After the deadline, you have an hour before you get a penalty for that round.
If you are late more than an hour, or if you are within the hour right after the deadline twice, you gain .5 points onto your average automatically. For every three hours you are late after that first hour, you get another .5 points added.
For my sexual innuendo trinity, I went with three sugary sweet, sort of novelty-type songs that are all upbeat and happy sounding, but when you look behind the imaginary curtain, things aren't always so sweet.
When I was a wee lass, back when I still spoke to my mother, we would always listen to this song together and laugh and sing. My mother always got such a kick out of it, I always thought because it was such a cute, fun song about going shopping in the city. Well one day, mama randomly told me "This song isn't really about going down town to go shopping you know.." and I'm like "ohrly?" "Listen harder to the lyrics," she would say. And listen I did.
"And you may find somebody kind to help and understand you
someone who is just like you and needs a gentle hand to
guide them along..."
..
"So maybe I'll see you there,
We can forget all our troubles, forget all our cares.."
...
"And go downtown!
Things will be great when you're downtown!
Don't wait a minute more, downtown!
Everything is waiting for you... downtown"
Down Town is about the joy of hooking up with strangers. Casual sex, random hookups, etc. The joys of one night stands. I feel like the song could be used for Craigslist commercials. I never sang this song with my mama again btw.
"The lion sleeps tonight" is obviously code for "some hardcore ****ing is happening nearby".
Every time they mention it in the song there are some operatic screams and moans happening & people speaking in tongues, and it gets louder as the song progresses.
In the mighty jungle, near the peaceful village, hush my darling, the lion sleeps tonight.
I feel like there's some rough public sex happening in the "jungle", so loud they can hear it in the "village", then some parent is comforting their child that is frightened at night by the deranged sex addicts "hush my darling, it is just the lion sleeping"
"YAS DADDY, GIVE IT TO ME HARDER YASSS JUS LIKE THAAAAAAHHHHHHHH-- A WEEEEE-E-E-EMAH AHH WEH MUHwEH"
There's a reason this song is played during many-a sex scene in quite a few movies, most notably Ace Ventura: Pet Detective.
This song is obviously a roleplay fantasy fetish anthem.
The guy has some kind of D&S (dominance & submission) fetish and his idea of a perfect woman is for her to be like Barbie. His girlfriend tells him that they can play his sick games, as long as he says he loves her and that she is always his, forever and ever.
"You can touch,
you can play,
if you say "I'm always yours""
He agrees, so she slaps on a blonde wig and.. "Dress me up, make it tight, I'm your dolly." She can now transform into anything his heart desires, just like Barbie, a real life chameleon. Barbie can be whoever she wants to be! Including a **** apparently.
"Make me walk, make me talk, do whatever you please,
I can act like a star, I can beg on my knees."
In conclusion ladies and gays, don't sell yourself so short, if your man has some sick fantasies, get more than just "I love you" unlike this bimbo. I'd go for a Disney cruise personally.
Navyofbadgals
T H E _ S E X U A L _ I N N U E N D O S _ T R I N I T Y
FRUIT VERSION
LED ZEPPELIN - THE LEMON SONG
click to play
Squeeze me baby, till the juice runs down my leg.
The way you squeeze my lemon, I'm gonna fall right out of bed.
I'm gonna leave my children down on this killing floor.
BECK - PEACHES AND CREAM
click to play
Don't tell your right hand baby
What your left hand do
Give those pious soldiers
Another lollipop
Peaches and Cream
You make a garbage man scream
Such a delicate thing
WARRANT - CHERRY PIE
click to play
Swing it! All night long,
Swing it!
Swingin the bathroom
Swingin' on the floor
Swingin' so hard
We forgot to lock the door
In walks her daddy
Standin' six foot four
He said you ain't gonna swing
With my daughter no more
She's my cherry pie
Superpower
This #1 song sung by everyone from kids to grandmothers is about being in an orgy after getting drunk at the club, not playing tourist in London.
These Walls represent the hardships women face in their life but that's not the end of it. The walls are also women's genitals. And when Kendrick talks about demolishing the walls, he means having sex.
