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Tournament: PLATINUM HIT 8
Member Since: 8/6/2015
Posts: 18,803
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Quote:
Originally posted by ceremonials
Bitch it's definitely a possibility for me. I hope not...
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Bitch, there is absolutely no way you're not in the Top 10.  I've seen some of your stuff and it's
Also I see you Sam.
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 43,104
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Quote:
Originally posted by ceremonials
Do you have jumper cables? 
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Nope 
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Member Since: 4/4/2014
Posts: 10,514
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Let me post my song before the other three judges drag me, too.
Starcrossed
Concept: a remote village
Key word: zendik - A heretic or unbeliever, or one who practices heretical magic
[Verse 1]
They draw near with their pitchforks and fear
Their torches, stones and intentions are clear
Here they hunt at religion's command
We fall prey to what they don't understand
Will you burn with me, alive and free?
Will you come with me to where eyes can't see?
Will you hold my hand in one last flight?
Will you wait for me on the other side?
[Chorus]
We're witches, zendiks, false lovers and heretics
And nothing we say will convince them otherwise
Pull me close, don't say goodbye
Hold me tight, we'll never die
[Verse 2]
You loved the view from the mountain peak
Mornings in nature, the village asleep
I loved the trees and our daylight trysts
Nothing mattered but the warmth of our kiss
You whispered to me that we weren't wrong
People would hate, but with you, I belonged
You laughed through jeers with your smile and charm
With you, I never felt further from harm
[Chorus]
We're witches, zendiks, false lovers and heretics
And nothing we say will convince them otherwise
Pull me close, don't say goodbye
Hold me tight, we'll never die
[Bridge]
Perhaps ours is not to reason why
Our stars were crossed, we were fated to die.
But soon, we'll find each other again
Two souls in a village by the mountain
[Chorus]
We're witches, zendiks, false lovers and heretics
And nothing we say will convince them otherwise
Pull me close, don't say goodbye
Hold me tight, we'll never die
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Member Since: 4/4/2014
Posts: 10,514
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Quote:
Originally posted by ClarksonSlays
Nope 
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I'm sorry. Does your insurance company have a roadside assistance number?
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 43,104
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Quote:
Originally posted by Moonchild
I'm sorry. Does your insurance company have a roadside assistance number?
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I have no idea. My stepdad said he's gonna do some research tomorrow to help me out, the car is in his name and he has all the info so my hands are kinda tied. It's just such a ****** situation 
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Member Since: 4/4/2014
Posts: 10,514
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Quote:
Originally posted by ClarksonSlays
I have no idea. My stepdad said he's gonna do some research tomorrow to help me out, the car is in his name and he has all the info so my hands are kinda tied. It's just such a ****** situation 
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Catch a ride home or order an Uber. I'm sorry that happened. That sucks. 
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 43,104
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Quote:
Originally posted by Moonchild
Catch a ride home or order an Uber. I'm sorry that happened. That sucks. 
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I got home with Uber, I just don't know what to do with my car tomorrow  My stepdad better pull through!
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Member Since: 1/2/2014
Posts: 2,955
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This is my song, it's called We're Only Beautiful
Were Only Beautiful
We were a steady stream
But that never seemed to work
Cascading endlessly
To the point of no return
There’s no point in tranquil
If it just isn’t us
We’re on another level
In the hands of the vafrous
Drowning in a rage
Outpour of emotion
Tiny little waves
Without you I was golden
Longing for the days
Where we were just flowing
Where we were just flowing
Without falling, but baby
We’re only beautiful, oh when we fall
When we’re soaring off the edge
We’re only beautiful, oh when we fall
When we plummet to the end
Leave ‘em all in awe, their jaws on the floor
We’re a wonder of the world
We’re only beautiful, oh when we fall
When we’re soaring off the edge
We deafen like thunder
Yet they come by the masses
We’re some kind of wonder
A downstream of passion
Drowning in a rage
Outpour of emotion
Tiny little waves
Without you I was golden
Longing for the days
Where we were just flowing
Where we were just flowing
Without falling, but baby
We’re only beautiful, oh when we fall
When we’re soaring off the edge
We’re only beautiful, oh when we fall
When we plummet to the end
Leave ‘em all in awe, their jaws on the floor
We’re a wonder of the world
We’re only beautiful, oh when we fall
When we’re soaring off the edge
The beauty of Niagara, isn’t just the river
It’s the drastic drop of lovers
At the force of gravity, taking control of me
As we’re pushed down to each other
Drowning in a rage
Outpour of emotion
Tiny little waves
Without you I was golden
Longing for the days
Where we were just flowing
Where we were just flowing
Without falling, but baby
We’re only beautiful, oh when we fall
When we’re soaring off the edge
We’re only beautiful, oh when we fall
When we plummet to the end
Leave ‘em all in awe, their jaws on the floor
We’re a wonder of the world
We’re only beautiful, oh when we fall
When we’re soaring off the edge
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 31,895
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I never post my songs publicly, but I wanted to share this one because I know there were a lot of reactions to the difficulty of my theme/word. I figure someone might be interested in seeing how I tackled it.
