Alright churren, it's time for a lot of clips and me rolling my eyes
Now note, I am trying to stick to the national final performance unless they have a better one of their nation did not have one, meaning I have to use the promo clip.
What it sounds like: Someone stubbing their toe set to drums Why it will win: It's absolutely insane and something this bizarre is only set for success. Why it will falter: Bulgaria didn't get out with a ****** rock song and missed out with a overwrought (but well done) ballad with histrionics. So what makes them think having 95 drums and a mouth flute and a woman screaming HEE every three words will work. Benefit of draw: It definitely will be one people remember, if only cuz she's shrieking. Problem: It's first and while Armenia pulled into the Finals with it, their song was miles better. And with it next to Israel's fellow insane number, it could be confused. Who it's gonna get votes from: Poland, Hungary, Czech Republic, Belarus, Russia Who's ignoring it: Hungary, Turkey, UK, Ireland, Spain, Andorra, Portugal Who they need to get points from: Iceland. Considering it's wicker man standing as a frontrunner and it's start position, it really needs western support for her hystronics.
02 - Israel - Teapacks - Push The Button
What it sounds like: What Heaven sounds like when on meth Why it will win: Did you hear the song? It's got pop, Hebrew rap, reggae, grunge rock and God only knows what else. Why it will falter: Did you hear the song? Everyone thinks its political and seriously it makes no damn sense, especially the rap sequence. Benefit of draw: Considering it comes before Cyprus' poor attempt at Kylie and after Bulgaria's histrionics, it will be well-considered, methinks. Problem: It's #2 in order, so it has no shot of making the finals. And the "politics" could make it a non-issue early. Who it's gonna get votes from: UK, Ireland, Spain, France, Germany, Russia, Georgia Who's ignoring it: Finland, Sweden, Norway, Serbia, Montenegro, Croatia Who they need to get points from: Turkey. They do trade votes but it may be needed more now to offset those against the "politicalness" of the song as well as the fact that it needs all the help it can get to escape the #2 trap.
03 - Cyprus - Evridiki - Comme Ci Comme Ça
What it sounds like: A poor man's Kylie doing a poor man's Killer song. In French Why it will win: Besides the customary 12 from Greece, it will snatch French votes for the twist on language. Why it will falter: It drags towards the end with the constant "comme ci comme ca" repetition, it's not that good of a beat. Benefit of draw: It's the first true dance song of the night and it could benefit from the strong internet push for it. Problem: No #3 slot has made it out of the Semis and this isn't strong enough to pull it off this year. Plus Switzerland is close enough in order to show how a true dance song is performed Who it's gonna get votes from: France, Greece, Romania, Switzerland Who's ignoring it: Serbia, Montenegro, Albania, Austria Who they need to get points from: Slovenia. A vote from the Mafia can help more than they know.
04 - Belarus - Koldun - Work Your Magic
*note the Belarus performance was **** and horribly clipped, this is from the Cypriot presentation. One of approximately 75 National Finals he's been to since winning the Belarus contest)
What it sounds like: "Never Let You Go" from last years Eurovision (Russia) with a Bond beat. Why it will win: It sounds like Russia's song from last year, it's not that horrible, Why it will falter: He looks like Ashlee Simpson pre-nose job, it's a ripoff of Bond and Russia's entry, people listen to the lyrics. Is it dance, is it rock, is it a ballad? Benefit of draw: It might be considered by many as the first "good" song after screaming, a "novelty" song and a French number done screamingly. Problem: Between Cyprus' Kylie impression and the English-fied version of the Icelandic Rock Ballad, it could miscue based on the dancing and the fact he'll have to sing live (he's lipped everywhere but Ireland, I think) Who it's gonna get votes from: Russia, Ukraine, Georgia, Armenia, Estonia Who's ignoring it: Latvia, Lithuania, UK, Ireland, Spain, Finland Who they need to get points from: Norway. Since the song is almost schlager, it needs some Scandi love to make sure he's not Kate Ryan'd
Come Friday we get Iceland, newbies Georgia and fellow newbies Montenegro. Iceland has their song in English, Georgia retitled their song and Montenegro is going English as well. Any contenders?
