1. Bey Admired - You and Me
I'll start by saying I think you nailed the challenge. Structurally, this was all there. However, the lyrics were just wrought with clichés with little nuance to them. There was too much telling and not enough showing if that makes sense; without any metaphors, images, motifs, and an overuse of simple lyrics, the whole thing came off as bland. Some of the rhymes were forced as well and those lines were super distracting ("Lets go for dinner / Just don't forget your sense of humour"). I didn't get why the love needed to be "confidential" either (again, that lyric felt like you were just filling the rhyme); there wasn't any depth to this piece either. I thought the play with "scortese" was interesting at least, and the "solidify" line was cute.
2. Tymps - Pee a Little
Okay, your first rhyme was the equivalent of "winner winner chicken dinner." Besides that, I thought this was an interesting mix of solid lyrics and the wonderfully salacious. "I need your **** more than I need a father!" was pretty brilliant while the third verse was actually kinda pretty? The outro was pretty funny too, but I wanted a stronger refrain than "I pee a little." If you make it to Round 3 I would want to see you go balls to the wall and write a cupcakke level, traumatically hilarious song, though.
3. OreGuy - Inside of You
I'm sorry, but this entry was littered with inconsistencies, both grammatically and thematically. If you're going to write a song about ****ing behind the bushes, I don't think romanticizing it would be the right way to cover it. If you wanted to write it in a really romantic style anyway, you should've written this piece as a double entendre so that the REAL meaning would've been hidden behind flowery lyrics. The pre-chorus was pretty useless lyrically, both in terms of actual substance and because it was cliché (side note, "shadows" should've been plural), while the second verse had tense issues ("feel" not "felt). Was "will" in the second pre-chorus supposed to be "we'll" as well? The second chorus was really weird, with the girl saying "I don't feel," and then the immediate next line being the male asking "Tell me what you feel." Like, she just did? That section was terribly awkward to read. "We're gonna cruise the mountains" doesn't make sense either (Should've been "cruised over" or "cruised through" for example), and why did you decide to throw in a plot twist and not elaborate on it in the bridge? "And after what you did to me / I am better off alone," you can't just through that couplet in without contextualizing it, because you gave us nothing to understand what the male lead did to her, and why she suddenly decided to bring it up now while they're fornicating. The outro just kept up with this seemingly random mood change but was even more sporadic.
4. Vision - Field of Emeralds
BYE at that plot twist, I screamed a bit. In the future, please label the sections of your song - verse, chorus, bridge, pre-chorus, etc. - though this time your entry was straightforward enough that it didn't alter my reading of the song. I didn't get exactly what the "fields of emerald green" were on the first read through (I thought it was a metaphor for something) but going through it again I was really blown away at how you made a really unconventional story work so well with your lyrics. The plot was super dark but your prose made this read like a classic folk song. "Her green eyes were full of life / Like river-banks growing wild" was an unexpectedly great parallel. I think you should've made the murder scene a little less direct (specifically the "hands [around] her neck" lyric), something that an adult would understand but would go over a child's head (think "Ring Around the Rosey"). There were moments when the style got too stiff, however, specifically "I asked 'Want to see the roses / and lay in the fields that glow?'" and "Oh so magic and moody." Overall this was a really nice entry.
5. E-Raine - Pandora's Box
Definitely an improvement from last week lyrically. You had some nice moments - the third stanza of the first verse - but overall the flow and the song itself was too choppy. The chorus was scattered metrically and thematically: the "eenie meenie mynie mo" was too campy, I didn't get what the "set core of temptation" was, and the flow overall just wasn't there. "Outside on a mat" was a SUPER forced rhyme, the image was really jarring and the rhyme was too perfect (it's very hard to make perfect rhymes feel natural in lyricism). I think you missed the challenge, though, unfortunately. Even in your title you said rap/sung collaboration, and the way you structured this, it wasn't really an effective duet. You had one stanza in each verse where the singer and rapper communicated, but overall this was too reliant on the rapper as the storyteller and main artist.
