OK, the video is done. I am absolutely lost at why Hugamari and Scene's names aren't appearing properly. It shows well on my screen. I'll keep working on it, but here it is!
OK, the video is done. I am absolutely lost at why Hugamari and Scene's names aren't appearing properly. It shows well on my screen. I'll keep working on it, but here it is!
ATRL's Next TOP MEMBER Cycle 8 | EP1: Judges Comments 1!
ATRL's Next topmember Cycle 8
EPISODE 1: USERNAMES
Replacement Judge: Deuces. for orange
THE COMMENTS
MR. LOCO
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
I'm all for short entries, but this leaves a lot lacking. It's forgettable. I don't want a gimmick or an overdone essay, but I do want substance. I learn two things from this entry: you're proud of your Latin heritage and you think you're crazy. Two things I could have guessed from just looking at your username. You need something extra, and this entry isn't enough to make me interested in you.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
Quick and straight to the point. Nice. A bit more creativity and originality in the post would have been appreciated. Try to make yourself stand out a bit more. If your post wasn't first, you could have been easily skipped over while scrolling down.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
you probably didn't know what the competition would be like, so you kept it simple and short. That's not a bad thing exactly, but more depth and pizzazz could always help! If you stay, try making more of a statement, rather than just answering the question.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
As I've said in the past, sometimes, your entry can be short, yet still be enlightening. In your case, there really wasn't much that you had to do, because there's not that much to your name. I like how you used Loco as a means of honoring your Mexican origin, I really like that. The only thing that I am wondering is HOW crazy can you get? I'm sure you can get crazy, but elaboration on how crazy can you get would have been nice.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
Short, sweet, and to the point. However, I felt it was a little too short. I wanted to know more about you with your username.
HUGAMARI
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
Cute. I like that you tied it back to your personality so I learned something about you as a user. The video is superfluous, but it was a nice touch and it made you stand out. I appreciate the creativity behind that.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
Very interesting that you choose to create an audio to compliment, the video. That is rarely seen. Great job.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
colorful, entertaining, and a lot of energy went in! I like what I see. Something to look out for next time could be adding a little more text, instead of relying on visual props to help.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
The video was definitely something different. I'm sure that Evun will get flashbacks to his own creative entries. One big flaw in the video is that your voice isn't all that clear. I can understand what you're saying, but I had to strain a bit to hear what you were saying. Granted, I also don't have the best hearing. I also liked that you basically included the contents of the video below, for those of us who didn't want to watch the video but get the gist of what you were saying. It's always nice to ensure that you're not just letting the video do the talking.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
A very nice entry. We got the gist of how you’re username came about and how it represents you. The video though, in my opinion, was not needed. You were basically giving me the same entry twice, but one was being read to us over a beat you produced.
ENERGY
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
Were you high when you wrote this? A bit messy, but in a charming way. Fantastic pictures. I wish you had tied this back to you as a user more (what's your personal energy?), but I like the theme and ATRL connection a lot nonetheless.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
I really enjoyed your explanation and how figurative you got with the word "energy". I really like your entry.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
something tells me your entire story was pure BS, but it doesn't matter. Sounds good, comes off entertaining, and a fun read. I would advise you to make it more text based from now on, though.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
I felt like I was in a science class, listening to my teacher talk about energy...and somehow making a comparison to pop music in the process. It would have been extremely random in the class. Here, it makes sense, and I liked this entry. The one thing I will mention is that, in the future, refrain from using so many pictures in your entries. You can use a pic if you want, to emphasize your point, but using three pictures kind of messes with the flow of your entry, especially when they are placed between the entry.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
A very nice entry. Gives a mixture of how it pertains to you, others, and ATRL. That second picture though… the one with the crowd… it creeps me out for some reason. Especially that kid on the left in the front. He’s giving me future pedophile energies.
