[as926]

Originally posted by that G.U.Y.

No it's your responsibility to use protection unless you are absolutely sure of who you are having sex with

This is why most religions forbid sex before marriage it eliminates this problem

[as926]

Yes, and at least in half of the states here in the US, you can already be charged criminally if you don't.

[iLays]

I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place with this question.

One of my very good friends got it from his boyfriend cheating on him and giving it to him. He didn't participate in sex for a whole entire year just getting used to it and focusing on himself. He said when he finally started to fool around again he went to some guys house and when he told the guy he had it before they engaged in anything, tha guy spit on him, screamed "Get tha **** outta my house", and kicked him out of his house.

So i completely understand why one wouldn't want to tell someone. But then again, give people tha choice as to if they still wanna participate in having sex with you.

[Devon]

Nope.

Sexual responsibility lies on oneself. You are the only responsible to make sure you don't contract HIV.

[Soup in Teapot]

NO. Play URSELF ALONG PLZ. BYE.

[abrahamjmr]

Originally posted by iLays

I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place with this question.

One of my very good friends got it from his boyfriend cheating on him and giving it to him. He didn't participate in sex for a whole entire year just getting used to it and focusing on himself. He said when he finally started to fool around again he went to some guys house and when he told the guy he had it before they engaged in anything, tha guy spit on him, screamed "Get tha **** outta my house", and kicked him out of his house.

So i completely understand why one wouldn't want to tell someone. But then again, give people tha choice as to if they still wanna participate in having sex with you.

Two users on this thread won't understand what your friend have gone through since they see HIV+ as criminals and seem to have some sort of hate for them. You can see them spreading hate towards HIV+ in any thread related to this topic.

[Allie]

Originally posted by Giselle

Anyone who does this is a terrible person. Condom or not.

Yes. 100%.

[Allie]

If HIV positive people are scared of the stigmas/danger, then maybe date someone else that also has it? Download a dating app for it or something. I'm sorry, but this isn't an excuse to not inform someone of your status before sex.

[Latinazza]

Originally posted by This Is Acting

condoms don't always work.

A. That's all you took from my post? Quite interesting.
B. You're wrong. You may want to read a few documents on public health and the efficacy of condoms in preventing the transmission of HIV and other sexually transferred conditions. Nothing in life is absolute.

Originally posted by Giselle

Pregnancy is not a life threatening disease, so let's stop the comparison

Fighting HIV is a big part of the line of work I'm going into, so no, I do not believe those infected should be criminalized. However, if you have an (again) LIFE THREATENING disease, yes it is YOUR responsibility to tell every person you sleep with. While we should fight the stigma against the disease, that does not mean we absolve Positive people of their responsibility and talk about this like it's a casual thing.

If you read my post as me equating pregnancy and HIV then you need to sharpen those reading and analytical skills, my dear Gis.

My point is not to absolve HIV+ who have sexual relations without proper disclosure. Those people are indeed doing wrong from any standpoint we may wanna consider. What I am saying is that both parties are responsible for the possibility of transmission. If an HIV- person decides to have casual sex with a stranger, or even someone whom they know well but who could have been recently infected and not know of their recently acquired virus, they are responsible for using the necessary protective measures.

And I find it interesting that all of you who are demonizing individuals who are HIV+ show so little compassion for members of your won community --and use this as some sort of excuse for your own irresponsible actions. I can see several people in this thread who, even if they were given the necessary disclosure beforehand, would still turn around and LIE claiming that they were never told.

A waste of a thread. Some of you are a true disappointment.

[Mani.]

That's so dumb to say both parties are responsible. Like, DUH. That's like saying don't call the police if your store is robbed, because it's your responsibility to have security camera's. Like..

We clearly know consensual sex falls on both parties. BUT if you have an incurable STD, it is not the other person's fault that you did not open your mouth to expose that heinous secret to them.

As bad as it is... by default, everyone is assumed to not have HIV. Hiv is not something we're naturally born with, it is passed on from people, so if someone engages in unprotected sex with you, by default in their mind you don't have it... Which when you think about it, it's not all that unbelievable for them to do so.

If you know your status is positive and you continue to engage in sex with them, knowing you're about to infect them with a life long, crippling disease, then YES. You should be jailed for that.. Especially if the person goes undiagnosed and it can eventually end fatal for them.

Again, you shouldn't have unprotected sex unless you know for sure.. but that does not justify giving someone HIV. At all.

[Dessy Fenix]

Originally posted by Devon

Nope.

Sexual responsibility lies on oneself. You are the only responsible to make sure you don't contract HIV.

How does this even work? Sex isn't a one person job. Yeah the guy can wear a condom but he should also know if they guy have the disease. It's like shaking hand with a dude that coughed and sneezed in his hand and didn't tell me. I may have hand sanitizer handy but why am I being blamed for something I received because I thought he didn't have a cold? And furthermore unless you want us to not have sex at all, victim blaming is pointless.

[Toya]

It's a crime to not disclose your positive status to a sexual partner and rightfully so.

People who are positive and don't tell the people they have sex with are TERRIBLE people who should be locked up away from society.

[Latinazza]

Originally posted by Mani.

