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Tournament: ♦ ATRL Charm School: Semester 2 ♦ // THE WINNER IS...
Member Since: 4/21/2011
Posts: 10,659
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1st Class: ANCIENT HISTORY
Comments from the Faculty:
 Headmaster boyoncetheo: You hit the nail on the head right here - this is the kind of entry I envisioned when Ammer and I originally thought up this challenge back in Semester 1. Thoughtful, introspective, and genuine. What I really love about your entry, and what takes it that extra step, is that instead of just saying "I was horrible to you, I'm sorry for that", you actually do some analysis of WHY you acted that way. I'm proud of you - way to deliver with this entry!
NICKIMINAJ: Your apology is fine, I guess. It wasn't a bad one, but didn't stand out as great, either. A bit textbook. The formatting seemed a little much, and I'm not sure it was needed. If a specific challenge calls for slick formatting, by all means go for it, but this was the kind of challenge that required to to focus for on content than on presentation.
TheSeenScene: I can tell that you put a lot of thought and effort into crafting your apology. Rather than just a simple back and forth of "I'm sorry" and "That's ok", I felt like you and Anna were really having a valuable dialogue here. I know this was done for the challenge, but I sincerely hope it continues. Seems like you two have a lot to work through, but I'd say you're off to a solid start. Thank you for taking this challenge so seriously.
Igrt: Really? You're gonna be the one to pull the whole "I'm only doing this for a game!" thing? When I posted the link to last Semester, I certainly didn't expect anyone to read the entire thing...but all you had to do was check the comments for this exact same challenge from last time where the very first judging comment given was me telling someone how lame it was that they openly stated they were only doing this for a game. Yeah, it was required for the game, but if you look beyond that it's a chance to actually grow and improve. If you're not here for that, you're missing the point.
ririfan21: I was quite excited to see your entry, given that the persona you project around ATRL is more of the "unapologetic" type, and I will say that you did better than I expected here. I kind of wish you apologized for something bigger than just a Game related disagreement, but the fact that you of all people managed to get through an apology without being shady earns you points from me.
Su-Barbie-A: I know you struggled a bit given that you don't have much to apologize for, but huge kudos to you for thinking of something rather than just giving up and not submitting. I think your entry could have been a bit stronger if you linked to the actual post you're apologizing for, that way we could have seen the context. Aside from that, the apology itself is pretty good. It' short, but I don't always think that's a bad thing.
CrazyCat: Sure, your formatting looks great, I won't deny that. But still, I can think of at least three times (if not more) in the thread where I specifically said this was the kind of challenge where more thought should be put into the content of your entry rather than what it looks like. Trust us, if and when we get to a challenge where formatting is important, we'll let you know. Charm School is about having authentic and meaningful growth and improvement, and that can happen without special fonts and graphics. As for the content, it was actually a pretty good apology. I just think it would have seemed more sincere without going overboard on the appearance of it.
AdamAL4: I really want to give you the benefit of the doubt that this is genuine and sincere, but with lines like "it pains me everyday to know how much I hurt you", the entire thing just seems a little...much? If it truly affected you that much, surely you would have apologized to Kitt before just being required to do it for a game, no? Like I said to Su-Barbie-A, this entry would have been much stronger if you linked to the actual post you're talking about. People who weren't involved may have no idea what happened, and therefore your entry is one of the less memorable ones to those who can't see it in any context. Without that, it just becomes another apology.
Nasiir15: Not the worst, not the best. I'd like to see more effort from you in the coming challenges. I see potential in you, but it will take a little more time and effort put into your submissions. I do like that you posted it in the Base rather than doing a PM. There's something to be said for an apology that's done in public. I think it shows you're really sorry. And given that you're the only one who apologized in a thread post, it helps your entry stand out.
!Blue!: Seems like you said some pretty hurtful things to Spyro, and I'm glad you included them in your actual message so that those of us who aren't familiar with what happened are able to understand it more. I think you put effort into the actual apology itself, but I think you could have put maybe a bit more effort into editing it before sending. Stuff like proper spelling just help to make your posts that much more polished and put together, which of course, is one of the Charm School goals.
JadGhamloush96: This would have been infinitely times stronger if you had actually sent it to jinzo himself instead of just me. You submitted it a mere minutes after I posted the challenge details, so that leads me to believe it was more of an instinct thing rather than a thoughtful one. You could have put some more time and effort into it and I think you could have benefited from thinking it through before rushing to submit.