TEAM ZUNE XD
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
I like the sentiments, but you need to work on being concise. This was fairly boring, and it would have been more powerful if it wasn't so drawn out. In future entries, try not to overcomplicate things -- you need to simplify.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
I honestly skimmed through it. The problem with your entry is that you have the information, but it's boring. In some settings, it's great to be filled with words and information you want to share. That's what ATRL is all about really. But you have to make it appeal. If you were going to write all that you should have added visuals or something to grab my attention.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
it was a bit of a long-winded read, to be honest. You're excellent at explaining yourself, but not in a clear and concise manner. I'd focus more on presentation from here on out, since you're obviously great with content.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
Let's just start off with one note: You don't need to thank us or hope that we'll enjoy what you have said about your username. Let the entry speak for you. Okay, with that out of the way, I really enjoyed this entry. Perhaps the usage of quotations for "Zune" was a little TOO much, honestly, but that's just the grammar queen in me talking. Other than that, I quite enjoyed this look into your personal history with the Zune brand and how it connects with you joining ATRL. Good stuff.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
First I would like to say, Apple iPod >>>>. Secondly, your entry was very insightful on how you got your username. A lot of details though I found unnecessary, which means the entry could have still had the insightful impact just with less wording. Overall nice entry and I hope you realized to bring a separate bag for your sweaty clothes
ETHAN
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
Simple and direct, but it works so well. Partially because I can relate -- I chose such a simple username because I fear growing out of a tacky one. I like that it showed your personality and had some flair without being overdone. The Nicki sig comment made me giggle inside. The entry is interesting without being gimmicky. Well done.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
Interesting explanation. It is a simple name. Decent entry.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
honest and upfront. A decent and genuinely good read. You could try working on format a little, but it's just extra at this point. Great work!
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
I don't know, I think that Katy's ***** Kat would have been a FINE username. Note the thick sarcasm. I liked this entry, primarily because you yourself noted that it would have been silly and try hard to give yourself a name like "Nicki 4 Life", because what if you don't like her a year from now? Then, unless you get ATRL+, you're stuck with that name. And you have to live with that username and tell people that you're not REALLY into Nicki...and it would just get messy. Trust me, it was a SMART decision to choose your name as your username.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
I really liked your entry. It was very simple, yet detailed and I got an insight of how your name fits you but represents you on ATRL. A lot of people don’t like when a username is someone’s real name, but I find it simple and appreciate it more. Ha, I bet Nicki is out of your signature now about the Mariah move
MUSICLOVERDUDE
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
It's nice, but it's not much beyond that. Kinda basic. I like that you discuss the evolution of your music taste and experiences. Next time, inject more personality into your entry.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
Nice explanation, plain entry but informative nevertheless.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
yours came off as a little arrogant or full of yourself. Yes, this is about you, but you don't need to be *that* into yourself. It's just an overall tone. The story itself was great though, just try a simpler delivery from now on.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
I kept thinking as I was reading this entry, "But how does your love of music connect with how you ended up with your username?" Finally, at the end of the entry, you explained it, and I'm glad, because I was ready to really not enjoy this entry up until that point. I feel like you went a little TOO much into your personal connection with music, though. I mean, mentioning that you have over 1600 songs on your iPod? Did you HAVE to mention this? Not really, no. Pointing out your personal connection to music is a good thing, but you could have left out some of the extreme particulars.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
Awe, your choir teacher sounds really nice. Honestly, seeing your posts since you have joined, I don’t see you as any other username. It was overall a nice entry.
COLLIN
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
You say you like to show individuality through presentation and not just text, but your presentation is so basic. I like the first paragraph a lot because it's interesting, but the second paragraph is such a let down. I don't get personality from this. I prefer you just being you too, but I want to know what that means. Make sure you show me more you next time around.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
Nice that you show your individuality. Nice entry.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
good and straight to the point. Like others, I would say to make it visually more creative. This is ATRL! Bring on the gifs, the slang, the messiness.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
Honestly, and I can't believe that I'm saying this...even though I like that your username IS your name, I would have preferred collynx. It would have not just been your name, but it also would have been a two-fold name, AND it would have been a unique and striking name. Your entry was...okay. Not great, just okay. It's a good enough entry, but the quality of your entry will certainly have to improve beyond this entry if you want to make it far.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
Oh geez, your past usernames for other programs. Collyleaks, sounds like a **** website. Collynx sounds like a disease. Don’t even get me started on the other one you mentioned… sounded like a myspace/make up guru YouTube account mixture. I’m glad you went with Collin, simple and it’s you. Nice entry.
ATRL's Next TOP MEMBER Cycle 8 | EP1: Judges Comments 2!
ATRL's Next topmember Cycle 8
EPISODE 1: USERNAMES
Replacement Judge: Deuces. for orange
THE COMMENTS
VJOKER
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
Cute story, it's charming that you were honest about it. Try not to end entries on a sour note though -- the "That's the of my story I think. " part makes you seem unsure of yourself.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
That gif is beyond cute. I'm melting asldjkfsa;oj. Nice explanation, cute gif.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
the honesty is appreciated and it was a nice story to read. I would try making it a little more visually appealing, though.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
I like the honesty. Really, I do. The fact of the matter is that you were in a bind, no matter what. Either you tell the truth and risk looking like someone who lacks creative skills, or you lie about your username and know deep down that what you're saying is wrong. I would have considered taking the latter option, but...I'd probably go down the route of the former, myself. I'm glad to see that you admit that you got your favorite username through copying someone else's name.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
Puppy on a swing! Okay, it was a nice entry and I appreciate your honesty. However, it seemed like you questioned yourself, your name, and your entry with “Thats the end of my story I think.” Then quickly said your last sentence to cover it up. So you used a name that you really didn’t make up yourself, own it while being real.