As a 90s kid, I grew up listening to many songs, bopping around in the back seat of our car to my cassettes and hit clips, my tiny gay ass not knowing what these songs were actually telling me.
Hanson - MMMBop
The Justin Biebers of the 90s, everyone loved Hanson for being so cute and innocent and crap. Well, this song isn't as innocent as their attempted Kurt Cobain hair suggests. There is a common theme in the song about this flower, with lyrics "Plant a seed, plant a flower, plant a rose, You can plant any one of those, Keep planting to find out which one grows". I bet Hanson would just LOVE this repetitive "planting." Other lyrics "Which flower's going to grow?, Which flower's going to grow?" suggests it's obviously more than just a normal flower. I'm sure they got a lot of blooming flowers in their time as a band at least.
5ive - When The Lights Go Out
Tymps' example had the great B*Witched. Guess who joined B*Witched in a Disney Channel concert special in the late 90s? These flops. I don't know which Disney official thought it would be good for their channel to promote these two. Between the lyrics "Babe I swear you will succumb to me, So baby come to me, when the lights go out!" and the cringe worthy rap section, "When I flick da switch, Make ya hips wanna dip now, I can get you off, Cos I'm ready and equipped now, swing for me baby give me all that you got, never wanna stop cos ya make me feel hot." I bopped along as a kid thinking it was about Narnia or something random, never knowing the real meaning.
Ace of Base - All That She Wants
Ace of Base is one of my FAVORITES, I had their cassette as a kid and listened to it all the time. But this song made no sense to my young self at the time. "All that she wants is another baby, she's gone tomorrow" made it seem like she was stealing children from a foster home or something. Other lyrics such as "So if you are in sight and the day is right, she's the hunter you're the fox" and "It is a night for passion, but the morning means goodbye....she's going to get you" paints the picture of a sexually influenced business woman, well not a complete business woman but a w h o r e. At least Ace of Base was ahead of their time with the feminist movement.
Witch_Privilege
Sexual Seduction The Innuendo Trinity
Welcome, judges, to Witch's Sexual Seduction trinity. You are now entering the Witch's Manor. This is where you come to explore your fantasies. To experience your deepest desires. Now please go take your key, and enter your room. Enjoy some drinks and relax while you wait your turn.
Kitt
Prince - Little Red Corvette "Little red Corvette
Baby you're much too fast
Little red Corvette
You need a love that's gonna last"
Kitt, you're up first baby. I know you're a little firecracker just waiting to burst. Your body is smooth and fast, so give me the keys, and let me try and tame your little red love machine. You conquer men whenever you go, and I know I'll be another on your list, but let's try to make this one to remember, babe.
Hugamari
Christina Aguilera - Genie in a Bottle "I'm a genie in a bottle
You gotta rub me the right way
If you wanna be with me
I can make your wish come true"
Huga, you make my insides flutter when you're around. But if you rub me the right way, all those nerves will go away, and you'll free me of all my inhibitions. You be my Aladdin, and I'll be your genie that grants your every wish. Command me, and it's done.
Buddy
Ginuwine - Pony "If you're horny lets do it, ride it, my pony
My saddle's waiting, come and jump on it"
I know exactly what you want, Buddy. C'mon and ride on this pony. We can start off at a nice trot, and work our way up to a full gallop. Things will get nasty, but you'll love every moment. I'm going to leave you sore, but it will be the ride of your life.
wesleywalrus
Innuendos
Sesame Street Theme
We all know that Sesame Street is a children's show from some time ago, where Big Bird, the Cookie Monster, Oscar, Grover, Ernie and Elmo would "touch" children and help them "learn" new things
Kelis - Milkshake
And what could these muppets persuade children with to come with them to their houses after school? Only the sweetest and most decadent dessert of them all - Milkshakes!
Tori Amos - Raspberry Swirl
And what flavor is that milkshake gonna be? How about a delicious, lush, raspberry flavor. Yum yum yum!
For this trinity, I wanted to show a progression of innuendos in songs, in terms of usage (getting less and less subtle), and I wanted to have the common thread of female artists as the main artist. Plus, these are all songs that are total guilty pleasures for me and are very polarizing for some people.