6. KeshasFansRose - Rough Love
This was all over the place. The lyrics and images were often disjointed, the chorus was super cliche and you were too blunt as some points and not clear enough in others. As a fully fleshed out Pop song, this might've made more sense, but the lyrics by themselves don't stand well on their own.
7. Nait Phoenix - Fighting
Here's my thing on typos, if the typo doesn't change the reading of the song - i.e. you misspelled a word instead of writing a completely different one - I won't knock you for it. However, when you write a completely different lyric instead, it becomes a problem. It should be "Past" my skin, not "Pass"! Overall this was too straightforward and simple. There weren't any ideas, images, or metaphors here to latch on to, or in the case of the "war," it wasn't developed enough, while the rhymes were really predictable and bland ("know/go", "me/me", "clear/here"). The only line that had any nuance was, ironically enough, the skin line. That said, there wasn't anything egregious here either, except for potentially the meter in the beginning being really wonky (the first verse specifically).
8. Xedretinz Lododnz - Sad Goodbye
You had a rhyme scheme technically, but ABCDEABCDE is such a long one you might as well not have had one at all while there were a number of grammatical errors as well. That made this song read like a translation, as opposed to one with a meter and rhyme scheme. I have no idea what you were trying to say with "our love won't gone too strong", "I hope I have never fell for you" is in a similar boat, while smaller grammatical errors like "Will we ever find the love we’re searching?" (should be "searching for") and "If you just tell the reason why" (should be something like "if you just tell ME the reason why") held this piece back as well. I highly recommend sending your entries to other contestants for grammar checks, because I can tell English isn't your first language, and it's super hard to write a functioning piece of literature in a language other than your native tongue.
9. Urban & Navyofbadgals - Dark Room
"Do you know what it’s like being left in a dark room" bitch you did NOT just rip off the opening line of Demetria Devone Lovato's "This is Me" practically verbatim The chorus fit the tune of that song's scarily well also Anyways, conceptually I really liked this. It was a really interesting image for a duet. However, it lacked depth (why are they suicidal? The plot was really shallow and didn't develop at all). Execution wise, this read a little bit more like a monologue than a song: the structure of the chorus and the song, in general, was really jarring; without a set rhyme scheme or meter it was hard to get a feel for the song.
10. mxtthewdelrey - Prayer Pose
The improvement, my god! This was a really fun piece, and you had some really great moments here: "Your body is a temple / So let me be the priest" was a low-key brilliant lyric; a really great lyrical play. But oh my god, PLEASE tell me "I want to taste your power on my pillow / Your gold desire taking me to places only we know" isn't a piss play reference. Besides that, I think this should've been a little more colloquial in some spots: "You whisper all your fantasies so dirty" (inverted sentences are kinda gross), and "I want to be a slave for your love all night" ("wanna" would've been a nice replacement here, that line was a bit stiff). Some lyrics fell flat as well: "Play with me like your toy" (not very imaginative), "We’re turning every night together into a game" (detracted from the religious themes), "What’s your name? I like your smile" (wasn't very dirty, a forced rhyme with "while" and the line itself felt random). I really hope you can defeat your R1 score because I'd love to see what else you can offer!
11. Moonchild & conatus - This Is How It Ends
Wow @ Victory Road's impact! I got a lot of flashbacks to it from this. Anyways, an entry with super solid meter and flow was so refreshing. It made this a really relaxing read. You both did a nice job painting the scene, and the basics were all there, so I just have nitpicks mainly. The style got a little bit dense at points - "I’ve no reason to remain" - and in general I think this was a bit too imagery heavy, sans the bridge. The length of the lines didn't help with the density issue either; I think you used your words carefully but there were just so many of them in each line! The "fiddle" line in the first verse stuck out as not supporting the war/Rome theme you both set up, but that was the only line that broke the image. "Caesar heart" could've been Caesarian heart instead, but I didn't think that as a major issue either. This isn't something I'd take off for either, but something I should just point out: the style and song overall felt very Moonchild heavy. For your next entries, I'd like to see you try to do more with less.