Dean pika
theoyella jukebox: Fantastic entry. It was a bit long and I feel like you could've gotten the same message across with lessor words, but I still enjoyed it. You were sincere, honest and truthful and that's what matters most. I'm not going to be judging on formatting this challenge for anyone, but keep in mind that I will for future reference. Overall, great job Theo. 
NICKIMINAJ:  I didn't like it, but I didn't dislike it. I feel like you focused more on making your entry look nice instead of the actual apology towards Barbie. Like ethan said in the thread, you've only been here for a few months so there's not much you would need to apologize for right now. But even with that said, this still came off as half-assed. Try to put in a little more energy into the future challenges and I'm sure you'll go far.
TheSeenScene: I liked this entry a lot. It came off a bit forced at first for reasons I can't explain, but halfway through it I was convinced you were being honest and loved it. Anna's reply  But it's nice to see that you guys made up. I really don't have anything negative to say about this entry, good job.
ririfan21: I liked the apology, but I wasn't crazy about it. That was really all you had to get off your chest? I've seen you around the forum and have read more offensive things than a simple overreaction in a game that could've been addressed. Also, your wording is really awkward and you forget some important words in some sentences. You should double check for spelling and grammar before you submit entries in the future.
Su-Barbie-A: This was adorable. Short, sweet and to the point. Some people don't realize that you can get the same point across in less words, so I commend you for realizing that. However, your tone came off a bit fake. For some random reason it seemed like you'd just go back to shading P!nk after you finished writing the apology. I don't know, maybe it's that damn alexz3 smiley. Anyways, I liked the entry.
CrazyCat: That font size.  Never use that again. The formatting is gorgeous and easily the best of every entry. However, this was such a long read. And unlike Theo's, it wasn't a good long. I had to leave and come back like 3 times. Maybe the font size made it seem longer than it was. I don't know, but anyways enough of that. You sounded sincere and I think overall this is an 'okay' entry. I wasn't impressed as much as I thought I would be at first glance. But just work on your wording (and font size) and I'm sure you'll do well in the future challenges.
AdamAL4: This sounds so............fake. "It pains me every day to know how much I hurt you." Really?  It sure doesn't seem like it. I like you Adam, but this was just messy. It felt like you were writing words just to write them. I didn't see much of an apology, I just saw "I need to get this over with so let me jot something down".
!Blue!: I can't see your first screen shot so... But anyways, this was alright. It didn't stand out from the others but it wasn't bad either. Your point about "we can be friends as long as you don't overdo it with your posts: D" threw me off since you're basically putting blame on them when it's supposed to be you apologizing. I get you were playing around, but it felt unnecessary. You also jumped from point to point with each new sentence which made everything feel jumbled. The entry had potential, but the lack of details and fluent thought process made it underwhelming.
JadGhamloush96: I'm not crazy about this entry. I want to like it and everything required is there, but something is missing. I think it's because you didn't send this to jinzo himself. I feel like you were sincere, but why didn't you send it to him if you were truly sorry? He's an active member and I'm sure he would've read it. In hindsight that isn't a big deal, but it felt like you were talking to a wall the entire time. I can't say you need to improve on something like that for future challenges since it'll never happen again, but try to focus on the challenges more and what the judges are looking for if that makes sense.
Igrt:  Did you even take this seriously? I cringed the entire time and I can already tell no energy was put forth whatsoever. Your apology to Clark was the only redeeming quality and yet that was tarnished with the "even if it contains true tea, (Sorry I HAD to)" comment. Your comment about "I have to do it for Charm School. And I'm a gaga Stan BTW," shows that you're not willing to change and only entered Charm School since it was ~another game to play~. I'm extremely unimpressed with this entry, and if you make it to further challenges I hope you try to put forth more than 5% of effort.
Nasiir15: Eh, it was alright. Definitely one of the weaker entries this challenge. You suffer the same penalty as many others have which is showing a lack of effort. While I understand that you mostly remain in the Nicki Minaj base/talk to Barbz, it just feels you could've done more or gone the extra mile with this. It wasn't terrible, but just try to show that you want to win this game instead of floating by.
Dean Katie
NICKIMINAJ: Well...short and sweet. You haven't been here all that long so perhaps you just haven't had time to make some enemies yet. Not sure if that's supposed to be a bad thing. It was a little too simple and could have been more from the heart.
Su-Barbie-A: Just a heads up: don't use such small fonts, especially when italicized. I didn't dock any points but keep that in mind. Movin on, I like how you admit you haven't really had any fights. This is a game for irrelevants as well as hot messes. Your apology was unclear because I don't know to whom it was delivered or the topic. I think you made fun of someone for turning on Gaga after the BTW backlash?