Right out the gate, "Worth It" comes out with "Give it to me, I'm worth it," so clearly the girls want their men to give it to them hard. Then Dinah talks about how she might give it to him and that even though she may take a lot of stuff, "she can back it up" . I wonder what she can back it up with . Finally, the biggest thing is when Camila says to "come harder" because she doesn't like it soft but rather "a little rough, not too much, but maybe just enough." CLEARLY, she wants him and wants him to do things for her. I think this song is very subtle with the innuendos and can easily have moments where you can be like "That's what she said" and totally get away with it.
Well, the song is called Love Myself, so clearly it's a self-masturbatory anthem. I mean, in the music video, Hailee is wearing a shirt that says Self Service . However, let's start at the beginning of the song and how she gets chills at night and feels "it deep inside" without him. She knows how to satisfy herself without him and "to keep that tempo right" too. THEN, she's going to "touch the pain away" and "scream [her] name," which is slightly unusual for masturbating but you do you, Hailee. But she's going to just keep on loving herself and she just doesn't need anyone else. But wait, it gets better . She's going to just take it nice and slow and feel good without her man. And now, she's "speaking in tongues," which I mean, duh, if you don't know what this is supposed to mean...just imagine ****. Got it in your head? Good. Now, imagine the climax. Do you get what I'm trying to get at???
This song is the epitome of innuendo on top of innuendo and more. I don't want to go through all of it because I'd probably bore you all to tears. The song is mainly about how Skylar wants this man to let her ride his bicycle . But please tell me that you all know what a bicycle is? PLEASE. I DON'T WANT TO TELL YOU.
Fine. I'll spill.
A bicycle is a male's genitalia. OR And she wants him to taste her watermelons too. I'm more surprised that she didn't reference her cherry too. That always seems like a common innuendo. ANYWAYS, the song is filled with various innuendos to the watermelons, bicycle, the whole "comin', comin', comin'. Ohhhh" part, and how she can suck out all the poison in a bee sting, which I AM NOT going to go into detail about (as much as you might want me to ).
NOTE:
This was my attempt at being sorta slightly but not really serious and kinda humorous too, which is how I work. I'm not the type that'll go "YAAAAAAAAAAAS" or hunTee or "SLAY BITCH SLAY." If you didn't appreciate it...
Lynx
Welcome to Little Lynx's Confectionarium and Bakehouse! I'm pretty sure I just made up that word, but it's my store, so what does it matter? You're in for a real treat today. We're lucky to have three of our most skilled candy connoisseurs in store today to demonstrate what we offer, from cookies and cakes to croissants and cola. We really do have it all!
We got that coca cola bottle shaped... candy! There's nothing like cola-flavoured candy, and Inna has perfected her recipe. This is actually one of our signature candies and we ship it all around the globe. Inna makes a good point when she asks, "but how much cola can your body take?" which is obviously her referring to dietary requirements and a risk of diabetes. With such a sugary candy that's always a concern. Cola candy is a real party hit, so make sure to buy some in bulk for your next social gathering and be the crowd favourite!
Moving on to the bakehouse, our newest addition is a special cake recipe line crafted by pastry chef Joe. These cakes are a real hit with beach-goers as the beach is just across the road from our store and it's just too easy to grab a slice or even a cake-pop and have some cake by the ocean. Our chefs have crafted two new lines inspired by the beach, including "sea-salted caramel" and "seaweed and rice pudding" flavour. We have packet mix too if you wish to make your own!
Finally, let's head back into the kitchen where Kerli will demonstrate the very beginning stages of some of our finest sweets. We use our own special plantation of naturally pink sugarcane that only grows in a remote region in Estonia in all of our sweets, it has a natural burst of sweetness, lovely subtle pink colour and is actually less harmful to the body than regular sugars. It's the kind of sugar you can treat yourself with forever with less long-term risk of health issues. Here Kerli is making "sugar kisses", a little bite-size confection which are very addicting. Here's a free sample, but be warned, it's easy to OD!
Thank you for visiting our store, please feel free to explore the rest of the store and purchase anything you like, and then head on over to the beach over the road for some cake by the ocean!
@Moonchild
Contestants: who do you think will make Golden Trinity? If you're feeling mean, who do you think will be Flop Trinity? Discuss.