I think we'll be heading to Moscow for the '08 Edition of the contest. They should wedge their way into the Swedish/Swiss/Ukraine/Romania debate on who's winning this sucker. More when we get to the finalists.
*using the video since his perf at the Icelandic finals is in Icelandic and he's doing the song come Helsinki in English*
What it sounds like: 80s power anthem done by your grandpa Why it will win: For a rock song, it's an interesting twist, it's a decent ballad, Iceland is due for a win, lots of guitars on stage. Why it will falter: It's a plodding ballad that takes too long to get to the good stuff. Benefit of draw: It's the first rock song of the night, so it could benefit from rock fatigue later on. Problem: It gets stuck between two projected finalists (and threats to make their countries broke by hosting the thing) so this may get forgotten without something more than the four guitarists in the middle of the stage that he did in Reykjavik. Who it's gonna get votes from: Norway, Sweden, Finland, Denmark, Ireland, UK Who's ignoring it: Montenegro, Croatia, FYR Macedonia Who they need to get points from: Albania. Easy catch with a rockish ballad but needs some Eastern help
06 - Georgia - Sopho Khalvashi - Visionary Dream
What it sounds like: Poppy Bjork with some some early 90s industrialism Why it will win: Did you hear the song? She can sing her face off, the song is rather excellent, the melody is excellent. Why it will falter: Rather frantic beat for the Eurovision crowd, may not get enough support from Russia and other Soviet satellites due to their poor relations. If she does bring the pink tent, good chance people will be lost. Benefit of draw: Between two rock songs. And with the tent, we won't forget. Problem: Its on rather early and I'm concerned that people WILL forget it, since she plans on leaving her circus at home. Who it's gonna get votes from: UK, Ireland, Iceland, Finland, Slovenia, Switzerland, Sweden Who's ignoring it: Russia, Ukraine, Armenia, Belarus Who they need to get points from: Poland. I think a Soviet ignore could occur due to the poor relations between Georgia and Russia (but with some Baltic breakage) so some votes from the central areas combined with expected Western love for the Bjorkyness should get her in easy.
07 - Montenegro - Stevan Faddy - Adje Kroci
What it sounds like: If the Miami Sound Machine backed Nickelback on one of their "dirty" rock songs. Why it will win: It's a nonoffensive rock song - it's rock in the vaguest sense of the term (there's guitars on stage) and unlike Lordi's awesomeness this can appeal to more than teen girls which it is clearly aimed at. Why it will falter: It's the weakest of the rock numbers in the semis - Iceland, Croatia, Czech Republic, Estonia (sorta), Andorra. He points a lot and has weird eyebrows. It sounds more dated than Iceland's number and in rock terms is spiraling backwards. Benefit of draw: It's early enough to help aid teen girls to speed dial for him. Problem: Only one rock song and only one true newbie is making into the Finals. The rock is from Andorra, the newbie performs right in front. More than likely forgotten by Georgia's and Switzerland's stage show. Who it's gonna get votes from: Croatia, Bosnia & Herzegovina, Slovenia, FYR Macedonia, Albania. Who's ignoring it: Georgia, Armenia, Israel, Greece, Finland, Sweden, Norway Who they need to get points from: Serbia. I'm rather skiddish in thinking they ended nicely but it will lead to resentment by Mother Serbia and they will need all the Balkans to have a shot at the finals.
