say situations and then concluding vast generalizations such as "white gays are overwhelmingly racists" is not doing favors for anyone.
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I see what you're saying. My experiences are also formed through the context of living in the south, specifically the Bible Belt. White people here, gay or straight, aren't known for being racially inclusive. I can't speak on other areas.
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Member Since: 1/4/2014
Posts: 22,877
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Quote:
Originally posted by SweetTalker
What's new? And y'all have to stop screaming "racisme!!1!1!!" At everything. Preferences = / = racism. |
It is racist to prefer a RACE of people though. Like you're distinguishing human beings according to race, and then saying you like one more than the other.
noun: racism:
"the belief that all members of each race possess characteristics, abilities, or qualities specific to that race, especially so as to distinguish it as inferior or superior to another race or races."
Quote:
Originally posted by inspiration4
EXACTLY.
I am so tired of ATRL trying to make racism something unique to the gay community. It would be laughable... if so many people didn't actually buy into it. |
Honey two wrongs don't make a right. If gays are guilty of doing it, then gays are guilty of doing it. Whether or not the rest of the world does it, it's just as disgusting.
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Member Since: 11/27/2010
Posts: 9,806
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Quote:
Originally posted by ShouldersSideways
I see what you're saying. My experiences are also formed through the context of living in the south, specifically the Bible Belt. White people here, gay or straight, aren't known for being racially inclusive. I can't speak on other areas.
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Nyc is worse.
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Member Since: 1/4/2014
Posts: 22,877
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Quote:
Originally posted by Adonis
Nyc is worse.
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Which makes the other racist places "better"? What is up with this trend of shifting the blame? Face your own problems and deal with them. 
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Member Since: 2/2/2014
Posts: 11,309
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Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 15,135
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Quote:
Originally posted by Reinvention
It is racist to prefer a RACE of people though. Like you're distinguishing human beings according to race, and then saying you like one more than the other.
noun: racism:
"the belief that all members of each race possess characteristics, abilities, or qualities specific to that race, especially so as to distinguish it as inferior or superior to another race or races."
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This is funny. Whenever someone else posts this "definition" of racism, y'all are quick to drag them, and to say this isn't a "valid" definition and crap like that.
Still no racism btw. But well, you see this issue differently than I do.
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Member Since: 3/7/2012
Posts: 2,113
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Quote:
Originally posted by Reinvention
Honey two wrongs don't make a right. If gays are guilty of doing it, then gays are guilty of doing it. Whether or not the rest of the world does it, it's just as disgusting.
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Of course it's just as bad, regardless whether the racist in question is gay or not. Racism is disgusting full stop. But I'm failing to see why "racism in the gay community" is a topic on it's own? A gay racist is no different to a straight racist, yet you don't see articles titled "Racism exposed on straight dating App Tinder". Not only does it paint gay people to be awful, it also marginalizes the minority groups even more.
I've seen so many people on here say gays can use the "it's just a preference" excuse to disguise racism. For starters that's a matter of opinion and a whole other topic, but straight/bi people also use the "preference" when deciding whether or not they would date a particular race.
I bet you could find people who aren't white who say they won't date white people, and that's a fact. People are so damn sensitive and love the scream "racism" at anything and everything. I wish the people who put all their damn energy into this, would put just as much passion into fighting genuine, real life racism that is happening today, not trivial **** like an 18 year old twink who doesn't date Asian people.
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Member Since: 10/10/2009
Posts: 10,662
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Quote:
Originally posted by Vato
You and I would get along in real life |
Quote:
Originally posted by BlackStar_93
Of course it's just as bad, regardless whether the racist in question is gay or not. Racism is disgusting full stop. But I'm failing to see why "racism in the gay community" is a topic on it's own? A gay racist is no different to a straight racist, yet you don't see articles titled "Racism exposed on straight dating App Tinder". Not only does it paint gay people to be awful, it also marginalizes the minority groups even more.
I've seen so many people on here say gays can use the "it's just a preference" excuse to disguise racism. For starters that's a matter of opinion and a whole other topic, but straight/bi people also use the "preference" when deciding whether or not they would date a particular race.
I bet you could find people who aren't white who say they won't date white people, and that's a fact. People are so damn sensitive and love the scream "racism" at anything and everything. I wish the people who put all their damn energy into this, would put just as much passion into helping genuine racism that is happening today, not trivial **** like an 18 year old twink who doesn't date Asian people.
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Everything in this post
And I used to not be attracted to white people, like at all
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Member Since: 4/27/2010
Posts: 2,172
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Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 2,855
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Member Since: 3/7/2012
Posts: 2,113
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Quote:
Originally posted by inspiration4
Everything in this post
And I used to not be attracted to white people, like at all
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Thank you!!  I'm glad other people see it this way!
Haha! Exactly, that doesn't make you racist - it means you have a preference.
People saying it's racist to not date certain races, is the same warped logic as saying it's ageist to not date people of a certain age. I swear, the word racism is thrown around so much these days that people can't distinguish between genuine racism, and SJW racism.