SLOTH
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
Awww, that video. So cute. I like your reasons. Not overly amazing, but it's good. I appreciated the small little side comments.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
The irony that you love the Canterbury tales when I just read the prologue for it two days ago for British Literature. Your fascination is cute. I like the addition of a video and quote. Pretty good.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
cute, entertaining, education, you've got it all. Your entry did its job and took us on some kind of magical journey. Keep up the great work.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
The honesty, it's so refreshing! The quote from The Canterbury Tales truly helps to get you in the right mood for the entry, so that was a fantastic design choice. I also like that you had not one, not two, but THREE different reasons as to why you use "Sloth". I quite enjoyed this entry. But trust me, NO ONE is more obsessed with sloths than Kristen Bell. The girl ****ing bawled when she was introduced to one for her birthday!
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
Sloths are ugly, I’m sorry. Your entry wasn’t ugly though. A little lengthy, but I got personality and a sense of you from it which I enjoyed. I was touched with this sentence, “This may be perceived as a negative connotation but it is part of who I am and I'm definitely not perfect.”
AMMER
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
Very solid entry. I hope you were okay with people calling you Ammer Jammer at the time. I liked they way you tied it all to the present at the end. I do hope you show more to yourself beyond your usual classy/mature theme in future entries.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
Nice to see you back in the game, Ammer. I like how you transitioned from the past to present. Different. I like it.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
cute story! It was fun to read and easy to get through. I guess you don't need a lot of help here
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
I remember your first username entry. I remember enjoying it quite a bit and remember being ashamed that your fellow classmates thought that "Ammer Jammer" was just the COOLEST nickname. What a poor reflection of the students of our schools. What I most love about THIS entry is that you went in a completely different direction than your first entry, telling the tale of how you got that nickname through the tried and true story format. A very clever entry.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
Eh yo Ammer Jammer! Trying on the shoe for size I actually liked this entry more than the one you gave last cycle. It had more character and wasn’t as precise and clean cut unlike the last one. You had more fun writing this one it seems like.
THESEENSCENE
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
I wish you had explained why you originally chose TheSeenScene for other forum, this entry left me curious for that. It's a good enough entry, but it isn't all that inspiring. I appreciate your goal of breaking out of your shell, and I hope you start to do that by showing more personality in future entries. Be adventurous!
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
I like how you brought your emotions to the post. I know how it feel to want to brake out and try new things. Good job.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
your entry was..good. Not great, not bad, just good. Try making it stand out more next time, maybe with more visuals or a bigger hook of a story.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
I like that you included a picture of a "Scene" person for the uninitiated, though, trust me, I know what a "Scene" person looks like. Honestly, though, I wasn't all that impressed with this entry. It didn't really stand out to me. It seemed kind of like a generic version of a username entry. It's something that I could have come up with in a couple minutes without even trying. I feel like you have potential, but I didn't see it this time.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
Actually when I read your username I think of the My Music Show, a YouTube series, in which there is a character named Scene. Her tagline is “I’m Scene, you see!?” So everytime I see your name, I laugh cause I think of that. As for your entry, I got not story behind your name. It’ll make you stand out cause it’s tongue twister upon first reading.
BOYONCE
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
You named your cat Boyonce? Oh lordy, such a stan. Very strong entry. I like the way you guided me through your internal name conflict and gave me insight into how you view yourself/ATRL. I feel like I learned a lot about you from this. I'm impressed.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
I'm dead at you naming yourself after your cat. Good entry.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
I like your name, and the story behind it makes it even more likable. It's cute, funny, and sweet. You also did a great job explaining it. No bad comments.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
I cannot believe that your name comes from the name you gave...your cat. If I were that cat, I would wish that someone would find a way to legally change their name to...I don't know, Garfield? Heathcliff? Bozo the Clown? Just SOMETHING other than Boyonce. But I digress. The STORY itself of how you came up with the name Boyonce for your cat and how you refused to change your username, even after many people thought it was a tacky name, was a truly awesome read. Almost felt like something that deserves to be turned into a ten minute YouTube video. I adored this entry, I really did, and I can't wait to see what you come up with next.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
I’m notifying the police. Identity theft!!! So adorable, but you can pull of Sasha has a boy name. There are plenty of guys with the name Sasha. Now your entry… it was flawless. I loved it. There was character, humor, insight, everything. I had a smile reading your entry, I enjoyed it that much. Only downside, its length. We don’t want novels, but we want that kind of entry shortened down. Great job!