08 - Switzerland - DJ Bobo - Vampires Are Alive
*Internal selection, this is from...I think...the Swiss Lotter presentation.*
What it sounds like: Something Romania would send in 2000. Why it will win: It's got a catchy hook - VAM-PY-RES! - and the stage show for it will get people interested. Why it will falter: Is 90s dance still viable? Will Eastern Europe trust him again after being told he was making a song for them? Benefit of draw: This will be a memorable stage show regardless of start. Problem: It's on way too early. Probably more of a lock than I'd suggest (4th in pecking order after Croatia, Serbia and Malta) but a later position would help it immensely. Could vie off against Georgia if Sopho brings more to entertain the masses. Who it's gonna get votes from: UK, Spain, Austria, Germany, Serbia, FYR Macedonia, Turkey, Greece Who's ignoring it: Bosnia & Herzegovenia, Iceland, Finland, Czech Republic Who they need to get points from: Sweden. This dance number will need some extra push to solidify it's final slot.
Tuesday has 9-12 in the pecking order: Moldova, Netherlands, Albania and Denmark. otherwise: chick rock, pop, ethno-ballad-screamer and a drag act. Stay tuned!
Just heard that the UK chose to go novelty this year - in their superfinal they chose Scooch's "Flying The Flag" over Cyndi's ballad "I'll leave My Heart" although they had announced Cyndi won first. ****** behavior to change who's repping when announced and I do feel bad for poor Cyndi but sending Scooch is by far the funniest thing I have heard all year, and I love the Ukraine song.
So we have a Ukrainian drag act, followed by flight attendants, followed by Love In Six Languages. Put the Swiss in slot 17 and Denmark in at #21 and that will be the most confusing and insane section of Eurovision ever!
And to CBS - I DON'T CARE ABOUT TAMU AND LOUISVILLE! SHOW ME PITT/VACOMM >
I think The Ark merged schlager with some good ole boogie-woogie and some glamour rock, it just seems so calculated to me. And is it me or is one of the guitarists on stage the guy from Styx?
(1) Scooch used live backstage vocals. Big deal. Brian Harvey still can't sing and the problem with Justin & Beverlie's perf was clearly Justin. Big Brovas was a mess. However, the scandal should push the Scoochers to a top-10 debut with digital sales, methinks. Yay!
(2) Russia's Serebro lead girl is friggen fug. Maybe it's the gap in the tetth or her stringy hair but she appears to have escaped from The Grudge. Still one hot as hell song.
(3) Irish betters say Germany and Israel are the ones to beat. British betters have a Swede, Russian, Ukrainian, Greek and Belorussian top 5 expectations. Both raised the chances of the UK win and lessened the belief of a second nul-pointer.
and now...back to the entries!
09 - Moldova - Natalia Barbu - Fight
*Official and final video for the song. I tried to find the "live" perf from Mision Eurovision but failed...*
What it sounds like: Evanescence as done by Gina Glocksen. Why it will win: It's a moodier rock song with a message. Better than Montenegro or Iceland's tries! She's rather fetching and it could have a Greece '06 stage feel. Why it will falter: Estonia's quasi-rock song comes on much later and will more than likely be remembered. Will she play the violin on stage? Benefit of draw: She'll easily outclass the other rock-pop number from Montenegro and is ahead of three fellow strugglers to qualify. Problem: She comes on after Vampires. Who it's gonna get votes from: 12 from Romania, Ukraine, Armenia, Georgia Who's ignoring it: Sweden, Iceland, Denmark, Norway Who they need to get points from: Someone out west. Probably the UK or Finland. It's a weird rockish ballad and it will get lost between Estonia and the Balkan rockers and will need Western support to help its cause.
10 - Netherlands - Edsilia Rombley - On Top Of The World
*She did it in Dutch at the "National Final" that was really a Lets See What She Wants To Sing Showcase. This is the radio rip of the English laid over her doing the song in Dutch there. The new vid is out and I shall switch as soon as it's youtube'd*
What it sounds like: Anastacia's "I'm Outta Love" but with a happy ending Why it will win: If this was still a song contest this would place high since it's actually a good pop song. Why it will falter: If the staging is as dodgy as she did it on the Showcase, she's in for some problems. Benefit of draw: Between two rock songs. And with the tent, we won't forget. Problem: The poppiness would do better later on, right here it runs a high risk of being forgotten, especially with Albania coming afterwards. Who it's gonna get votes from: UK, France, Belguim, Germany Who's ignoring it: Russia, Serbia, Bulgaria, Hungary Who they need to get points from: Switzerland. This one is gonna need all the western support it can get, cuz I sense the east will ignore it.
