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Tournament: PLATINUM HIT 9
Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 7,250
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Quote:
Originally posted by Jackson
I don't know if you could be any more pretentious actually
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 57,339
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Quote:
Originally posted by Jackson
I don't know if you could be any more pretentious actually
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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Fefe sliding through with that win 
I'm super happy I made it to the Top 25, maybe I won't peak so early this time?
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Member Since: 8/18/2013
Posts: 2,811
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Okay, so that wasn't too bad. Totally going to get higher next round though... I hope
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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Round 2 in 6 hours, how exciting 
let me finish reading through the lashings y'all got
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Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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Quote:
Originally posted by Obsession
I expected to be out of the competition after swiftie's review, but then that was actually the harshest one 
I'm proud that I made it to top 20, I'm looking at the people ahead and below me and a lot of these people have written great songs in past competitions so it's definitely an achievement.
From what I gather, it seems like I'll try to come up with a unique concept then spend more time fleshing it out and tightening up the technique. This round, I had another entry I was working on then this one came to me at literally the last minute (like some hours before deadline) and I feel like had I spent a little more time on it, it would've been a better song. But I'm super happy with how it's done!
 Act of ContritionOh God, the grievous things I’ve done
Oh God, please hear your faithful son
Whenever he leaves, I scrub away his touch
I never sought contrition for myself so much
I betrayed my love, I let our lips meet
I’ve done wrong, may you never grant me peace
He perverted my mind
He corrupted my heart
I let him ravage my body
I still carry the scars
O lord, I beg for absolution
Please grant my love her retribution
Bestow your mercy on me now
Wretched I am to break my vow
Forgive me for letting another in
I let my lust draw me to sin
Sin, sin, sin
I ready my heart to carry out my penance
But why do I now still crave his presence?
Oh God, the grievous things I’ve done
Oh God, please hear your faithful son |
Even though you snatched my #1 from Jackson, I still think you were done wrong. I feel like any other season, this would've got you top 10.
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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Quote:
Originally posted by ceremonials
Are there sign ups for the next round?)
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Quote:
Originally posted by Temporal
Yes. That's why it's not being announced right away.
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Noooo I'm the worst at sign ups
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 57,339
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Here's mine. I'm so so so pleased with a #6 ranking to say how uninspired I felt and insecure I was about the song.
Interlude
I lived behind a closed door
For the longest time
Now through these newborn windows
Virgin sunlight shines
Illuminating through the fresh cracks in the wall
Lights up the room where only darkness used to fall
Four walls could not contain me
With stains still in the carpet
I no longer scrub
I wash away the water
And give way to love
Cautiously I step outside
The world seems so strange
But what I know most of all
Is some things must change
Rejuvenating where the grass had been in drought
Where once was decay, I see flowers sprout...
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Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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I'm gonna make a new sig, AGAIN. LOL
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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Virgin sunlight 
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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UFO
Platinum Hit Charts
| Week | Song | Genre | Peak | Score | Equivalent | | 1. | "In My Head" (Intro) | Indie Rock | #23 | 6.48 | "Brave" |
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Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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Quote:
Originally posted by conatus
Here's mine. I'm so so so pleased with a #6 ranking to say how uninspired I felt and insecure I was about the song.
Interlude
I lived behind a closed door
For the longest time
Now through these newborn windows
Virgin sunlight shines
Illuminating through the fresh cracks in the wall
Lights up the room where only darkness used to fall
Four walls could not contain me
With stains still in the carpet
I no longer scrub
I wash away the water
And give way to love
Cautiously I step outside
The world seems so strange
But what I know most of all
Is some things must change
Rejuvenating where the grass had been in drought
Where once was decay, I see flowers sprout... |
Kinda gave me intro tea! Also, not you also using the word scrub.  Going to sound predictable here and say "Now through these newborn windows / Virgin sunlight shines" was my best part. Idk why Clarkson dragged the newborn windows part (or said he was going to) because I took it as a sort of opportunity being there that wasn't before, with the sunlight representing a more hopeful outlook.  That or I'm reading too much into it.
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Lemme be persistent and post my song for the third time.
Welcome to the World
I see Spring in your eyes
I feel warmth in your smile
I see clear and serene skies
I see meadows far and wide
So pure of heart, so beautiful
With a future shining bright
You’re a wonder, you’re a miracle
Welcome to the world, my child
Although sometimes, in Spring, it rains
The sun still shines upon your face
I hope wherever the wind blows
It takes you where you need to go
I want to see what you become
And yet stay here froze in time
You’re my light, you’re my love
Welcome to the world, my child
Welcome to the world, my child
Welcome to the world
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 13,381
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Here's my flop Intro 
The Whole World is Watching
I look up at the clouds in the sky above me
There was a point where I found them to be lovely
Now I know they’re made of cardboard boxes and strings
To them, success matters more than my well-being
I believe this is my life, not a scheduled airtime
I believe these are my friends, not props paying rent
This isn’t my town, it’s a set where lights go down
If I want I can leave, but what’s out there for me?
