7. Armin van Buuren vs. Sophie Ellis-Bextor Not Giving Up On Love
I used to be a huge Armin van Buuren fan. I used to be a huge Sophie Ellis-Bextor fan. They’ve both lost a bit of my attention is recent years, but pair them together on one fantastic track and it becomes very clear to me why I loved them both at one point in time. My musical preferences sort of shifted. Sophie lost her appeal and I was no longer a hardcore trance music enthusiast or particularly fond of some of Armin’s musical changes. I never expected them to collaborate and create one of my favorite tracks of the year, the #7 entry on this countdown, “Not Giving Up On Love”. I’m not particularly sure why I love this song so much. I think Sophie’s vocals are beautiful, but I can’t stop myself from pointing out times where I think she sounds sloppy. Armin literally threw everything he could think of in this production and I love it, even though I recognize that at times it sounds a bit cluttered. Despite it all, I can’t help but love this track.
The Best Bit: 1:35 through 2:18 is amazing. I realize this is a sizable portion of the track, but listen to it. I love the way it builds, then there’s the break and the piano melody goes wonky and starts stutter a bit and then some symphonic strings sweep in and all the while Sophie’s voice is shining above all of it. Amazing.
6. Katy Perry Teenage Dream
I was completely dismissive of this song when it was only a rumored title, but can you really blame me? A grown ass woman performing a song called “Teenage Dream”? It just shouldn’t work, but it absolutely does. It works so well because it’s not in any way similar to what I expected to hear. The word teenage would generally imply something inherently juvenile, and while there’s a certain sappiness to this that could be perceived as immaturity, I find the sweetness and overblown romanticism of this track oddly adult and appropriate only for listeners above the age of 18. I hope that my personal teenage dream will come into my life at some point in the near future, but in the meantime I’m content listening to Katy and fantasizing about my own fairytale romance.
The Best Bit: The entire thing.
5. Ke$ha We R Who We R
This song is good old fashioned Ke$ha brand fun. Nothing else really needs to be said about it, but I would like to take a moment to address a claim made by a certain pressed stanbase that think their fave has an authority over all things inspirational. Does “We Are Who We Are” scream, WE’RE HERE AND WE’RE QUEER! the way you might expect a Gaga-penned anthem of tolerance to do? Absolutely not, and as far as I’m concerned, thank God it doesn’t. We have Gaga to fill this niche of singers, who because they’ve adopted a platform of advocacy from early on, are in a perfect position to release songs that by their titles alone make a very obvious statements (“Born this Way”). For Ke$ha to try and compete with Miss Gay Pride would be ridiculous, and for what it’s worth, it wouldn’t be true to the sort of artist Ke$ha is. She’s not an activist and she’s not the intellectual man’s preferred pop star, so she automatically has two strikes against her should she attempt to make any sort of claim that a certain song was inspired by certain events or is dedicated to a certain cause, but the simple fact of the matter is, if Ke$ha comes up with a song that’s for the **** or inspired by the ****, she’s more than allowed to explain the source of inspiration or intended dedication. She won’t be lisping as she sings it, she probably won’t make a direct reference to the notion that homosexuality is not a choice, and the whole thing won’t have a depressingly somber tone to mirror the plight of the gay community, but this idea of we are who we hits upon the message of tolerance and acceptance of others (the very same message that’s preached by Lady Gaga and many others who word it more eloquently than Ke$ha and therefore their words carry more clout), regardless of their sexuality, gender, race, and what have you. But you guys are right, Ke$ha was only using the gay suicides as publicity, she doesn’t actually care about GLBT issues, and if she did she would be a lot more in our face with her support of the gay community. She would mention them more in interviews, she would have appeared at events urging congress to repeal DADT, she would fill her videos with gay imagery, and would beat us over the head with her credibility within the gay community. And she certainly wouldn’t have been able to rush the writing and recording process for “We Are Who We Are” enough for it to actually coincide with public outcry following the wave of gay suicides, because it takes at least 6 months for anyone to pen a track and at least another 6 months after that for notorious sound recyclers like Dr. Luke who produce a song once every 3 years, don’t know their way around a studio at all, and have no set process for the creation of a track, to come up with the actual backing production. Yep. (See: Dr. Luke can do all of that **** in the matter of a couple days because he’s done it a thousand times before and is very capable in a studio.)
