Yes, Christina Aguilera wants to be Madonna and Lady Gaga, but that’s not why her new video is so terrible
I’m prepared to take my lumps for saying this, so bring on those angry comments: Christina Aguilera is officially and completely passé. (At least she is until Burlesque comes out on November 24 and, hopefully, makes both Aguilera and her costar, Cher, fierce ruling divas again.)
This week on Billboard’s Hot 100, “Not Myself Tonight,” her would-be comeback single, plummets from No. 23, where it debuted last week, to No. 49, seriously jeopardizing the hit potential of her upcoming new album, Bionic. The song’s fortunes may reverse for at least one week, thanks to the publicity from its new video, which just hit the web, but don’t expect any rebound to last long.
Unfortunately for Aguilera, the video is getting more attention for whom she’s imitating, than for visual merit. But unoriginality is hardly the clip’s worst offense.
It’s not that she’s trying to be Madonna.
It’s not that she’s cribbing from Lady Gaga, going so far as to do that claw thing that Gaga does so annoyingly.
It’s not that she kisses a girl (speaking of passé).
It’s not that she crawls around on all fours like a dominatrix in heat. (How “Express Yourself”!)
It’s not that she gets down and dirrty with a hot and sweaty shirtless guy. (Who doesn’t?)
It’s not the cheap production quality.
Why is the video so bad?
Because the song itself just isn’t any good. It’s a bunch of party cliches on top of a generic techno track desperately seeking a memorable melody. If Aguilera had returned with an excellent song, she wouldn’t have had to strain so hard to get people to stop, look and listen. Of course, her voice still can knock anything out of the park, but next time, someone needs to give her something worth singing.
