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Discussion: ATRL Songwriter's Thread | Jacktrus gain dual #1
Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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Well doodledot, they still need to declare me winner of Season 2
No, but I am one of the remaining contestants.
Oh, and since I feel like sharing
Across The Sky
[V1]
A long time ago
I had nowhere to go
I was alone
My soul was but a stone
It was then I heard someone
They told me I’m not done
Then they left without a sound
When I got up off the ground
[H]
There was my everything
All my hopes, I dared to dream
I picked them up off of the sand
[C]
And I took them all - sent them across the sky
After all, there’s not a reason why
Why I - Why I can’t reach that high
I’ll take this life of mine
I’ll make it so divine
Like stars across the sky
[V2]
I felt a spark
Inspiration from the heart
I took a breath
Looked ahead and took a step
It was then I saw the sky
And magic caught my eye
In a cloud, I saw a light
Right in my path of sight
[H]
There was my everything
All my hopes I dared to dream
I raised my palms up past the land
My dreams now in my hand
And I took them all - sent them across the sky
After all, there’s not a reason why
Why I - Why I can’t reach that high
I’ll take this life of mine
I’ll make it so divine
Like stars across the sky
[B]
Now I know where I will go
My own destiny
And I will leave my mark
If it means the death of me
In years to come I’ll have a legacy
Right now it’s dreams in my hand
And time in grains of sand
[C]
So I’ll take them all - send them across the sky
After all, there’s not a reason why
Why I - Why I can’t reach that high
I’ll take this life of mine
I’ll make it so divine
Like stars across the sky
Stars across the sky
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 1,878
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I thought the 4 of you were already declared winners
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 5/28/2011
Posts: 39,615
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A couple of songs I've written for AdamAL4's "Create a Label" game. They were written for Marina and the Diamonds to sing.
Needles and Pins
VERSE 1:
Why do I do all of this s**t?
Playing all these silly games
It's really a joke
No money, no love, certainly no fame
You're all I've ever needed
But she just had to step right in
She did her best
And of course, she would win
Things may never be how I wanted
But I'll f**king kill her if she tries it
PRE-CHORUS:
Don't talk to me in private
Then ignore me out on the town
Please forgive me for all of this..
I don't mean to be bitter,
I just want things badly, am I wrong?
CHORUS:
When you touch me, I want to scream
I don't think I'm going to be alright.
I just need you to grab my hand,
Perhaps a kiss goodnight.
I may seem like I'm cool,
But you give me needles and pins
I'm over here starving myself to look good
For you, I'd give it all to be perfectly thin
I'm not alright, I'm breaking inside
I can't take another break
I don't think my life can handle it this time.
VERSE 2:
Doing this has become pointless
Moving lifelessly, never living
My existence has become a leech
I take what I can get, I gave up on giving
A girl would take everything I tried so hard to build
I made what I could, she snatched it down
I'm a bitch, I can admit that
But me, I'll always wear the crown
She's meaningless and horrid
Now sit back and relax, no need to get worried
PRE-CHORUS:
Don't talk to me in private
Then ignore me out on the town
Please forgive me for all of this..
I don't mean to be bitter,
I just want things badly, am I wrong?
CHORUS:
When you touch me, I want to scream
I don't think I'm going to be alright.
I just need you to grab my hand,
Perhaps a kiss goodnight.
I may seem like I'm cool,
But you give me needles and pins
I'm over here starving myself to look good
For you, I'd give it all to be perfectly thin
I'm not alright, I'm breaking inside
I can't take another break
I don't think my life can handle it this time.
MIDDLE 8:
You never gave me a proper chance
What the f**k is wrong with you?
I tried to make you notice me then,
But you were too blind
Am I wrong to go and end her life
So you could notice... mine?
I'm so tired...
I don't know how much more I can take...
CHORUS:
I may seem like I'm cool,
(Can't you see me breaking on the inside?! I'm glass!)
But you give me needles and pins
(So much for charm...)
I'm over here starving myself to look good
(I can barely stand)
For you, I'd give it all to be perfectly thin
(Am I perfect like her?!)
I'm not alright, I'm breaking inside
I can't take another break
I don't think my life can handle it this time.
You f**ked it up, you didn't do the right thing...
And here, my love...
