[Truth Teller]

Originally posted by ClarksonSlays

You won't be here to see your first No. 1

Is this weeks elimination closer than last week's?

You'll find out soon

[minho]

Happy birthday pears!

[Truth Teller]

A Devil Always Wins (Sam)

I really wish you didn’t say “pride”, the subtlety of “father of all sins” and the like was nicer and reading “pride” multiple times kept reminding me that this was a song for Platinum Hit. Really cool and original idea and executed well. Nice language and great metaphors. I don’t get why the war’s lost because I don’t really see what was lost from the protagonist’s point of view.

Breathless (EuphorianSea)

Hate to be annoying about rhyme scheme at this point the but one in the chorus (AABBCD ABCCDE) is really off-putting. Some of the rhymes feel very forced to be ex. the tough line. “You let rip” makes your song sound like a fart joke. A lot of really cool ideas though! I wish you had more to the song than “I’m angry”; I know that was your assignment but you could’ve had another component to the song, like for example an explanation of why or saying some literal things that happened

Chasing Dreams (Hugamari)

Really really really liked the “if you” anaphora followed by something to do with destructiveness; really summarizes greed well plus it sounds really cool. The “whatever the word” part is weird because a) they know the word “avarice” yet they aren’t sure what greed means??? and b) grammatically it’s off-putting. The “want you dead” part was really surprising and then it never got mentioned again which was kind of strange. Overall though you really embodied greed very well and I thoroughly enjoyed this song.

Green-Eyed Drizella (Era)

You were working with a really overused story and I feel like you didn’t add much new to it or view it in any new ways. You also made everything really simple and obvious, which sometimes works but didn’t benefit this song. In addition, while everything doesn’t have to have perfect grammar, a) it should make sense and b) you should avoid inverted sentence structures, like (not from a PH song) “to be sad I will not”.

Oh, Why? (keshasparsxo)

The introduction of “alcohol” was really awkward partly because you just straight-out said it, because it was followed by “oh why why why” which is a little comical and how it finished the sentence of the last line when normally there are pauses between lines. The way everything was phrased really sounded comically melodramatic even though it’s serious song, I felt like it was the lyrical version of a soap opera. There was also a lot of forced rhyming; rhymes should feel naturally occurring, never use a trite phrase or an awkwardly phrased line just to please a rhyme scheme.

Purpose (ClarksonSlays)

I don’t normally pay attention to whether or not people fulfilled the challenge but this didn’t really feel lust-y at all. Lust has sexual connotations whereas this didn’t really seem to reference sex much at all in about half of the song. It really stood out because sex isn’t referenced at all seemingly in the chorus which stands out the most. Make sure everything in your song is useful and isn’t just there for a rhyme (ex. “dream in the night”... I mean you COULD be dreaming in the day but it is a little redundant).

We Were Friends Until Yesterday (8thPrince)

Very hooky last three lines of the chorus, and Ilike the concept for the song. Don’t really see the envy though; the song is completely focused around heartache, the song doesn’t speak of any jealousy outside of the one time where you just say “envy”. I mean you want him to suffer but it’s not envy. Watch the phrasing of some lines, like “I hope it's not easy, I hope it really hurts / I hope you never recover or pick yourself out the dirt”.

Woman Of Desire (lovesong)

The way you introduced the jealousy and even used the word “envy” just screamed at me “LOOK! This is ENVY! See????” I could’ve used a little more subtlety, we still would have gotten it. I like how it had a storyline to it but also wasn’t like “this happened, then this happened, etc.”. Some of the rhyming was forced (“like a caress”, “I can deter”) because it either felt unnecessary or didn’t fully explain itself.

[minho]

I was wondering if the judges wouldn't like the line I had with the word "envy"

I thought that at first my song was too subtle so I needed something to make it seem more obvious.

[Temporal]

I'm gonna be a little bold and say I disagree with my song not fulfilling lust? My definition of lust that I was given said lust was "often synonymous with sexual desire," not indicative of it. The first sentence of the definition and the most defining was "The intense craving or eagerness," which I think was shown in the song. This isn't me saying "Tymps you suck!1!!" but rather just trying to get my point across while allowing you to discuss it further if you'd like.

. Make sure everything in your song is useful and isn’t just there for a rhyme

There will be one song where I don't get this comment from you, just one

[Hugamari]

It must've been a common agreement that my bridge was the weakest part. I didn't think my song was good when I sent though, so I didn't think a better bridge would've helped.

[UFO]

Interesting

[Tymps.]

Originally posted by ClarksonSlays

I'm gonna be a little bold and say I disagree with my song not fulfilling lust? My definition of lust that I was given said lust was "often synonymous with sexual desire," not indicative of it. The first sentence of the definition and the most defining was "The intense craving or eagerness," which I think was shown in the song. This isn't me saying "Tymps you suck!1!!" but rather just trying to get my point across while allowing you to discuss it further if you'd like.



There will be one song where I don't get this comment from you, just one

By "often synonymou" it really means "basically always". I mean, when was the last time you heard the word luster used and it had nothing to do with carnality?

[Truth Teller]

Results begin in 20 minutes.

The difference between #2 and #5 is less than 0.05

The difference between #6 and #7 is even smaller

[UFO]

Originally posted by Truth Teller

Results begin in 20 minutes.

The difference between #2 and #5 is less than 0.05

The difference between #6 and #7 is even smaller

Okay, we get it now

[Hugamari]

Only 20 minutes, exciting!

[conatus]

Good luck to everyone.

[Tymps.]

Mess, let me start using the full 1 to 10 spectrum next round.

[Hugamari]

Anyway, congratulations to 8th for getting ha first #1!

[Stark]

[Temporal]

Originally posted by Truth Teller

Results begin in 20 minutes.

The difference between #2 and #5 is less than 0.05

The difference between #6 and #7 is even smaller

Bye

[Temporal]

Originally posted by Tymps.

By "often synonymou" it really means "basically always". I mean, when was the last time you heard the word luster used and it had nothing to do with carnality?

Just because I didn't pull a Dark Side doesn't mean the lust wasn't there, the craving was there, it's just that the actual sexual desire was put in undertones like "I just need to touch you." I didn't want to put my dick in the judges faces again But I get what you're saying of course.

[Truth Teller]

Originally posted by Tymps.

Mess, let me start using the full 1 to 10 spectrum next round.

The next round is not the time for that, trust me

[Hugamari]

Originally posted by Truth Teller

The next round is not the time for that, trust me

Look, I STRUGGLED to inch by this round you can't do this to me with Matty coming after me.

[Tymps.]

Originally posted by Truth Teller

The next round is not the time for that, trust me

Truth Teller always holding secrets, the true enigma popstar