CrazyCat: Okay, my glasses are 2.25 so let's not use size negative three font. Your apology seemed to work, but it was really lost in the formatting. You should have let your words do the talking.
Blue: Maybe it's just me but I don't think restating offensive things in an apology is a good move. It's better to speak vaguely about "the things I said" than to restate them clearly. It's nice that you acknowledge it was an unnecessary feud.
ririfan: Like Igrt, I'm still unclear about some of the aspects of your apology. It seemed very short, rehearsed, and fake.
Jad: Maybe I'm reading this incorrectly but it looks like you just typed this to boyonce instead of jinzo. If so, that kind of defeats the point. Besides, your apology seemed like an attempt to reopen old wounds instead of closing them.
Igrt: It said nothing about what the problem was and your apology was kind of wrapped in an insult. And I'm not saying you need to rewrite Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire but that was a bit of a short entry.
theo: Did your closing paragraph imply that you're slowly coming out in real life? If so, that's amazing! It's so tragic that some people still feel a need to hide themselves and even sadder to do so on an online forum. We should be able to be whoever the hell we want with the anonymous cloak of the internet. Anyway, your apology seemed honest and heartfelt. It didn't seem like you just had to fulfill a game requirement.
Scene: Props for taking the blame for the "fight." You got one hell of a response from Anna which reflects well on yourself. I really like how you (and others) didn't say "this is a project for Charm School." I don't know, that just makes it seem fake to me, so good job.
Adam: I had no idea there was a feud between Adam and Kitt. Maybe I should get some stronger glasses. I'm not sure what the fight was about but it looks like you two worked out your differences in this thread. Take that as a sign that it worked.
Nasiir: It was nice that you did it in the Base thread in which the problems took place. Nicki her base is a hot ass mess so don't worry about anything that happens there.
Take a look through all the comments. You can learn and grow from each one. Results will be up shortly.
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Member Since: 9/15/2012
Posts: 22,487
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Lemme just...
Quote:
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I really want to give you the benefit of the doubt that this is genuine and sincere, but with lines like "it pains me everyday to know how much I hurt you", the entire thing just seems a little...much? If it truly affected you that much, surely you would have apologized to Kitt before just being required to do it for a game, no? Like I said to Su-Barbie-A, this entry would have been much stronger if you linked to the actual post you're talking about. People who weren't involved may have no idea what happened, and therefore your entry is one of the less memorable ones to those who can't see it in any context. Without that, it just becomes another apology.
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Okay, honestly? I sent an apology WEEKS ago but Kitt didn't get it since I was on ignore, as I said multiple times in the thread. Also, link to the post? The thread. that. it's. from. is. deleted.
I'm sorrry to all judges and Kitt if it sounded fake because I meant every single word and if you don't believe me then honestly too bad for you.
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/31/2012
Posts: 12,510
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OMG 
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Member Since: 12/26/2011
Posts: 14,707
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Quote:
Originally posted by AdamAL4
Lemme just...
Okay, honestly? I sent an apology WEEKS ago but Kitt didn't get it since I was on ignore, as I said multiple times in the thread. Also, link to the post? The thread. that. it's. from. is. deleted.
I'm sorrry to all judges and Kitt if it sounded fake because I meant every single word and if you don't believe me then honestly too bad for you. |
Mess.
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Member Since: 4/21/2011
Posts: 10,659
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Quote:
Originally posted by AdamAL4
Lemme just...
Okay, honestly? I sent an apology WEEKS ago but Kitt didn't get it since I was on ignore, as I said multiple times in the thread. Also, link to the post? The thread. that. it's. from. is. deleted.
I'm sorrry to all judges and Kitt if it sounded fake because I meant every single word and if you don't believe me then honestly too bad for you. |
Well, apologies for missing the bit about you sending an apology earlier but Kitt having you on ignore. If you thought that was important to your entry, you probably should have included it in your submission to the judges. We can't be expected to catch every single thing that's said in casual conversation in this thread. And as for the thread being deleted, how exactly was I supposed to know that? Please elaborate.
Too bad for me? Is that really the attitude you want to be known for in this competition?
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Member Since: 12/26/2011
Posts: 14,707
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Katie and I having nearly the exact same opinions. 
EDIT: Actually we all had similar opinions.
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/31/2012
Posts: 12,510
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Yes Katie  I am coming out slowly in real life. I'm also learning more and more about myself and who I want to be everyday.