And the whole world is watching me as I decide
I want real company not actors in disguise
With two choices paralyzing me, which is right?
I wonder if I will ever see a real sunrise
The whole world watching me is tuned into my show
All I worked for has been for this pivotal role
It would be best if this was the last episode
It’s time to dim the lights, my show’s come to a close
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Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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Hugamari
Welcome to the World
| Week | Song | Genre | Peak | Score | | 1. | "Welcome to the World" (Intro) | Folk, Synth | #2 | 7.98 |
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Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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Quote:
Originally posted by MattyTacos
Here's my flop Intro
The Whole World is Watching
I look up at the clouds in the sky above me
There was a point where I found them to be lovely
Now I know they’re made of cardboard boxes and strings
To them, success matters more than my well-being
I believe this is my life, not a scheduled airtime
I believe these are my friends, not props paying rent
This isn’t my town, it’s a set where lights go down
If I want I can leave, but what’s out there for me?
And the whole world is watching me as I decide
I want real company not actors in disguise
With two choices paralyzing me, which is right?
I wonder if I will ever see a real sunrise
The whole world watching me is tuned into my show
All I worked for has been for this pivotal role
It would be best if this was the last episode
It’s time to dim the lights, my show’s come to a close |
Maybe you flopped because you labelled it an intro when it's obviously an outro.
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Member Since: 8/6/2015
Posts: 18,803
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Less than 6 hours til I'll be unable to see the challenge being posted
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Member Since: 9/1/2012
Posts: 25,973
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In My Head
Knock, knock, knock
Footsteps echo the pulse between my lungs
Frozen in madness, what have I become?
No one wants to fill the hole in my heart
I travel in the dark
At the end of the tunnel I can see
A mirage of flowers waiting for me
I run before I wake up from this dream
Knock, knock, knock
It's all in my head
Or at least that's what they want me to believe
I can't imagine
How you're nothing but a figment in my head
I thought that time had caught up to me
I thought this time I'm finally free
Cause you're in my head
Pure happiness I always wanted
I turn away, I lose foresight
To the warriors of the night
Nobody hears my inner cries
Forced on a roller coaster ride
But it's in my head
All of the memories that I created
They were never real
Now I got nothing but nothing in my head
Knock, knock, knock
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 57,339
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Quote:
Originally posted by UFO
Virgin sunlight
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Thank you. 
Quote:
Originally posted by Hugamari
Kinda gave me intro tea! Also, not you also using the word scrub. Going to sound predictable here and say "Now through these newborn windows / Virgin sunlight shines" was my best part. Idk why Clarkson dragged the newborn windows part (or said he was going to) because I took it as a sort of opportunity being there that wasn't before, with the sunlight representing a more hopeful outlook. That or I'm reading too much into it.
---
Lemme be persistent and post my song for the third time.
Welcome to the World
I see Spring in your eyes
I feel warmth in your smile
I see clear and serene skies
I see meadows far and wide
So pure of heart, so beautiful
With a future shining bright
You’re a wonder, you’re a miracle
Welcome to the world, my child
Although sometimes, in Spring, it rains
The sun still shines upon your face
I hope wherever the wind blows
It takes you where you need to go
I want to see what you become
And yet stay here froze in time
You’re my light, you’re my love
Welcome to the world, my child
Welcome to the world, my child
Welcome to the world |
Thank you! Yeah, "newborn windows" and "virgin sunlight" are representing a new hope/opportunity being there that wasn't before and being untainted by the past. The whole interlude is essentially about escaping your past and no longer allowing it to trap you or define you, but it only being able to be that way once you allow yourself to accept what it's done for you and how it's affected you.
I can definitely see why your song performed well, it really excels in simplicity but conveys its meaning really well. Whew, talent.
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Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 57,339
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Quote:
Originally posted by UFO
In My Head
Knock, knock, knock
Footsteps echo the pulse between my lungs
Frozen in madness, what have I become?
No one wants to fill the hole in my heart
I travel in the dark
At the end of the tunnel I can see
A mirage of flowers waiting for me
I run before I wake up from this dream
Knock, knock, knock
It's all in my head
Or at least that's what they want me to believe
I can't imagine
How you're nothing but a figment in my head
I thought that time had caught up to me
I thought this time I'm finally free
Cause you're in my head
Pure happiness I always wanted
I turn away, I lose foresight
To the warriors of the night
Nobody hears my inner cries
Forced on a roller coaster ride
But it's in my head
All of the memories that I created
They were never real
Now I got nothing but nothing in my head
Knock, knock, knock
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Combined with your K-pop avi, the "knock, knock, knock" has me imagining it as a K-pop hook in my head. 
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