Masterbation question? please help!?
Ok you guys just listen what I have to say. I am really really confused ok so a while ago I was masturbating with an egg and I was just about to organism when all the sudden my *** just liked sucked it up. It was like a vacuum and not just a regular vacuum it was like a hoover or a dyson. You know, the ones where the guy talks about the vacuum never losing suction? Yeah, my *** is a dyson.
Anyway, I was so scared and spent the rest of the night trying to queef out that egg but it wouldn't come out.
So the other day I was playing basketball in gym and the egg fell out! Into my gitch! I was too afraid to take it out and people probably thought I was growing a **** or something. So I didn't take it out of my underwear until I got home and the ***** was hardboiled! My vagina is a vacuum and a pot of boiling water. It hardboiled an egg! Im not done! So I put it in the fridge because I didn't know what else to do. A couple of hours later, my dad was eating an egg salad sandwich!
Should I tell him?
7 months ago
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Abbey Davis
Best Answer - Chosen by Voters
its ok its natural
just use lube
try new ways
dont use egg could crack=cut=infection : /
put towell down on bed
get some toilet paper
lube up vigina and bit on hands
strip tease in mirror down to your sexist thong knicker gtring w/e and bra
lay on bed
rube around play with you nipples so take bra off
then with a cleane not shape long nail and its lubed up insert your finger at start slowly then speed up but be gentle
or
get 3/4 pillows
put towels on them and get some toilet paper
srip down again bra thong etc
lube up
ride pillows like a **** star circular motios, up and down side to side w/e be fleible
the clean up
put towells in wash along with thong, they all should be wet from the lube and maybe your ***
get tissue/ toilet paper go to the toilet wipe your self and clean your self wash hands
also try in shower use body wash as lube lay down get the shower head hold your legs wide open use ur fingers a bit, orgasim will come in seconds and it cleans you to :L
in bath to hold leg wide open under the tap make sure its not to hot and just wait orgasim will come
ive done it all before its ace and DON'T TELL YOUR DAD :L
happy orgasim
let me no how you get on
any more questions just inbox me
xxxxxxx
7 months ago
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