Is where it all ends.
Holy Woman
SPOKEN INTRO:
I'm not here for it to be this way
I'm not here for the wrong one
I'm here to be alive, and stay that way
But whatever it is, it must be done
VERSE 1:
Pretending to live doesn't make you alive
Ignoring the fire doesn't make the pain a lie
There's no real answer to your million questions
There's a thousand little lights spinning in their eternal torments
The little Hellish girl is whispering in my ear
Like it or not, the end of days is near
PRE-CHORUS:
There's a scream in the cellar that's not being heard
There's a f**ker in the attic with nothing to lose
There's people in my head talking about nothing
There's a woman in the closet swinging from a noose
There's countless troubles we're ignoring
And yet we play our games
And the skin is melting off of our flesh
CHORUS:
There's blood on the walls,
And people dead in the streets
Children talking backwards
And us between the sheets
There's nothing right about our lives
And certainly nothing right about you
That doesn't mean I can't have any fun
Are you into that, too?
I'm not your Holy woman
But I can be your sinful lover
The end is getting closer and closer
Might as well take cover
(Holy, holy, holy woman)
The end is getting closer and closer
Might as well take cover
(Holy, holy, holy woman)
I'M NOT YOUR HOLY WOMAN
VERSE 2:
There's nothing supernatural about the end
It's only fire, ice, water and the wind
Things are moving fast, too hard to see
We never get to just live, they won't let us be
Faster and faster, I think I'm going blind
Let me inside you, let me read your mind
PRE-CHORUS:
There's countless troubles we're ignoring
And yet we play our games
And the skin is melting off of our flesh
CHORUS:
There's blood on the walls,
And people dead in the streets
Children talking backwards
And us between the sheets
There's nothing right about our lives
And certainly nothing right about you
That doesn't mean I can't have any fun
Are you into that, too?
I'm not your Holy woman
But I can be your sinful lover
The end is getting closer and closer
Might as well take cover
(Holy, holy, holy woman)
The end is getting closer and closer
Might as well take cover
(Holy, holy, holy woman)
I'm not your holy woman
(Holy, holy, holy woman)
I'll be here for your demise
(Holy, holy, holy woman)
Running, that idea would be wise
(Sinner, sinner, sinning woman)
I'm not your perfect idol
(Sinful, sinner, sinning woman)
I'M NOT YOUR GOD DAMN HOLY WOMAN
MIDDLE 8:
Can we go back to the start?
Where everything wasn't apart?
Things were perfect, and everything was fine
On our souls, the evil ones will dine
Our lives are at stake, our souls to be taken
I've been telling you this forever, you refused to be awaken
The Holy Woman doesn't exist, she's only a fake
I've told you once, I've told you twice, it's only you they'll take...
CHORUS:
There's blood on the walls
(The evil ones are ready)
And people are dead in the streets
(I warned you)
Children talking backwards
(They know the truth)
And us between the sheets
(Make it our last)
There's nothing right about our lives
And certainly nothing right about you
(Are you one of them?)
That doesn't mean we can't have any fun
Are you into that, too?
(Are you dead yet?)
I'm not your Holy woman
But I can be your sinful lover
The end is getting closer and closer
(You never f**king listened)
Might as well take cover
(Holy, holy, holy woman)
The end is getting closer and closer
Might as well take cover
(Unholy, unholy, unholy bitch)
I'll be here for your demise
(Holy, holy, holy woman)
Running, that idea would be wise
(Sinful, sinful, sinful people)
I'm not your perfect idol
(Evil, evil, evil woman)
...
I'M NOT YOUR F**KING HOLY WOMAN
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Member Since: 9/15/2012
Posts: 22,487
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Quote:
Originally posted by Trouble.
AdamAL4
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hew
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Member Since: 10/18/2010
Posts: 29,224
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I think I'm gonna begin my next era: RhythmiCity. I finally found the concept I'm happy with.
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Member Since: 3/25/2012
Posts: 5,390
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Does anybody classify the songs they write into albums?? As in like they have songs that don't make the tracklist and start off some "imaginary" eras and stuff?? All I have are just lyrics so I hope I'm not the only one :dance:
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Member Since: 8/28/2012
Posts: 6,267
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Well I have a working title for my eventual debut album, "November Stars"
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 1,878
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Catchy tunes always pop inside my head. Too bad I can't play any musical instruments or use any music-making app
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Member Since: 10/18/2010
Posts: 29,224
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Some of y'all I wish we could collab... like on Skype or something...