That's so dumb to say both parties are responsible. Like, DUH. That's like saying don't call the police if your store is robbed, because it's your responsibility to have security camera's. Like..

What is dumb is this analogy. But do you.

Don't want HIV? Don't open your legs to a stranger without protection, regardless of what they may say.

And again, to clarify my position, if someone KNOWINGLY infects another individual YES it is a criminal act. But for all of you to act like all PLWH belong to some type of predator class wanting to pass the virus onto others is stupid, ignorant, and irresponsible.

But who am I to argue with a bunch of white privileged gays on the internet. As a woman this could easily be something that I shouldn't care for, as my chances of being infected with this virus are significantly lower. And yet, I seem to be one of only three people in this thread asking that all of you think twice before demonizing and stigmatizing others.

But I bet that if any of you ever becomes infected with HIV your point of view will flip so quickly it will leave heads spinning.

I'm out of this thread for good. This is really not my battle.

[Giselle]

Originally posted by abrahamjmr

Having HIV does not make anyone a criminal.
It is as life threatening as any other sexual transmission disease, diabetics, high blood pressure or any other condition. Your point?

Not all the people who live with the condition is looking forward to have unprotected sex. Because of people like you, we have plenty of people hiding their status and that won't change for a while.

1. I never said having HIV makes one a criminal.
2. Considering there are several STDs that don't threaten your life, no, it's not as life threatening as any other sexually transmitted disease.
3. No, not because of people like me. Thinking it's a must for people to disclose their status is not a problem.

[DejaVu]

What is this mess on the first page.

Condoms don't fully protect against HIV.

[abrahamjmr]

Originally posted by Giselle

1. I never said having HIV makes one a criminal.
2. Considering there are several STDs that don't threaten your life, no, it's not as life threatening as any other sexually transmitted disease.
3. No, not because of people like me. Thinking it's a must for people to disclose their status is not a problem.

I am not against people disclosing their status at all. I am against those who are not enough informed and would spill and kick anyone just because they have a condition.

You, Bey Admired and some other user are making it seem like HIV+ people are criminals if they don't want to disclose their status and face ignorant people who would turn their backs on them like they were dangerous or something. When two people decide to have sex, whether it's casual or not, they need to take every step to make it safe. It isn't just an HIV+ person's responsibility, because as I said, some don't know they have the virus. Would you blame them and jail them as well?

Thinking is a must for people to disclose their status isn't a problem, the problem is people who turn out to be discriminatory against people who have HIV.

[abrahamjmr]

Originally posted by DejaVu

What is this mess on the first page.

Condoms don't fully protect against HIV.

They are 95% effective. It is better to be protected a 95% than not wearing protection at all, don't you think? And people whose load is undetectable are not going to pass the virus to anyone. That's how medicine has advanced so much in the past few decades.

[abrahamjmr]

Originally posted by Latinazza

What is dumb is this analogy. But do you.

Don't want HIV? Don't open your legs to a stranger without protection, regardless of what they may say.

And again, to clarify my position, if someone KNOWINGLY infects another individual YES it is a criminal act. But for all of you to act like all PLWH belong to some type of predator class wanting to pass the virus onto others is stupid, ignorant, and irresponsible.

But who am I to argue with a bunch of white privileged gays on the internet. As a woman this could easily be something that I shouldn't care for, as my chances of being infected with this virus are significantly lower. And yet, I seem to be one of only three people in this thread asking that all of you think twice before demonizing and stigmatizing others.

But I bet that if any of you ever becomes infected with HIV your point of view will flip so quickly it will leave heads spinning.

I'm out of this thread for good. This is really not my battle.

Love your point of view and the way you stated it. You did it better than some people.

[Giselle]

Originally posted by abrahamjmr

I am not against people disclosing their status at all. I am against those who are not enough informed and would spill and kick anyone just because they have a condition.

You, Bey Admired and some other user are making it seem like HIV+ people are criminals if they don't want to disclose their status and face ignorant people who would turn their backs on them like they were dangerous or something. When two people decide to have sex, whether it's casual or not, they need to take every step to make it safe. It isn't just an HIV+ person's responsibility, because as I said, some don't know they have the virus. Would you blame them and jail them as well?

Thinking is a must for people to disclose their status isn't a problem, the problem is people who turn out to be discriminatory against people who have HIV.

Yeah, if you don't disclose and proceed to have sex, you're a bad person. And yes, you do bear more of a burden because you are the one with the disease.

I will not coddle this type of behavior.

[Mezik]

Firstly - why would anyone have sex with a stranger or as a hookup unprotected?

Secondly - No. It is just as up to the individual without HIV as it is to the person with HIV to enforce a condom, if you choose not to follow the necessary precautions than its hard to feel bad for you.

I had a scare last fall where I decided to have unprotected anal sex with a guy on Grindr, and turns out two guys he had sex with previously contracted HIV. Thankfully, it was a random chance that those two guys got it from somebody else after I had sex with him. But guess what, the first thing in my head wasn't "Why didn't this skank tell me he had an STI now my life is over" it was "Wow, I really screwed up and should've been more affirmative on wearing a condom."

We're all grown-ups, we all know he facts. If you want to do something stupid and not enforce a random sexual partner to wear a condom than don't cry wolf of point fingers when you contract a disease. It's just as much your fault.