Take Me Home is 1Dful
NOW here’s the thing. I’m a 32-year-old man who likes good old-fashioned rock ’n’ roll.
But, sadly, hardly any of the bands I like can sell two million albums to teenagers any more.
So ONE DIRECTION have earned almost the entire day in Bizarre page about their new album — and this is why…
They are THE biggest band from this country for years and this is a WORLD EXCLUSIVE first review of new album Take Me Home. It is a nailed-on chart topper around the planet.
The lads have already conquered America, can’t walk down the street without being mobbed and have more money than all the 18-year-olds in Scotland combined.
The album sounds almost identical to the last one but kids will love it — and some of the writers are talented folk.
It’s great news for big Brit stars like ED SHEERAN — who misses out on a few quid by being the most illegally downloaded artist in the world.
But his country estate isn’t far off — two of his songs are the best on the album.
HARRY, LOUIS, ZAYN, LIAM and NIALL are also great lads and proper pop stars in my opinion — so good luck to ’em.
They have also turned in the new record with help from McFLY and some of the best pop producers around.
And they haven’t veered far from the anthemic pop template that pleased millions of teenage girls on their debut.
The album has already landed the No1 spot on the pre-order charts in 50 countries — so huge sales are guaranteed on the November 12 release date.
I’ve handed over the reviewing duties to a man closer to the pop world — in both age and taste — than I am.
Here is Bizarre writer TOM THOROGOOD’s review…
1. Live While We’re Young
Recent single. The intro still sounds like THE CLASH’s Should I Stay Or Should I Go.
2. Kiss You
Fast-paced and McFly-alike. Could be a future single.
3. Little Things
Ed Sheeran’s penned the lads a grown-up folk song to release as their second single from Take Me Home. Fits right in among recent hits by Ed, BEN HOWARD and MUMFORD & SONS
4. C’mon C’mon
The most dancey song on the album. Harry’s vocals stand out. Similar to Up All Night from their first record.
5. Last First Kiss
The guitars on this mid-tempo track almost sound like OASIS’s Wonderwall.
6. Heart Attack
Of the all-out pop songs on here, this is the best. The punchy chorus and MICHAEL JACKSON-style “Owww” yelps from the lads make it catchy. From one of the producers behind TAYLOR SWIFT’s recent single We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together.
7. Rock Me
The title’s deceptive. This is hardly a full-on guitars number but it does recycle the handclap beat from QUEEN’s We Will Rock You. Produced by KATY PERRY svengali DR. LUKE.
8. Change My Mind
Too soppy. Skip.
9. I Would
TOM FLETCHER penned I Want for their debut. Now he’s teamed with McFly bandmates DANNY JONES and DOUGIE POYNTER to give One Direction a sequel. Decent.
10. Over Again
A second Ed Sheeran song. A ballad lent credibility and decent lyrics by the ginger star. Harry, Niall, Liam, Zayn and Louis sound more comfortable than ever singing this.
11. Back For You
Stomping pop, but a bit obvious.
12. They Don’t Know About Us
Filler.
13. Summer Love
Anthemic closer to the album — not a new version of a song from Grease but the kind of soft-rock anthem most bands would kill for.