Float Away
"Float Away"
Verse
Just another victim who was taken by time
A shell of who you once were, on these playground slides
The wind rips through you, and tears you apart
Tugs your heartstrings, and impales like darts
Chorus
You hold your red balloon in hand with a smile upon your face
But the tears behind your visage will surely take its place
The colors all turn shades of grey, your innocence begins to fade
Can't hold on no more...Can't hold on no more
You'll let it float away...
Verse
Just a withered shadow who was robbed of its light
Thoughts once full of cotton candy, now give up their fight
Irrelevant as paragoges, your happiness screams
I'm sorry that the world has taken away all your dreams
Chorus
You hold your red balloon in hand with a smile upon your face
But the tears behind your visage will surely take its place
The colors all turn shades of grey, your innocence begins to fade
Can't hold on no more...Can't hold on no more
You'll let it float away...
Bridge
Hold on tight, hold on tight...
But the wind is pulling hard
Held on tight, Held on tight...
But the wind just pulled too hard
Chorus
You held your red balloon in hand with a smile upon your face
But the tears behind your visage have now taken its place
The colors all turned shades of grey, your innocence, it's gone today
Can't hold on no more...
Couldn't hold on anymore...
You let it float away...
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 4/3/2014
Posts: 18,319
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Here is Gasoline fatties
Gasoline
Your love was but a vineyard
Wilting away with time
You'd made it through the winter
And aged into red wine
And my love was a thunderstorm
In its strength and its capacity
I felt the constellations form
And the lightning was still crackling
But somehow through the storm
All through the darkest melodies
Set in motion was the war
Foretold upon the kelebe
And so I light a match
To Let go of all the spite
And set fire to the past
That cold October night
Inside these gates, the
Ashes of what use to be
Sheltered in somber smoke
And tainted with gasoline
I walked through the remains
In solace and then in silence
A sudden drop of rain
Cast away all my defiance
And as tides began to turn
I felt the world move around me
Knew that if I was to burn
I would no longer be drowning
And so i lit another
This one, just for me
I cried out for my mother
And drenched myself in gasoline
And so I light a match
To Let go of all the spite
And set fire to the past
That cold October night
Inside these gates, the
Ashes of what use to be
Sheltered in somber smoke
And tainted with gasoline
The garden of the forlorn
And an orchard left to ashes
A vineyard full of thorns
A man on the brink of madness
The garden of forlorn
An orchard left to ashes
A vineyard full of thorns
A man on the brink of madness
And so I light a match
To Let go of all the spite
And set fire to the past
That cold October night
Inside these gates, the
Ashes of what use to be
Sheltered in somber smoke
And tainted with gasoline
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 43,104
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low key don't like my song this week so it's staying in my google doc, lucky y'all!
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Member Since: 9/12/2012
Posts: 26,389
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Quote:
Originally posted by ClarksonSlays
low key don't like my song this week so it's staying in my google doc, lucky y'all!
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Oh that explains a lot...
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 37,384
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dylobs
Thank you  But could you explain the bolded part cause I'm not quite sure what you mean?
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The next line should explain it. When you use bigger words as your rhyming words it can make the lines more clunky and seem less precise. It's not something you can't do, you just have to be extra cautious
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Member Since: 1/2/2014
Posts: 2,955
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Get the feeling that because I got great reviews from Gotskill then I'm gonna get dragged by Huga 
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Member Since: 1/2/2014
Posts: 2,955
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My collapse tag isn't working above :/ so strange
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 4/3/2014
Posts: 18,319
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Quote:
Originally posted by ausdaniel
My collapse tag isn't working above :/ so strange
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Try taking the apostrophe out
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Member Since: 1/2/2014
Posts: 2,955
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Quote:
Originally posted by ceremonials
Try taking the apostrophe out
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Ohhh that fixed it  Thanks!
I just thought the judges were spelling my song title without the apostrophe because they weren't great with grammar....haha
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Member Since: 4/4/2014
Posts: 10,514
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Sam (or Huga), could you post Huga's comments, please? 
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 4/3/2014
Posts: 18,319
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Quote:
Originally posted by ausdaniel
Ohhh that fixed it  Thanks!
I just thought the judges were spelling my song title without the apostrophe because they weren't great with grammar....haha
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I don't get why we can use periods but not apostrophes 
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Member Since: 8/6/2015
Posts: 18,803
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Quote:
Originally posted by GotSkill
The next line should explain it. When you use bigger words as your rhyming words it can make the lines more clunky and seem less precise. It's not something you can't do, you just have to be extra cautious
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Oh okay. So you're basically saying I put them in a lot and most of the time they worked but there were some instances where it was really iffy so I should try and use simpler words? Okay. I think I can deal with that 
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