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Discussion: "Promiscuous gays give our community a bad name!"
Banned
Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 4,870
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Quote:
Originally posted by Daddy
Yeah, It's also nothing to be ashamed of or a reason for people to pretend they're above others.
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Nobody here is saying they're above others. Just that the large percentage of this community that are promiscuous make a bad name for the community at large, and make it seem like all gay people crave is sex, not a serious committed relationship. Which then makes it harder for most people to agree with gay people adopting children, because kids need stability, not a new man in their life every week.
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Member Since: 11/25/2008
Posts: 6,349
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That is something common for all men and not only for gay men. It's just easier when both are guys
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Member Since: 8/17/2013
Posts: 3,945
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I was promiscuous before Grindr or A4A was created. It's called being handsome, charming, and knowing how to dance.
Now I'm not promiscuous because I see celibacy as a turn-on in other guys...so I think they find it a turn-on in me. I have so much sexual energy and romantic energy oozing out of me!
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Member Since: 1/1/2013
Posts: 19,579
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Quote:
Originally posted by Humunukuapua
Promiscuity is nothing to be proud of.
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Neither is being in a monogamous relationship. There's no pride in either, but neither are wrong. They're people's private life and others should not judge.
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Member Since: 3/27/2012
Posts: 18,963
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Quote:
Originally posted by Humunukuapua
Nobody here is saying they're above others. Just that the large percentage of this community that are promiscuous make a bad name for the community at large, and make it seem like we all gay people crave is sex.
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How is that a bad name?
Sex is amazing. Most people would admit that.
We need to get past the idea that sex is something shameful.
The promiscuous gays are not giving a bad name, they are strong and confident and not concerned with what other people think of them and don't allow their worth to be compromised by something as silly as who you've slept with.
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Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 659
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Only dumb and homophobic (internalized for the self hating kind) people think one gay person represents an entire community. That person represents themselves. Plus, nothing wrong with being promiscuous as long as you use protection and have fun with consenting adults. Doing the most.
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Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 4,353
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Quote:
Originally posted by swissman
You can be promiscuous without hooking up with strangers or being on Grindr...
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Where did I say you can't? Jesus, did you even try to understand what I was trying to say?
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Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 725
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Quote:
Originally posted by Doogle
Neither is being in a monogamous relationship. There's no pride in either, but neither are wrong. They're people's private life and others should not judge.
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self brainwashing at its best
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 14,461
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welp, they just dragged the **** out of me
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Member Since: 4/4/2014
Posts: 8,883
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Quote:
Originally posted by CBXC
Y'all don't know how to read. He never said that straight people aren't promiscuous?
He just said that a lot of people perceive the gay community as more promiscuous than the straight community, which, like it or not, is generally the case. I don't think he was trying to **** shame anyone, since he seems mostly to be speaking about people who are in relationships solely to get a nut off (which in his experience, has led to cheating and a lot of emotional pain).
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You seem to be able to read properly, but not look at the bigger picture of what he's saying.
He's shaming gay men who like to have sex with different people on a regular basis, saying that it gives the whole gay community a bad name. No matter if it's true or not, at the end of the day, not every gay male behaves like that, so picking out sexual traits that are common to every sexual orientation to try and shame gay men is just plain homophobic. There's nothing wrong with being promiscuous if you're taking care of yourself and not putting your sexual partner's life in danger. How many times have you heard someone say, "Mary and Joe are so promiscuous, they give the straight community such a bad name"?
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Member Since: 4/4/2014
Posts: 8,883
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Quote:
Originally posted by Musicislove
self brainwashing at its best
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You must be very young.
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Banned
Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 4,870
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Surely y'all aren't aiming to be promiscuous your whole life? I've been promiscuous in the past so I'm not one to judge so don't think I am, but would you not like to be in an actual loving relationship with someone, growing up and growing old together, rather than having only one-night stands?
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Member Since: 3/27/2012
Posts: 18,963
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dekkan
Where did I say you can't? Jesus, did you even try to understand what I was trying to say?
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Well I bolded it for you but let me quote it. You said, “hooking up, having sex with strangers or looking for sex on apps like Grindr disgusts me” … and the conversation here is about promiscuity. So I said that you can be promiscuous and do things that don’t discuss you like you mentioned.
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Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 3,421
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Quote:
Originally posted by leociccone
I was promiscuous before Grindr or A4A was created. It's called being handsome, charming, and knowing how to dance.
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Tea
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Banned
Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 4,870
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Quote:
Originally posted by JessLM
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Or maybe they just happen to have their own set opinion like you?
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Member Since: 3/27/2012
Posts: 18,963
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Quote:
Originally posted by *-ChriZ-*
I don't get what you mean by that? xD
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If you’re saying it’s harder now for people who want monogamy to find relationships because more people want to be open, then if it’s easy for people who want monogamy to find relationships because more people want that, then it will be harder for people who want open relationships to find them because it will not be very popular.
Either way, one group finds it hard. But I think really it’s way easier to find monogamy anyway. It’s just that like all change, just a little seems outrageous.
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Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 3,421
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Quote:
Originally posted by JessLM
You must be very unattractive/fat.
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Member Since: 4/4/2014
Posts: 8,883
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Quote:
Originally posted by Humunukuapua
Surely y'all aren't aiming to be promiscuous your whole life? I've been promiscuous in the past so I'm not one to judge so don't think I am, but would you not like to be in an actual loving relationship with someone, growing up and growing old together, rather than having only one-night stands?
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Why do you make it seem as if not wanting to settle in a relationship is wrong? Y'all are so judgmental omg.
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Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 659
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Quote:
Originally posted by JessLM
You seem to be able to read properly, but not look at the bigger picture of what he's saying.
He's shaming gay men who like to have sex with different people on a regular basis, saying that it gives the whole gay community a bad name. No matter if it's true or not, at the end of the day, not every gay male behaves like that, so picking out sexual traits that are common to every sexual orientation to try and shame gay men is just plain homophobic. There's nothing wrong with being promiscuous if you're taking care of yourself and not putting your sexual partner's life in danger. How many times have you heard someone say, "Mary and Joe are so promiscuous, they give the straight community such a bad name"?
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YOU get it, clock the homophobes
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Member Since: 12/27/2011
Posts: 20,704
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I agree and disagree.
The gay male community can be hypersexualized but it's not fair to solely target them when straight people can be just as promiscuous. Gay promiscuity is more visible because straight people have used it as a means to demean gay men.
Also, there is absolutely nothing wrong with having open relationships if both parties consent to it. Someone else's relationship and how it works is no one else's business.
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