These are the suckage of the suck. Enjoy.
Close Calls:
Clay Aiken, "This Is The Night" (2003)
Fergie, "London Bridge" (2006)
Ludacris featuring Pharrell, "Money Maker" (2006)
10. Fantasia, "I Believe" (2004)
- The first of 2 American Idol winner songs in the top 10. Bottom line is, the **** ain't good. It does not match her style AT ALL (like most of these AI winner songs
). She shouldn't have won in the first place, the trick can't even read. How the **** did she sing then to get this all the way to #1?!?!?!??!?! Actually, Season 3 was a joke in general. Just be happy no one from that season is really remembered.
09. Taylor Hicks, "Do I Make You Proud" (2006)
- Well here we are at the next American Idol song. Again, can we say corny?!? And I could've sworn there was an age cutoff to even get onto the show. Oh well, this travesty was Grandpa's first and ONLY #1 (actually song to even chart - even Katharine McPhee's more relevant
). God, I hope you never come back, you sad flop.
08. Nelly, "Grillz" (2006)
- So before I begin, I could've sworn the term "grillz" was worn out like 3 years before this song EVEN CAME OUT.
Anyway, this sad, pathetic song went to #1 (surprise, right?). This song (along with "Pimp Juice" and the God awful "Wadsyaname") have created the downfall of Nelly. Guess that's what happens when you date Ashanti
. Oh btw, we'll see her later...
07. Crazy Town, "Butterfly" (2001)
- So when I was looking up the songs to begin with, I can't believe this climbed all the way to the summit...oh wait, this is America, maybe I can. This **** is just bad. I can't even find words to describe it. So I end here.
06. T-Pain, "Buy U A Drank" (2007)
- Ok, so most #1 acts aren't talented and they don't even try to hide it, but THIS MOTHER ****ER TRIES TO MAKE IT SEEM LIKE HE CAN SING!
How pathetic. I mean seriously...and let's not forget to mention that this pitiful song became a key catch phrase at white kid parties that try to act ghetto. "Hey Debbie, I'mma buy u a DRANK"..."Oh, lol"...NOT.
05. Juvenile, "Slow Motion" (2004)
- This song is like diarrhea that just won't go away. Next.
04. Sean Kingston, "Beautiful Girls" (2007)
- Ok, first off, you can't sing. Anyone who likes you should die. You use a fake accent. Who does that? You smell. You sample anything with a beat. I think if you found a popular song that did nothing but fart, you would sample it. At least be good at sampling, k? Did I mention you're fat too?
03. Shaggy, "Angel" (2001)
- So back when I was in middle school, this song was HUGE...and I never understood. I can't believe that God awful album that produced this terrible song went what, DIAMOND? Pathetic. This song is terrible, and along with his "reggae" voice, it makes me want to punt kittens. No lie.
02. Ja Rule featuring Ashanti, "Always on Time" (2002)
- Ok, before I start, please none of you better lie. You liked Ja Rule & Ashanti at one point in your life. DON'T LIE. You found yourself rapping along to a Ja Rule song. You found yourself singing along to "Foolish." So please, just don't lie...but this song right here sucked back then, and still sucks now. I actually heard it on the radio today and it gave me the idea of doing this blog. But nothing I could ever say about this piece of trash could hurt them more than they have already been pounded. Ja Rule has been owned by 50 Cent (who was just owned by Kanye West), so he can keep trying, but he's basically dog poo. And Ashanti...oh Ashanti, you MUST shave those side burns of yours, and add words other than "oooh baby" into your vocabulary. So, "Declaration" is coming out December 11th, yes? Well, I declare a flop. Go back to sucking Irv's dick, bitch!
01. D4L, "Laffy Taffy" (2006)
- This hitting #1 is sadder than anything in this world...sadder than MIMS, Soulja Boy, Sean Kingston, etc. A song about a ****ing PIECE OF CANDY. Not even a dance, but a piece of candy.
I can stop here though, because no one even knows who they are.
i don't use it
