Banned
Member Since: 6/9/2011
Posts: 17,950
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Quote:
Originally posted by Delilah.
The fact that some of these fanfics read exactly like today's current situation  |
IKR. 
Quote:
Originally posted by Nicole
Beyonce sits in her palatial dressing room, examining herself in her vanity mirror and preparing for her morning routine. Breakfast? Exercise? Dance training? Vocal runs? No. First order of business every morning is acting.
She composes herself, takes a moment, then WHIRLS around in her chair, a look of horror on her face.
"No, I found her like this!" she exclaims. "She must have tripped down the stairs! Her neck…it looks broken. No, she's not breathing! Send someone right away!"
Her acting coach who's been in the room all along steps forward. "Much better. I really believed it this time. After 4 years you've finally gotten it down."
Suddenly the door flies open and Blue bursts into the room, playing with her Princess Elsa doll (mommy said the Princess Tiana doll was way too dark). Beyonce glares at her. "What did I tell you about interrupting my morning routine?!"
"Sorry mommy."
Beyonce grabs her arm and twists it. "When the police officers show up, what will you say?"
"Auntie Rihanna fell down the marble staircase! It was an accident." (her performance is more convincing than Beyonce's.)
Beyonce softens. "Good girl. You may have your father's face but you have my wits."
The acting coach paces the room. "If only you could cry. Then they'd never suspect foul play. Try thinking of a deeply emotional experience. Like your relationship with your father coming to an end. Or your miscarriage."
Beyonce rolls her eyes at him. Like she cares. That's not gonna do it.
"Well then I'm afraid I have no other choice," says the acting coach. "Think about your Hot 100 performance this decade."
Beyonce's eyes immediately moisten.
The acting coach goes for the kill: "And think about how your songs have performed outside the US."
Beyonce's hand flies to her mouth. Hot tears pour down her face now. Her body is wracked with violent sobs.
"Finally, you're ready!" the acting coach declares.
Beyonce picks up the phone and dials. "Rihanna, Blue's been asking for you all morning. She misses her Auntie. Could you come over please?" And with a sly, evil grin, she hangs up and begins her other morning ritual -- applying copious amounts of white foundation to her face.
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