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Member Since: 9/15/2012
Posts: 22,487
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Quote:
Originally posted by doodledot13
Catchy tunes always pop inside my head. Too bad I can't play any musical instruments or use any music-making app
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Record the melody with your phone or any other similar device as soon as the melody pops in your head so you don't forget it.
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Banned
Member Since: 2/12/2012
Posts: 9,586
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I never write anymore, I 'm not a good writer anyway!
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 1,878
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Quote:
Originally posted by AdamAL4
Record the melody with your phone or any other similar device as soon as the melody pops in your head so you don't forget it.
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Sounds like a good idea. I'll try
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Member Since: 10/18/2010
Posts: 29,224
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Quote:
Originally posted by SOTDH
I never write anymore, I 'm not a good writer anyway!
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Aww, that just means you need someone to look over your pieces and judge for themselves. When you doubt yourself, that means it's probably amazing work...
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Member Since: 3/15/2013
Posts: 5,981
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I....wrote something and I wanna share it it's the first verse only though but it's kind of stupid or teenish because I am a teen but idk sis it's so mediocre I've written songs before but they're either repetitive or unrealistic omg it's about the guy I like whos moving
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Member Since: 10/18/2010
Posts: 29,224
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I'll share my first verse if you'll share yours afterwards...
Imagine almost "rapping" this verse:
At first, was kinda skeptical
Was no protocol
To get to you
But from my past experiences told
There’s no need for me
To be so cruel
You may be broken, but I’m broken, too
You may take time, but I will be your glue
We’ll fix each other
Through the shatter
Of the matter
Doesn’t matter
If the chatter
Knows what we’ve gone through
Keep in mind, this is ONE VERSE in fifteen seconds... It was a mess trying to record it OVER AND OVER again, but I finally got it. Maybe I'll share it soon...
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Member Since: 3/15/2013
Posts: 5,981
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I have half of a hook but only two lines and they don't mesh together/it's short and plus having the overused and generic line in it "leave my sight" which doesn't make sense doesn't work for me
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Member Since: 3/15/2013
Posts: 5,981
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And my verse is short but maybe I can extend it Okay, lemme post...
[verse one]
you're beautiful, you know it's true,
But you got a girl, hurts but it's the truth,
You're wonderful, You make me laugh and smile,
But your leaving, can't you stay for a while?
excuse the crappiness tbh, the last line I don't know I'm a beginner so my things aren't really Hugamari/you/trouble level.
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Member Since: 10/18/2010
Posts: 29,224
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Let us see it...
We can help each other.
EDIT:
Okay, I have to say something really harsh. The first line, the first thing that came into my head was "You're Beautiful" by James Blunt. I don't know if that was intentional, but that's probably what a lot of people might hear when they see that line. It's acutally kinda cute. I see that it's simple, but sometimes simplicity in its rawest form can be beautiful. Have you tried using metaphors? They can convey such an art in music! Sorry, if this is too long...
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Member Since: 3/15/2013
Posts: 5,981
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I also wrote a song that doesn't even involve life experiences it just popped in my head and I wrote down that was really fast recorded it on my phone somewhere, it was hard to record because of that and plus I was freaking out a bit about something
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Member Since: 3/15/2013
Posts: 5,981
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Quote:
Originally posted by Nait Phoenix
Let us see it...
We can help each other.
EDIT:
Okay, I have to say something really harsh. The first line, the first thing that came into my head was "You're Beautiful" by James Blunt. I don't know if that was intentional, but that's probably what a lot of people might hear when they see that line. It's acutally kinda cute. I see that it's simple, but sometimes simplicity in its rawest form can be beautiful. Have you tried using metaphors? They can convey such an art in music! Sorry, if this is too long...
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Oh, that was unintentional Only metaphor I used (so far) was kinda generic tho Ik it's kinda cute bc I'm young and this is the only loveish thing I've experienced so far, I should switch it up a bit but I wanna keep the part about him having a girlfriend because it's well, the truth. thank you for the advice tho.
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