*Beyonce and Lady Gaga finally arrive. Beyonce has brought her daughter Blue Ivy with her. Jay-Z is nowhere to be found because ugly people are not allowed to enter (except for Kate Winslet and Ke$ha). Beyonce better guard Blue Ivy before Jolie's handlers steal her*
*P!nk's performance gets cut off* Announcer: From her latest smash movie, Part of Me in 3D, which managed to fill up every seat in the cinema, here is Katy Perry!