The Best Bit: “Got Jesus on my neck-a-lus-us-uzzzzzz.”
I would think "cuz we make the hipsters fall in love" would be a better bit?
And I'm always here for Sophie, and hoping that the album comes out this year.
I'm thinking of quite a fee best bits that are better than the best bit I picked.
And I'm excited for Sophie's new material, too! If it strikes me the right way it could be the album that ropes me back in and makes her one of my favorite artists again.
You know that I love you boy. Hot like Mexico, rejoice. At this point I’ve gotta choose, nothing to lose… Don’t turn around, cause you might see my heart breaking. Don’t turn around. I don’t want you seeing me cry. Just walk away. It’s tearing me apart that you’re leaving. I’m letting you go, but I won’t let you know. The thematic and musical links are undeniable. “Alejandro” is the most brilliant moment in the respective discographies of Lady Gaga and RedOne if for no other reason than the fact that it sounds like the 2010 comeback single Ace of Base should have released, but never actually would release because they don’t have Gaga’s pretentious nature and they’re certainly not into lyrics that could be left open to any sort of interpretation… and for what it’s worth Ace of Base sans the Berggren sisters just aren’t worth anyone’s time, so even this gem of a track would have failed in their hands. By now, every confused gay teenager that stans for Lady Gaga because she’s an inspiration and “allows” them to be who they are (She’ll be the death to the concept of self worth because insecure kids from here on out will look first and foremost to the outspoken celebrity allies of the gay community for acceptance. The idea of coming to terms with issues on any sort of personal level is completely irrelevant when you base your self-worth entirely on the acceptance of your favorite famous God-like figure) are tired of all those foggy old reviewers who drew the same Ace of Base (and to a lesser extent ABBA and “La Isla Bonita”) comparisons I have just made, but the thing these kids will never realize is that 90s music and brilliant pop acts like Ace of Base will forever **** on Lady Gaga. These comparisons should not be taken as insults, for it is an honor of the highest order to be compared to any Swedish superstar musical group, particularly Ace of Base. With “Alejandro”, Gaga and RedOne have come up with a wonderful homage to several superior acts of the past. It’s one huge part Ace of Base, one part ABBA, and one smaller part Madonna’s “La Isla Bonita” (I would say a larger part “La Isla Bonita” but this song isn’t so straightforwardly Latin, it’s more like this odd blend of Latin and Slavic elements that really should sound horrendous). Ever the thinking man’s pop star Gaga’s lyrics are open to any number of interpretations depending upon one’s ability to recognize cryptic references to homosexuality (if one is a homosexual one can do this with every song because all homosexuals, including myself, are self obsessed), one’s ability to ignore more obvious signs that this is just a breakup song of sorts that references several lovers of Hispanic origin, or one’s ability to buy into “I’m making a music video that’s for my gay fans, who are allowed to be gay because I accept them and give them the courage to be who they are!” hype statements. For me, Gaga’s contributions are outshined by RedOne’s stellar production work, which I consider to be the best of his career. It’s his mesh of Ace of Base beats, those plucky chords that hit on every off beat, that crispy-crunchity-distorted sidechained bassline and that Fiddler on the Roof-esque violin line that make this track absolutely addictive.
The Best Bit: Every second, thanks to RedOne... and to Gaga a little bit, I guess, I suppose… I mean, not to give her too much credit or anything cause she gets enough.
