That's right, because my first presentation of the night wasn't enough of a mess, I'm here to present once again! Good evening, ATRL members and, more importantly, the guests that keep the forum loading at a halt. For those of you who do not know me, my username is DejaEntendu, which just so happens to be the name of an album by a band named Brand New, which you can listen to or purchase on iTunes, Google Play, Amazon (a bargain for only $5 on Amazon's mp3 store ), on Spotify, or on YouTube.
On to the more important business of tonight, I am here to announce the winner of the ATRL Grammy award for Best Country Album! Hunter_13 presented this award last year, but he was banned, so I guess that a member who joined in 2010 and has less than 2,000 posts was the next best option. Since both members and guests are tuning out quickly on account of no one caring about this award, here are the nominees!
Lady Igloo Antebellum - 747
While they may be charting around #747 on iTunes with
their latest single, Lady Antebellum is still only
remembered for their 2010 #2-peaking single, “Need
You Now.” And we haven’t needed them since.
"Bartender" was a b0p though
Country threeway Lady Antebellum is nominated tonight with what I assume includes their 747th attempt at a hit crossover single, 747. Lady Antebellum, pictured below, arriving at the ATRL Grammys, looking like inbred siblings (especially the basic one on the left; but Hilary Scott is serving!).
Do they always stand in this formation? Is the one on the right always awkwardly staring at nothing into the distance?
Dolly Parton - Blue Smoke
The great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-
great-great-great-great-great-grandmother of country
music, Dolly Parton, dropped yet another posthumous
album in 2014. Titled Blue Smoke, it is presumably
named after the gaseous substance that occasionally
and inexplicably seeps out of Dolly Parton’s totally
authentic rack. Judging by the album cover, I'm not
wrong.
Dolly Parton, arriving
in an archived photo of the
ATRL Grammys of 1699.
Dolly Parton accepting her
lifetime achievement award
at the ATRL Grammys in 1847.
Cassadee Pope - Frame By Frame
Former pop-punk band frontwoman Cassadee Pope is
now a country artist! In 2013, Cassadee released her
debut album, Frame By Frame. Despite winning the
third season of The Voice, Cassadee still only sold
43,000 copies of Frame By Frame in its first (and
only) frame on the Billboard 200. She is still the most
successful winner of The Voice. We invited Cassadee
Pope to present an award tonight after country
chanteuse Jamie Lynn Spears had to drop out following
the unfortunate revelations of her knife-weilding incident,
but Cassadee showed up at the wrong awards show
(see photo on the right). Cassadee's mistake is very
understandable because NASCAR and ATRL are very
much alike: both are dominated by hormonal males who
care far too much about winning worthless trophies.
Why is Cassadee giving me teas of a teenager speaking
at the Model U.N. in this picture though?
Miranda Lambert - Platinum
With inspired song titles such as “Bathroom Sink” and
“Old ****,” Miranda Lambert released her fifth album,
which also has an inspired title, Platinum. Platinum
has yet to scan platinum, so maybe a more appropriate
title would have been Gold.Old **** isn’t a bad
name for this an album, either.
In case of emergency, Miranda's singing body double is
prepared to stand in for her at tonight's event.
Stand, but not perform. Don't get your hopes up.
Eric Church - Take Me to Church The Outsiders
I had to do a double take because this is
ATRL, and Eric Church is a male country artist,
nominated for an ATRL Grammy, but he is not
Luke Bryan. All I can say is that he must be
hungover all the time since he’s never been
seen without sunglasses. Not that I can blame
him with his career in country music.
ATRL is unfortunately too poor to give out actual
awards this year, so all winners will receive
certificates similar to ones below that Eric
Chuch won at another awards show.
Buy ATRL+ and support ATRL, sistrens!
And the ATRL Grammy for Best Country Album goes to...
Miranda Lambert - Platinum wins the ATRL Grammy for Best Country Album!
Miranda Lambert photographed at the moment of her victory, being blessed by Lady Gaga herself!
Miranda Lambert seems to have brought her own award up to the stage instead of accepting her ATRL Grammy paper certificate! What a slap in the face to the ATRL community.
Miranda was swiftly pulled from the stage due to this stunt. However, Gaga assisted her with a costume change, and before Miranda was dragged away, she had one thing to say:
As Miranda was dragged, she unfortunately dropped the phallic award she had brought to the ATRL Grammys ceremony. Luckily, Miranda Lambert's singing body double picked up the award and was able to finish Miranda's acceptance speech.
and with that, the body double Miranda wandered off the stage, left the building, and was abducted by aliens to finally begin the promotion for the third single off Britney Miranda Jean, the leaked demo verison of "Alien."
Let's take a look at some audience reactions of Miranda winning the ATRL Grammy Award for Best Country Album.
Our camera crews caught up with Cassadee Pope outside of the NASCAR Sprint Cup Awards. Cassadee, visibly distraught over missing the ATRL Grammys, is Wasting All These Tears over this tragic loss. Cassadee is also crying because her idol, Canadian Beauty/Canadian Psycho Avril Lavigne, has just been arrested on charges of being a public nuisance, damaging public property, and heinous cultural appropriation for her overtly racist "Hello Kitty" music video.
Back in the audience, Kacey Musgraves is very impressed!
Country singer Luke Bryan is very impressed as well, and Miranda's husband Blake Shelton appears to be in awe at his wife's win! Country is such a close-knit community,
As you can see, ATRL has also partnered with Shazam to give all members the chance of a lifetime to get Ariana Grande to record your voicemail message! Contact ATRL member MiMiLamb a.k.a. Frankie Grande for more details.
Unfortunately, DejaEntendu will be absent for the rest of the evening, posting bail for Avril Lavigne because Epic Records is too poor to do so. #Pray4Avril
), 
The body double comment, the Lady Antebellum formation, Cassadee speaking to the UN, and Eric not being Luke Bryan
Cassadee is also crying because her idol, Canadian Beauty/Canadian Psycho Avril Lavigne, has just been arrested on charges of being a public nuisance, damaging public property, and heinous cultural appropriation for her overtly racist "Hello Kitty" music video.
And won? 