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Member Since: 5/18/2012
Posts: 20,576
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Quote:
Originally posted by BlackStar_93
Of course it's just as bad, regardless whether the racist in question is gay or not. Racism is disgusting full stop. But I'm failing to see why "racism in the gay community" is a topic on it's own? A gay racist is no different to a straight racist, yet you don't see articles titled "Racism exposed on straight dating App Tinder". Not only does it paint gay people to be awful, it also marginalizes the minority groups even more.
I've seen so many people on here say gays can use the "it's just a preference" excuse to disguise racism. For starters that's a matter of opinion and a whole other topic, but straight/bi people also use the "preference" when deciding whether or not they would date a particular race.
I bet you could find people who aren't white who say they won't date white people, and that's a fact. People are so damn sensitive and love the scream "racism" at anything and everything. I wish the people who put all their damn energy into this, would put just as much passion into fighting genuine, real life racism that is happening today, not trivial **** like an 18 year old twink who doesn't date Asian people.
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Exactly.
I really don't see it as racist especially when you have non-white people who'll do the same to other races and even within their own groups.
To call it racist is over the top. Just move on and find someone else. If you're that angry a white guy won't talk to you get your priorities straight.
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Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 23,857
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Wow, everything on this page is just cringe-worthy. 
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Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 23,857
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Quote:
Originally posted by BlackStar_93
Of course it's just as bad, regardless whether the racist in question is gay or not. Racism is disgusting full stop. But I'm failing to see why "racism in the gay community" is a topic on it's own? A gay racist is no different to a straight racist, yet you don't see articles titled "Racism exposed on straight dating App Tinder". Not only does it paint gay people to be awful, it also marginalizes the minority groups even more.
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Racism isn't straightforward and a great umbrella. There are various faucets. It can be as blatant as possible (the KKK; using n-word), based on ignorance (Conferdate flag; lack of acknowledge of the other races' issues), Subtle (this one most people don't usually realize what they're doing, usually based on stereotypes), political (the opposition to Obama is more than just political disagreements), and so on.
Racism in the gay community is a targeted issue that black gays have been trying to fight for years now. You can't simply lump gay racism with straight racism, it doesn't work like that because there is a different purpose in mind. Homosexuals collectively understand what it's like to be discriminated against. That alone should makes them more open and want to understand the issue with racism, especially when other gays are committing these acts.
Also you won't see "Racism exposed on straight dating App Tinder" because 1) Straight people barely use these apps and 2) you'd need to actually match with each other to even hold a conversation.
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I've seen so many people on here say gays can use the "it's just a preference" excuse to disguise racism. For starters that's a matter of opinion and a whole other topic, but straight/bi people also use the "preference" when deciding whether or not they would date a particular race.
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It's not a" matter of opinion", it's true. Obviously not ALL gays use preference to disguise racism but no one is going to own up to being a racist in the 21st century. The biggest flaw in this all is that you're trying to give the benefit of doubt by factoring in straight relationships which already function differently from gay relationships.
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I bet you could find people who aren't white who say they won't date white people, and that's a fact. People are so damn sensitive and love the scream "racism" at anything and everything. I wish the people who put all their damn energy into this, would put just as much passion into fighting genuine, real life racism that is happening today, not trivial **** like an 18 year old twink who doesn't date Asian people.
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And how do you know they don't? Black gays especially have to fight racism on two fronts while trying to fight homophobia in the black community (unless you're going to tell me that homophobia is no different in different races like your racism comment). The white twink that isn't dating Asian people is a gross simplification of the issue here. Most people obviously don't care if a couple cute white twinks isn't into them. More fishes in the sea. But when you have a large number of people expressing "no (race)" or making subtle racist comments or even simply ignoring a race all together for no real reason how can you tell us to get over it. If racism in the gay community isn't a serious problem then tell me why black gays are having black/white profile pic, refuse to put their race down and try to past off as non-black on Grindr, Jack'd, Hornet and even ****ing Tinder? I seen it too many times.
Closing note: I'm not saying that having a preference is racism. I myself am black and have a "preference" for white and latinos (mostly latinos). There's a lot of black guys in my area so I get a lot of messages from them. I have never felt a need to add "latinos only" especially when several of the guys were cute. For those black gays I mentioned above, I don't ask "are you white" (that's a comment that goes around a lot, especially for the latino/hispanic gay community).
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Banned
Member Since: 6/9/2011
Posts: 17,950
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Grindr is so, so scary to me. I don't judge anyone who uses it but it's just not for me. I personally wouldn't feel safe using it. Plus, the 'no-*insert race*' people who show only their torsos and are normally 35+ make my skin crawl. I also don't do NSA, so...
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Member Since: 11/27/2010
Posts: 9,806
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I know I hate when guys feed me the line... you must be latino or something as if they couldn't possibly be attracted to someone who is black. I'm like no I'm regular black. Gay people can be so racist and not even realize it.
Quote:
Originally posted by Reinvention
Which makes the other racist places "better"? What is up with this trend of shifting the blame? Face your own problems and deal with them. |
I'm saying that the liberals are just people trying to get theirs without any regard for those outside of their bubble.
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