3. Rihanna Rudeboy
Excuse me Rihanna, but I believe it is you who is being rude with your overly-aggressive sexual come-ons and downright mean taunts about said rude boy’s possible erectile dysfunction and potentially undersized manhood. But seriously, Rihanna is horny as hell, and her desire to be ****ed by some ill-behaved juvenile delinquents, though somewhat questionable, makes for one hell of a sexy pop song. “Rude Boy” is the sort of song you could see some under-sexualized, borderline puritanical, pop star trying to pull off as an act of rebellion against dear old dadager, but in any other hands the song would be laughable. Every demeaning and crude word coming out of Rihanna’s mouth hits with the force of a thousand pelvic thrusts. The lust is palpable and generous thump of the beat is enough to make even the most virginal of listeners want to shake their asses. The whole thing gives me this visual of Rihanna going down a line of men and inspecting each potential sex partner for an adequately sized penis; the guys who come up short being dismissed with a devious chuckle. Her sexually charged affect on this song is believable enough to make such visuals seem not at all over-the-top. This was recorded sometime after the collapse of Chrihanna, and considering this, Rihanna’s need for a little dick is perhaps understandable as the hand, the vibrator and the Jay-Z camel penis can only do so much. If tracks like “Rude Boy” are the result of an undersexed Rihanna needing to let out a little sexual tension through music, I say buckle on the chastity belt and throw away the key.
The Best Bit: The amazing bits are here in abundance.
Tonight I’mma let you be the captain. Tonight I’mma let you do your thing, yeah. Tonight I’mma let you be a rider. Giddy up, giddy up, giddy up babe.
Do you like it, boy? I want want want, what you want want want. Give it to me baby like boom boom boom.
I like the way you touch me there. I like the way you pull my hair. Babe, if I don’t feel it I ain’t fakin’, no-no.
2. Kylie Minogue Get Outta My Way
Brilliance. That one word would be enough to sum up Kylie Minogue’s “Get Outta My Way” but I feel the need to elaborate just a bit on why this song is so absolutely ****ing amazing that it just narrowly missed the top spot on my countdown of the year’s best singles. You don’t use Kylie cause she’s old, she has big teeth and you hate all things Australian because a dingo ate your baby. I know. Those were all the same reasons I didn’t really use Kylie prior to 2010. As a gay man I was always instinctively drawn to her disco ready sound, but my admiration for her couldn’t have been described as anything other than casual fan-ery. I thought of the singles from Fever as the pinnacle of her greatness (they are great, but you simply must learn to appreciate tracks like “Chocolate” and “Confide in Me” and you must sample some of her late 80s and early 90s stuff even though the Stock Aitken Waterman influence sometimes makes this a difficult task) and I loved X (X is nowhere as terrible as some people make it out to be, but it’s nowhere near as good as I insisted it was). So 2010 comes along and Kylie is preparing to launch Aphrodite and the whole album probably wouldn’t have been on my radar had people not been buzzing about how Britney’s people had originally tried to place dibs on “Get Out of My Way”. Natural stan inclination lead me to believe that Kylie’s performance on this track wouldn’t hold a candle to the amazingness that could have been Britney’s version, but I was so horribly wrong. For one, this track wouldn’t have worked for Britney as anything other than forgotten album filler. “Get Out of My Way” has too mature of a sound (in terms of production, lyrically it could possibly work) for it to appear on a Britney’s album, much less be selected as a single, which is the sort attention a track like this deserves. But secondly (and most importantly), Kylie’s performance on this track is too perfect to be denied. She so capably delivers the necessary sassiness and confidence of this better step up your game or I’ll find your replacement anthem, that I actually have a hard time believing Britney or anyone else could provide such a well executed interpretation. It was enough to convince me once and for all of Kylie’s remarkable talents, and it was enough to get me to buy Aphrodite, an album which would go on to become one of my favorites of the year and inspire me to research her discography further. Lucas Secon’s production is lush, energetic, and serves as the perfect accompaniment for this ode to deadbeat men. I anxiously await some moment in my own life where I can dedicate this song to a man who won’t put forth the necessary effort.
The Best Bit: The epic chorus, Lucas Secon’s amazing production, the cute sassiness of Kylie’s interpretation… everything really.
i love Armin van Buuren, amazing 
Teenage Dream 
♥ / We R Who We R 
& Kesha :banana3:
