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Discussion: Your Coming Out...
ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 1/2/2014
Posts: 5,161
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Quote:
Originally posted by electrastan
Well I go to uni to a different town and I live on my own
So like I'm out of the closet here, everybody knows about me, I don't hide it
My parents don't know it. They've always been suspicious ever since some asshole anonymously texted my mom telling her I'm gay (which was a sick thing to do since I was only 15 and hell broke loose) and she asked me if I was gay so she could take me to a doctor and fix this and just no. I don't know how I am ever going to tell them that I'm gay.
My friends took it very well. My best friend thought it was nothing, every friend of mine took it so well it kinda flowed. I mean, we spend so much time together every day. My friend told me that she sees it as a part of life which is kinda true I guess. I really think that, if you really wanna know how the gay thing works you have to spend A LOT of time with a gay person.
My sister knows it too. She was really supportive, never told anyone a thing. But my parents man, ah. I don't even know how to handle them. They're so close minded, they think being gay is a sickness. It's so sad cos they're the most wonderful parents on the parent and that's what makes it suck so much. I mean, like if they were bad parents I'd be like "yah ok fak it" but it's like they're so good but SO close goddamn minded.
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 94
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Omg i read all the stories, you are so strong and brave! Some stories are really funny omg
I only came out with all my best friends and sister that is lesbian 
My sister said 'OMG AND HOW CAN WE SAY IT TO DAD NOW?' 
My best friend discovered because i answered a question on ask.fm about having sex with a little monster and she said : YOU ARE SO STUPID, YOU ARE JERK, YOU ARE SO FANTASTIC, WHY DIDN'T U TELL ME THAT BEFORE?? I love her
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Banned
Member Since: 3/3/2012
Posts: 13,073
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I actually wish my parents would have been supportive.
Maybe one day the sun will come out after the storm.
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 2,408
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Quote:
Originally posted by GiovanniArenaLM
Omg i read all the stories, you are so strong and brave! Some stories are really funny omg
I only came out with all my best friends and sister that is lesbian
My sister said 'OMG AND HOW CAN WE SAY IT TO DAD NOW?'
My best friend discovered because i answered a question on ask.fm about having sex with a little monster and she said : YOU ARE SO STUPID, YOU ARE JERK, YOU ARE SO FANTASTIC, WHY DIDN'T U TELL ME THAT BEFORE?? I love her |
lol my sister is a lesbian too but i'm scared that she's gonna tell my mother 
Having 2 children, daughter and a son, both liking same sex.. I don't know how she's gonna take it.
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Member Since: 3/15/2013
Posts: 43,126
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My mum and i had our usual fights, after that we talked and she asked me if i was gay. That was some months ago 
I am not out to anyone else. I am way too scared 
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 39,572
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Never happened, hopefully never will 
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Member Since: 4/26/2007
Posts: 15,585
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Quote:
Originally posted by Save-Me-Nialler
OMG this  i haven't had a girl friend sense 9th grade when i wouldn't accept it i'm on my junior year at college now my excuse is i'm only focusing on school. But if i EVER (it might be never) try coming out again i will have my significant other next to me cause i know i cannot have that rejection i had the first time
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I know I will need a lot of support when the moment comes, but I feel kind of sad at the moment, my bf and I broke up this sunday after almost a year of relationship, and the reason was because he wanted me to tell my parents about it, because he didn't like to keep the relationship as a secret, and I refused to do so.
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Member Since: 8/17/2013
Posts: 20,947
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Well my mom found a magazine under my sheets (which I didn't even remember it was there  ) and then she asked me and it was very messy, I was very pissed she just bluntly asked that and she wasn't even prepared to hear it.  She kept thinking it would change the way we view things as human, what everyone from the family would think and I told her I couldn't do anything about it. I was like ''yes I'm gay just deal with it''. It was all very messy and exhausting. That was a bit more than year ago. December this year I told her I hooked up with a boy and she acted like CRAZY, like she wasn't aggressive or anything but it was so weird. I thought she would come to terms with it by now, obviously I was wrong.
Those were the only bad experiences regarding this subject. I told my 2 best friends in 2011 and they didn't even care (it was weird because it was my first time telling anyone that and I was a bit shaky and weepy but w/e), then I told some other friends during a Truth or Dare game ( ) and it all spread out from there. Now all of them know and they don't care either, some people that aren't really closed to me know it too, I'm sort of happier now because of all of this.
My sister doesn't know (well she probably does but I ain't gonna tell her), and she can go to hell, I hate her retarded ass. My dad doesn't know either, idk how I'm supposed to tell him though  He lives with another woman and honestly we aren't very close, eh.
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 1,123
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The first person I ever confessed anything remotely related to being gay was the first gay person I ever met. I was 18 and he was 16. He came out to me, and I told him I thought I was bisexual. Kind of a cop out, I know. I was too freaked out though. Where I live, being LGBT is difficult and I never considered the idea of coming out. He was the first person I could relate to, and that wasn't something I was able to respond to.
Almost two years later, I was still deeply closeted. My best friend is really amazing about LGBT equality and I still couldn't tell her. One night, I just felt like I was living a lie. I guess the pressure got too much. I sorta told her I had to tell her something. I still couldn't say it though. She sort of got a clue, and asked me if I was gay. I told her I didn't know how to answer the question. She was really awesome about it. We spent countless nights talking about it. Eventually I became a lot more comfortable.