Thank you judges for your comments.
EDIT: OMG I hope Ammer is okay.  Car crashes are the pits.
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Member Since: 3/27/2012
Posts: 27,951
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In Adam's defense, it really did hurt him that Kitt had him on ignore for awhile, and he did actually send that weeks ago. Although, I think he really should stay longer
If more then anything, from a spectators perspective, he needs to work on his short fuse.
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Banned
Member Since: 3/3/2012
Posts: 13,073
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Not  playing against me
For some reason I thought you guys already knew who I was talking about because I mentioned him in my application, my bad 
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ATRL Moderator
Member Since: 11/1/2010
Posts: 26,750
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Quote:
Originally posted by pika
Katie and I having nearly the exact same opinions.
EDIT: Actually we all had similar opinions. |
This round was pretty clear all across.
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Originally posted by theoyella jukebox
Yes Katie I am coming out slowly in real life. I'm also learning more and more about myself and who I want to be everyday.
Thank you judges for your comments. |
Congrats!
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Originally posted by ririfan21
I rather have the ACTUAL thing, than these clueless hints.
The hints are giving me a headache
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These hints are the best thing to take place in between rounds.
Quote:
Originally posted by Kitt
You better not change it to no damn pikachu  you're name is perfect.
*Your |
That was what I was talking about. Dat homophonic heterograph fail. I've just never seen you make a typo, like, ever.
Of course, pika should never change.
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Member Since: 2/29/2012
Posts: 17,071
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Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
That was what I was talking about. Dat homophonic heterograph fail. I've just never seen you make a typo, like, ever.
Of course, pika should never change.
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ATRL Moderator
Member Since: 11/1/2010
Posts: 26,750
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Let me use my degree for something. GOSH.
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Member Since: 9/15/2012
Posts: 22,487
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Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
These hints are the best thing to take place in between rounds.
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Thisssssssssss.
Even though I can never figure them out I always get life.
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ATRL Moderator
Member Since: 11/1/2010
Posts: 26,750
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I mean, what else is there to do?
Speaking of, where are the results?
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ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 6/15/2007
Posts: 29,795
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Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
I mean, what else is there to do?
Speaking of, where are the results? |
We can take them all down memory lane of how we met, our engagement, and wedding. That's always a good and fun read.
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Member Since: 3/27/2012
Posts: 27,951
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Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
We can take them all down memory lane of how we met, our engagement, and wedding. That's always a good and fun read.
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Story time, let me take a sit.
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Member Since: 2/29/2012
Posts: 17,071
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Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
We can take them all down memory lane of how we met, our engagement, and wedding. That's always a good and fun read.
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Not this again.
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Member Since: 3/22/2012
Posts: 40,939
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Yayyy i did alright  but i'll definitely show more effort in the upcoming challenges 
I hope Ammer is going to be Ok. 
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Member Since: 4/21/2011
Posts: 10,659
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1st Class: ANCIENT HISTORY
Results:
Charm School students, thank you all for submitting your first assignment - ANCIENT HISTORY. In this assignment you were asked to look back at your own history here on ATRL and make an apology for your past behaviour. This apology is a sign of your willingness to move forward from your messiness, and the first step in becoming a classier, more put together poster. The Faculty has each submitted a list, ranking your entries from best to worst, and those were averaged together for this final standing. The first name called is the winner who scored highest with the faculty. Names will be called in descending order, with the final two names being the lowest scorers in the rankings. From there, one will be expelled from Charm School. Let's begin.
The winner of this challenge is...
theoyella jukebox!!!
Congrats to you! Your apology was heartfelt, and really showed how wiling you are to examine, analyze, and better yourself as a poster, Keep it up!
As for the rest of you....
2. TheSeenScene
Great job this week. All judges were impressed.
3. Su-Barbie-A
4. CrazyCat
5. Nasiir15
6, 7, 8 (a tie!): NICKIMINAJ, !Blue!, ririfan21
9. AdamAL4
Meaning our bottom two are Jad and Igrt. You both scored lowest with the faculty and could have done a lot better on your apologies. But who scored higher???
10. JadGhamloush96
11. Igrt
However, due to Killer Queen and Marooner5 not submitting, NOBODY will be expelled this week, and you both remain enrolled in Charm School. You lucked out, to be honest. We expect more from you both next time!
Your next assignment will be up tomorrow.
Keep it classy.
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Member Since: 8/16/2012
Posts: 14,988
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I promise from now on, no more "formatting"! 4 is very good!!
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