11 - Albania - Frederick Ndoki - Hear My Plea
*Was in Albanian and longer than hell. Now in English and under time*
What it sounds like: What you'd expect Albania to send? Why it will win: Best melody in the contest. Aida (his wife) does some arias and it sounds lovely. It's a pleasant enough and solid ballad and we're bound to have at least one make the finals and I prefer this one. Why it will falter: He looks like the Serbian singer, and she's a lady. The song plods along for about a half hour before it gets to the good part, which HE CUT and made worse. The song sounds better in Albanian. Benefit of draw: Between pop and drag. Problem: Serbia is rather close to the song as well and that one is not in English. Expected bottom finish for the song.
[b]Who it's gonna get votes from: FYR Macedonia, Montenegro, Bosnia & Herzegovenia, Greece, Turkey Who's ignoring it: Slovenia, Sweden, UK, Iceland Who they need to get points from: Portugal. The ethno-rhythms help with votes but it really needs western backing. Portugal likes ballads and schlager so some high points there could help.
12 - Denmark - DQ - Drama Queen
*Believe it or not, this is the performance at the National Final!*
What it sounds like: Something Sweden would send...but with feathers! Why it will win: Catchy schlager and he (I think he prefers to be referred to as a he) can nail the big notes. Why it will falter:Considering it missed the Finals originally and only made it through from the second chance, a big question will be how accessible it will be. Can there be a spot for a second drag queen in the finals? Will there be snow in Helsinki so the lyrics make sense Benefit of draw: In front of a drollish rock ballad and after a slow etno-ballad made shine just right for the glitter. Problem: No song has made the finals from the 12 slot. Who it's gonna get votes from: Norway, Sweden, Iceland, Finland, UK Who's ignoring it: Russia, Belarus, Turkey Who they need to get points from: Ukraine. Sure they share drag queen love but the east may reject the schlager sounds, especially since Verda is gonna be a memorable performance in the Finals. A shot for the finals goes through Kyiv.
Friday brings a rock ballad from Croatia, a nightmare from Poland, a plonky ballad from Serbia and a Lordi rewind from the Czechs!
I just wanted to send a note about the NCAA Tournament. See, what I and probably everyone but the teams involved want to see involves:
* A 1 seed falling in the second round
* A 10 or so sneaking into the Elite 8
* A 2 getting a Cinderella Heel in the heiney
* A small school everyone complains that should not be there show it's moxie and impress the big guns
* Double-overtime. Especially if it involves a 5/12
* Two 12s in the second round
* Schools you've never heard of jamming on the floor
Instead, you've given us...boring...boring...oh, a rally by Ohio State...ooh, an upset by a 7!
See, I'm sorry, but the notion of 3 1v2 games in the Elite 8 and a fourth #1 facing a 3 isn't interesting. Even if all 4 1s lose. No I don't wanna see Kansas and UCLA in San Jose. No, I don't wanna see Comeback State against Overrated And Damn Lucky Memphis. And if Florida, Oregon, UNC AND Georgetown win tomorrow...ugh.This is boring as hell and dashes the hopes that last year brought to the table.
Hell, when the WOMEN'S TOURNEY is more topsy-turvey than yours, it's time to ignore ya! So see ya
Hugs And Firey Destruction,
Mikal
P.S. Air Force for the NIT AND THE FROZEN FOUR BABY!
P.S.S. VANDY/UNLV FOR THE WIN. CUZ THIS IS BORIN' YA'LL!