12. lovesong & Hugamari - The Life I Could've Known
Wow @ Village by the Mountain's impact! The development of the story and the unconventional plot reminded me of it. I'd be shocked if any of the other entries got as creative as you did with your structure, so for that, I commend you both. I also don't know WHY I didn't picture your styles together before, it blends super well. That being said, the development of the plot was a bit predictable (the letter in the ashes felt really trite as well). The concept of an orphan or adopted child looking for answers about their family and discovering that their parent(s) did, in fact, love them is kinda boring. There wasn't anything new being brought to that story, and there was a big lack of backstory. Your execution outside of that, however, was pretty spotless. "Leave me in this divide / Between two identities" Was definitely my favorite lyric, so kudos to whoever wrote that one!
13. Musickid203 & Lucky#17 - Venom
It was a bunch of small problems throughout that held this back as a whole. I don't get how body language can be "imprecise," the tense in the first stanza of the second verse shifted from past to present (I wasn't sure about "sit" instead of "sat" in the first verse either), "destructive armageddon" was redundant, and the super literal use of "pool of your pleasure" was weird (and cracking your head on it was an overly gory image to use). I think overall the use of similies and parallels was just off, which might have been because this entry struggled with too many adjectives that either didn't make sense or weren't needed. (ex. "passionate mind," "wicked masquerade," and the aforementioned "destructive armageddon"). That, in combination with really colloquial lines - "You move quick like the wind through my goldie-locks / Seems that brunette gives you more than what I've got" made this lopsided stylistically. Still, I think this is a stepping stone towards a really strong entry down the road.
14. TheCheetahWings & MattyTacos - 1955
BIIIIIITCH. I loved this! The concept was so cute yet so devastating Lyrically this was just punch after punch as well Though I was 95% scalped, the remaining hairs on my head were "kaleidoscopic vision" (why that adjective? It felt random), the overly dramatic circus metaphor, and the first line of the chorus felt redundant with the first verse and the last line of the chorus. Still, really nice job.
15. Tylerbv - Square One
Really nice concept, and a solid execution. Definitely an improvement over your last entry. The "you're mine I guess" was a bit too comedic with all the prose around it, while "And brought promise and desire back into my life" was too direct. The chorus, in general, was a little too direct as well, though I really liked the middle two stanzas. I didn't like the repition of "meaning" back to back with "That we first exchanged our meaningful vows/ But somewhere along the line they lost their meaning." One word swap would've made that a much stronger lyric for me. Continue down this path, and continue to add little details to your lyrics, and you'll be golden.
14. TheCheetahWings & MattyTacos - 1955
BIIIIIITCH. I loved this! The concept was so cute yet so devastating Lyrically this was just punch after punch as well Though I was 95% scalped, the remaining hairs on my head were "kaleidoscopic vision" (why that adjective? It felt random), the overly dramatic circus metaphor, and the first line of the chorus felt redundant with the first verse and the last line of the chorus. Still, really nice job.
I'm glad you liked it so much Really appreciate it.
My critical acclaim era being over. It was a nice run. I'm guessing it got like a 7. I can see where you're coming from, though. It'd be a bit morbid to have their parent hate them hytojvbgfl
bitch I colour coded it and you pm'd me and told me it was fine
sabotage!
That was for the voices in your song, not for the structural parts of it! I should've told you that anyways though, whoops. I didn't take off for that though so chill fat
My critical acclaim era being over. It was a nice run. I'm guessing it got like a 7. I can see where you're coming from, though. It'd be a bit morbid to have their parent hate them hytojvbgfl
The chorus fit the tune of that song's scarily well also 
Anyways, conceptually I really liked this. It was a really interesting image for a duet. However, it lacked depth (why are they suicidal? The plot was really shallow and didn't develop at all). Execution wise, this read a little bit more like a monologue than a song: the structure of the chorus and the song, in general, was really jarring; without a set rhyme scheme or meter it was hard to get a feel for the song. 
Lyrically this was just punch after punch as well 
It was a nice run. I'm guessing it got like a 7. I can see where you're coming from, though.