[Temporal]

Batch Two

Originally posted by 8thPrince

Musickid –
You’ve strung together a piece that’s ultimately pretty weak and superficial. I don’t have a greater understanding of you after reading this other than you supposedly having a drug dependency. It’s described as a very high-functioning dependency as well, there’s no sense of weight, and that shouldn’t happen in a challenge where you were to illustrate a major component of yourself. “What causes you to turn to these pills?” should be the obvious question that was answered, but you never touch on it. Add in some particularly cheesy rhymes and it becomes clear that this piece isn’t what you needed to put out at this point in the competition.

Tylerbv –
Enjoyed the examination on how alcohol changes the personality. You’ve touched on what I think a lot of young people turn to drinking for: escaping inhibitions. Hope you learned that it’s better to be a boring sober person than a drunk ****head!
I think you detailed the experience nicely, but I would’ve liked a slightly larger scope, with perhaps the inclusion of your present self and how this experience changed your personality while sober. Additionally, there are some mismatches in voice that don’t fit a seventeen-year-old (“Off the wagon, living in the bottle”, etc.), but it’s still OK. Not my favorite from you, but still fitting of the challenge.

Dylobs –
I was worried this week that people would put more emphasis on the keywords than the actual challenge, and I’m afraid you feel in that trap. The point of the challenge was to give us greater insight into you, events important to you, and there’s so many layers of abstraction here that any semblance of a real person or event has been completely smothered. I have no idea who Dylobs is or what hurts him, I only know you’re good at writing an extended metaphor. This isn’t that great of a departure from your previous stuff, sadly. There’s some smart lines here, like the twist on dirty laundry, but it ultimately doesn’t matter. You don’t tell us in concrete terms what this person did to hurt you, or what insecurities you had. Sometimes abstraction really doesn’t matter, it can’t dress up a hole this big in your narrative.

Cheetahwings –
Basically the same complaints as Dylobs here. You put more emphasis on the prompt and didn’t write something actually relevant to you. I don’t have a greater sense of who you are as a person after reading this. It’s all put together really nicely, but I can see right through the metaphors to the hollow center. WHAT did this person do to make you hate them? WHAT QUALITIES repulse Thecheetahwings the most? What CAN’T you forgive? Those are all questions that could’ve been answered, even if you’ve never personally come across someone you hate. This doesn’t work to give me a better view of your values.

Moonchild –
I think talking about the concept of face was a great concept for a song about upbringings. You covered how it affected family life and your personal life, all within a short running length, and I think you did so sufficiently. I do think the Wizard of Oz reference is a bit bizarre; it does fit the Southern setting, but I don’t quite see how it fits thematically. Still, I’m impressed with how you touch on how being raised as a good example of your family/community morphs into a conflict between maintaining your outward image or actual self as you grow up.

[Temporal]

Score Averages
TempGOD - 7.11
Jackson - 6.11
Swiftie13 - 6.99
8thPrince - 5.71

First time I'm the highest scoring judge!

[Temporal]

Scores are in!

[CountryBritney]

Looking forward to the scores and next challenge (given I'm not eliminated anyway

[feelslikeadream]

Did you post averages from other rounds? I don't remember. How did this round compare to other rounds?

[Nait Phoenix]

Never noticed you posting 8th's scores before…
I REALLY must be checked out…

[Tylerbv]

Not 5.71
I'm missing results because I'm at work, but hopefully I don't get eliminated

[swiftie13]

The way we all agreed this round

[Temporal]

Originally posted by feelslikeadream

Did you post averages from other rounds? I don't remember. How did this round compare to other rounds?

I post them sporadically.

This was my 2nd highest scoring round, only R3, the Pokémon Types average had a higher average from me.
Both 8th and I gave out our 2nd 10s ever this round.
Swiftie's average dropped over a point from last round, and is his lowest scoring round since R4.
Jackson's average also dropped slightly, but his average has remained from 6.1 - 6.5 since R2.

The average scores this week ranged from 8.75 to 4.53, so we had some diversity

[Cupid]

When is 6pm

[swiftie13]

Originally posted by Vision

When is 6pm

Same

[Jackson]

Originally posted by Vision

When is 6pm

in an hour

[Cupid]

Originally posted by swiftie13

Same

is this more xenophobia, brits are people too



except kesha spears

[swiftie13]

Originally posted by Vision

is this more xenophobia, brits are people too



except kesha spears

I'm xenophobic against Americans. Hunter is xenophobic against Delawareans (me).

[Temporal]

Wow @ me having all the charts ready. Only took me 90 minutes

[Cupid]

Originally posted by swiftie13

I'm xenophobic against Americans. Hunter is xenophobic against Delawareans (me).

I honestly thought Delaware and Tupperware were the same thing for years

I lowkey love Americans, southern redneck accents are my thing

same

[swiftie13]

NOT TUPPERWARE


and I have a cute gay/latino/southern accent love me

[Cupid]

idk what a latino accent is but I think latino men are beautiful



and southern is always good

[Temporal]

do my "y'all"s turn you on

[swiftie13]

my y'alls turn me on

y'all mean?