ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/11/2007
Posts: 63,796
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Quote:
Kyle: Hey Stan, did you see that rainbow this morning?
Stan: Yeah, it was huge.
Cartman: Heh, I hate those things.
Kyle: Nobody hates rainbows.
Stan: Yeah, what’s there to hate about rainbows?
Cartman: Well, you know, you’ll just be sitting there, minding your own business, and they’ll come, marching in and crawl up your leg and start biting the inside of your ass. And you’ll be all like, “hey, get out of my ass you stupid rainbows” [Silence]
Stan: Cartman, what the hell are you talking about?!?
Cartman: I’m talking about rainbows, I hate those frigging things!
Kyle: Rainbows are those little arches of color that show up during a rainstorm.
Cartman Ohh, rainbows, oh Yeah, I like those, those are cool.
Stan: What were you talking about?
Cartman: Heh, oh, nothing, forget it.
Kyle: No, what marches in, crawls up your leg and bites the inside of your ass?!?
Cartman: Nothing.
Mr. Garrison: Children, children. Remember the ‘Save Our Fragile Planet’ essay contest that you children worked so hard on last month? [Silence] One of our very own South Park students has won the national prize
Wendy: [softly] Wow, I knew I would win.
Mr. Hat: Gosh Mr. Garrison, this sure is exciting.
Mr. Garrison: That’s right Mr. Hat, the winner of the national ‘Save Our Fragile Planet’ contest is…Eric Cartman.
Wendy: What?
Cartman: What
Mr. Garrison: Congratulations Eric, on writing the award winning paper.
Cartman: Kick ass!
Stan: That’s impossible, Cartman doesn’t know a rain forest from a pop tart.
Cartman: Yeah I do, pop tarts are frosted.
Mr. Garrison: Out of over a million papers, Eric’s was chosen as the grand prize winner.
Kyle: Wow, what did you write about Cartman?
Cartman: Oh, you know, this and that.
Wendy: He doesn’t even know what he wrote about!
Kyle: What was your paper about Wendy?
Wendy: My paper was on the suffering of bottle nosed dolphins.
Cartman: There you see, you shouldn’t have written a paper about dolphins. Dolphins are stupid.
Stan: Dude, dolphins are like the second smartest animal on the planet.
Cartman: Buh, hah, right, if they’re so damn smart, how come they get caught in those fishing nets all the time?
Wendy: What?
Mr. Garrison: Wait, wait, there’s more. It says here that Eric’s trophy will be presented to him by…Kathie Lee Gifford.
Kyle: Kathie Lee is coming to South Park?
Mr. Garrison: And the presentation will be on national television.
Stan, Kyle: Television!
Mr. Garrison: [Thinking to himself] Kathie Lee Gifford. I don’t believe it.
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 im crying that i found a site where all the Scripts to each episode :weep: this is just season 1 episode 1, part 1.
its so wondeful.
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