EDGEOFADDICTION
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
Really fantastic. Told a great story without ever being boring. Showed tons of personality. While it didn't feel long when I was reading, it is quite lengthy. My love of this entry doesn't mean every entry you do should be this drawn out. Try to work on being more concise. Wonderful work thus far.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
Very interesting and engaging. Nice.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
what kind of disaster? What kind of unexpected ending? 10/10, just for the places that roller coaster of an entry took us.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
"Pause as I take a break to watch the WFL video and commence to have a minor breakdown, reminiscent of Rob Pattinson's when he found out Kristin banged her father"...that might just be the funniest thing I have read during my time as a ANTM judge. In fact, a lot of this entry was enjoyable and funny. In fact, I'd go as far as to say that...
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
I was reading this with my parents in the room! I started busting up laughing cause of the ending! Sweet baby Jesus Your entry was full of character and all about you. What I didn’t get is how it represents you. It portrays your 3 favs (you best stan for the Breakaway album!!!!!), but saying who you are. You were skimming the surface, but never really dove in to how EdgeOfAddiction is you.
DILLONATRL
Quote:
Originally posted by Evun
It's fine. "My username is pretty simple, but I am not" -- show, don't tell. I don't get much from this entry that makes you stand out. It's quite average. Next time, show more of yourself and what makes you not so simple.
Quote:
Originally posted by Deuces.
Nice entry. Good amount of content. Cool.
Quote:
Originally posted by Katie
don't make me grab my glasses just to read your entry. Custom fonts are annoying enough, don't make it unreadable. Despite that, you still had a pretty great entry.
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
Your username reminds me that my first ATRL username was *shudder* RyanTRLMan. Thankfully, ATRL allowed for unlimited username changes during those days, so to say that I was ecstatic when I changed my username for the first time would be an understatement. I feel like this is the kind of name that you're going to regret later on, but it could have been worse. It could have been DillonTRLMan. And you're right that choosing a username that reflects who you stand for would have made you stand out less. DillonATRL is exactly the kind of name that will stand out, because it's actually not something that you see every day.
Quote:
Originally posted by Matty
Proxy server? Had a friend make an account for you? Are you a duplicate? While I question, let’s get to your entry. It was okay. We got a sense of you, but not about your name. For example, why’d you chose to have Dillon instead of your regular name Dylan? Why did you put ATRL at the end, we know what forum you are on? “My username is pretty simple, but I am not.” That sounded like a to be continued, and I didn’t like that.
Now that you have met with the judges,
when you return only 13 of you will be moving on to becoming ATRL's Next Top Member!
Thank for the feedback judges. I used the quotes so much so I wouldn't be advertising the "Zune" just for the purpose of that. I can understand the overwhelming explanations I have, I blame my honors classes where we would write 10 pg papers AT A MINIMUM!!!
I'll work on what you said if I make it to the next round.
I also liked that you basically included the contents of the video below, for those of us who didn't want to watch the video but get the gist of what you were saying. It's always nice to ensure that you're not just letting the video do the talking.
A bit messy, but in a charming way. Fantastic pictures. I wish you had tied this back to you as a user more (what's your personal energy?), but I like the theme and ATRL connection a lot nonetheless.
I like that it showed your personality and had some flair without being overdone. The Nicki sig comment made me giggle inside. The entry is interesting without being gimmicky. Well done.
I liked this entry, primarily because you yourself noted that it would have been silly and try hard to give yourself a name like "Nicki 4 Life", because what if you don't like her a year from now? Then, unless you get ATRL+, you're stuck with that name. And you have to live with that username and tell people that you're not REALLY into Nicki...and it would just get messy. Trust me, it was a SMART decision to choose your name as your username.
" part makes you seem unsure of yourself.
Okay, it was a nice entry and I appreciate your honesty. However, it seemed like you questioned yourself, your name, and your entry with “Thats the end of my story I think.” Then quickly said your last sentence to cover it up. So you used a name that you really didn’t make up yourself, own it while being real.
I liked they way you tied it all to the present at the end. I do hope you show more to yourself beyond your usual classy/mature theme in future entries.
I like how you transitioned from the past to present. Different. I like it.
Very strong entry. I like the way you guided me through your internal name conflict and gave me insight into how you view yourself/ATRL. I feel like I learned a lot about you from this. I'm impressed.
Your entry was full of character and all about you. What I didn’t get is how it represents you. It portrays your 3 favs (you best stan for the Breakaway album!!!!!), but saying who you are. You were skimming the surface, but never really dove in to how EdgeOfAddiction is you.
Custom fonts are annoying enough, don't make it unreadable. Despite that, you still had a pretty great entry.