I started telling people a few months later. Over the last three months I've told everyone important to me. They've all been great about it.
Telling my parents is a completely different story though. I was meeting this guy I like (coincidentally, the same guy who I ever told anything to). Let's just say I got really drunk. I came back home and puked and sort of blacked out. My neck was also covered with hickeys. 
My parents asked me about the next day. I sort of told them who they were from. They went really quiet. They said they didn't approve. I sort of yelled at them about how it took me a long time to get comfortable and how they couldn't change me. I left for Uni then. Over the next week they got some counseling done. They're slowly coming to terms with it and they did say they wouldn't try to change it. That's good I think.
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Member Since: 8/18/2013
Posts: 18,555
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ddd; at first I had friends over and my laptop on and they locked me out of my room and looked through my Tumblr dash. Not friends with them anymore. 
And to the whole school I kinda got v drunk at a party and told everyone lmao. No one really cared 
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 1,302
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Quote:
Originally posted by rihCanna
I'm still in the closet hehe!
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Member Since: 3/18/2012
Posts: 15,751
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Member Since: 8/18/2013
Posts: 18,555
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Oh I'm also pretty sure my brother knows cus he told me he "knew what happened" with me when I was at a music festival (some of the ppl who were there were friends w him, + I ended up in a tent w s1). So that's how he found out
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Member Since: 8/7/2010
Posts: 9,646
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I was like 12. I think like grade 6?
My mom, my sister, and I were watching tv and like earlier that day, my male friends got mad at me because I didn't wanna play soccer with them that day and instead gossip with the gurls. (mess  )
One of them kept saying he's a ****** so that's why his gay ass wont play with us anymore.
That stuck in my mind all throughout the day. I went to a Catholic school at that point, and my parents didn't really explain or even care to explain that there were gay people in the family. It was just love to them.
That comment stuck with me throughout the day, so I asked my mom what a ****** was.
She told me not to use the word, but she did explain that it was hurtful and used to describe men who are attracted to other men. And I was like oh, I guess I am a ****** then. (  )
She was like WHAT?! She kinda freaked out and took me to my dad's study. She explained what went on to my father. Dad was like oh, that's fine. You brought him in here to tell me he was gay? That's it?
Soooooo yeah. My mom was more shocked by it by my dad, but they both accept it.
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Member Since: 3/25/2012
Posts: 10,673
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Quote:
Originally posted by Save-Me-Nialler
But they haven't My mom also kinda gave me a chance when were were talking about how my job gave me the oppertunity to be more social and she said It helped you come out your closet I swear i almost died
But the fact that you have no1 really is sad we're here for you  |
mess. I hope they come around eventually then. Baby steps are still progress at the end of the day.
And thank you I'm lucky enough to have at least a small support group in my small clique of friends that do know. Who knows, maybe one day I'll have the courage to tell my parents at the very least. These days I don't really deny it if someone asks, but it's just not something I feel like I should have to shout from the rooftops. If straights don't have to, why should I? I just use the classic "education comes first" excuse.
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 2,773
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I came out to my mom first when I was 13 and she thought I was joking cuz I never showed any signs :/ when she realized I was serious, we cried and got closer. Now I'm 21 and we talk about love, sex and everything in between. Love ha!
Told my brothers after that and they were just like "oh." Lol. My sister thought it was weird at first but now we bond over sharing our experiences but we are not as tight as we should be in my mind. My father found out by the HUGE hicky on my neck I came home with when I came from a friends house, which was my first bf at the time and I was 14 lmao. My mom caught on FAST and she was like "oh my God that rash! Yes that rash, let's put cream on it."
My father and I won't talk about it, which is fine by me, but for my 21st bday he got me a card saying he loves me for who I am and he's proud of me and it made me cry tbh. As for everyone else in life, I'm STILL having to come out little by little because either they can't tell or they think I'm joking!
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 3,144
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"Hey dad, I'm gay."
"Yeah, we've known since you were three."
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Member Since: 3/8/2011
Posts: 3,432
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I'm not gay but read through these stories and I just wanna say wow and well done for being brave 
It made me feel sad how some of you were treated. If I ever have children I hope they grow up knowing that I would love them no matter what.
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Member Since: 1/2/2014
Posts: 357
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My coming out as a whole was a bit boring. It's not like I was in denial or some **** like that. The only problem was my dad. I used to tell him everything and one day when was about 11 or 12 (not sure) I just told him and his reaction was just OK. Nothing more than that. It took me a few years to realise that he was supporting me from that day despite my suspicions that he was a bit of a homophobe. But at least with my friends and my sisters I had no such misunderstandings. They were very supportive from day 1 and I don't it affected our relations in any shape or form.
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Member Since: 6/18/2012
Posts: 18,768
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I came out like 5 months ago only. I was 18.
My mom was in the livingroom watching TV and i was in my room. I sent her a text saying something like, "Mom, can i tell you something?", then she text back, "yes." And i said, "I like boys," then she text, "You mean you're gay?" After that, i came out of my room into the livingroom and hugged her and cried, etc. She told me it's okay. She loves me no matter what. Whoever i love and whatever i want to do, i can do it.
But she still questioned me after that if i really loves guys. But we made it clear now.
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