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Discussion: Gays: Do you believe in monogamy?
Member Since: 5/22/2011
Posts: 21,227
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Quote:
Originally posted by Vato
Can't you just have sex with your partner? An open relationship implies your partner isn't satisfying you in some aspect, whether it's sexual or otherwise, hence you shouldn't be in a relationship with them to begin with.
But that's just my opinion and I'm not judging mija. You do you  |
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Banned
Member Since: 6/25/2011
Posts: 37,192
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Quote:
Originally posted by Ressti
You can't do that with your boyfriend? I'm not trying to be rude or anything, but... I don't understand open relationships is all. It's not like cheating, where there's an obvious problem in the relationship and you go outside to look for something more exciting and thrilling... or is it?
Maybe it means the person you're with doesn't truly satisfy you.
Or is it about conquest?
BTW, I have nothing against people who prefer open relationships. If you like it, I love it.
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It's basically this.
Think of how many people are not satisfied with the sex in their marriages/relationships. Think about how many damn episodes of the Dr. Phil show or whatever have been based on this. People in open relationships acknowledge this and let the needs be met elsewhere, while maintaining the emotional bond with their primary partner.
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Member Since: 5/22/2011
Posts: 21,227
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dream
And what's wrong with being a ****? Do you think that being a **** makes you a bad person?
****-shaming is not a cute look.
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There's nothing good about hopping dick to dick either.
Doesn't make you a bad person but if you need to invite someone into a relationship because of sex only that doesn't make you a good person. 
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Member Since: 5/7/2012
Posts: 41,067
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I'm bisexual but also very monogamous, if I'm in a relationship with somebody then I want to give my all to them and I expect them to do the same to me, there's no room for other people otherwise I wouldn't be in a relationship in the first place. Which is why I find it funny when people stereotype bisexual people as being ****s or cheaters 
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Member Since: 8/30/2012
Posts: 5,537
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Quote:
Originally posted by Ressti
You can't do that with your boyfriend? I'm not trying to be rude or anything, but... I don't understand open relationships is all. It's not like cheating, where there's an obvious problem in the relationship and you go outside to look for something more exciting and thrilling... or is it?
Maybe it means the person you're with doesn't truly satisfy you.
Or is it about conquest?
BTW, I have nothing against people who prefer open relationships. If you like it, I love it.
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It's more about sexual curiosity all the while maintaining a certain stability thanks to a relationship.
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Banned
Member Since: 6/25/2011
Posts: 37,192
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mezik
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So you're saying I should break up with someone I love if the sex isn't exactly what I want?
Even if everything else about our relationship is great?
That seems a bit shallow.
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Member Since: 8/17/2013
Posts: 3,555
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Quote:
Originally posted by AuraOfPinkslam
No. I want my man to be honest about his urges and we can engage them TOGETHER.
Otherwise in this day and age you'll get cheated on blindly.
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+1.
If I'm in a relationship me and him are a team and we are going through life together, not with any other men. For me that's not selfish, more like automatic. I don't even get how this can be a 'thing'. People can do what they want as long as it doesn't affect them, but I don't think an open relationship can last for a very long time.
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Member Since: 8/18/2013
Posts: 21,558
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Quote:
Originally posted by J. YONCÉ
It's basically this.
Think of how many people are not satisfied with the sex in their marriages/relationships. Think about how many damn episodes of the Dr. Phil show or whatever have been based on this. People in open relationships acknowledge this and let the needs be met elsewhere, while maintaining the emotional bond with their primary partner. |
But, why don't you seek further for someone who you love AND can truly satisfy you?
Wouldn't that be much nicer?
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Member Since: 5/22/2011
Posts: 21,227
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Quote:
Originally posted by J. YONCÉ
So you're saying I should break up with someone I love if the sex isn't exactly what I want?
Even if everything else about our relationship is great?
That seems a bit shallow. |
No I'm saying I agree with his post 100%
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Banned
Member Since: 6/25/2011
Posts: 37,192
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Quote:
Originally posted by Aphrodite
+1.
If I'm in a relationship me and him are a team and we are going through life together, not with any other men. For me that's not selfish, more like automatic. I don't even get how this can be a 'thing'. People can do what they want as long as it doesn't affect them, but I don't think an open relationship can last for a very long time.
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Well, I know at least 5 couples personally who have been in open relationships for 20+ years.
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Member Since: 4/7/2012
Posts: 10,174
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Quote:
Originally posted by J. YONCÉ
So you're saying I should break up with someone I love if the sex isn't exactly what I want?
Even if everything else about our relationship is great?
That seems a bit shallow. |
I've been agreeing with all your posts BUT I do have to say, I don't think breaking up with someone because of the lack of good dick is a shallow reason. A healthy sex life between you and your partner is probably one of the most important parts of a relationship. If the sex isn't working out, then I don't see why it's shallow to end the relationship. Or maybe I'm just shallow lol.
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Banned
Member Since: 6/25/2011
Posts: 37,192
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Quote:
Originally posted by Cain
But, why don't you seek further for someone who you love AND can truly satisfy you?
Wouldn't that be much nicer?
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No?
If we both agree that an open relationship works for us, there is no problem at all. There is no conflict. You are assuming everyone in the world views monogamy/open relationships the same way you do. That's not true.
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Member Since: 10/10/2009
Posts: 10,662
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Quote:
Originally posted by Vato
Can't you just have sex with your partner? An open relationship implies your partner isn't satisfying you in some aspect, whether it's sexual or otherwise, hence you shouldn't be in a relationship with them to begin with.
But that's just my opinion and I'm not judging mija. You do you |
But that's not a fact, and is merely your assumption of others motives.
It's the same as saying "Having close friendships implies your romantic partner isn't satisfying you in some aspect".
Not everyone views sex in the same way. You can't assume that those who have a more "liberal" view are all unsatisfied in their relationships.
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Banned
Member Since: 6/25/2011
Posts: 37,192
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mezik
No I'm saying I agree with his post 100%
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I'm still not understanding why you're trying to tell other people whether they should or should not be in a relationship.
Unless they're trying to be in a relationship with you, it's not your business.
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 12/7/2011
Posts: 27,655
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Whatever floats their boats, I believe in the monogamy but who am I to judge someone.
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Banned
Member Since: 6/25/2011
Posts: 37,192
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dream
I've been agreeing with all your posts BUT I do have to say, I don't think breaking up with someone because of the lack of good dick is a shallow reason. A healthy sex life between you and your partner is probably one of the most important parts of a relationship. If the sex isn't working out, then I don't see why it's shallow to end the relationship. Or maybe I'm just shallow lol.
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That's definitely true. I mean more along the lines of having some kinks that your partner isn't willing to try, not being totally sexually incompatible.
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Member Since: 9/5/2011
Posts: 1,434
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Quote:
Originally posted by inspiration4
Honestly, people like YOU give the human race a terrible name.
Judging someone for something YOU have a personal problem with, despite the fact that said person's actions aren't hurting anyone, especially NOT YOU.
Live and let live. If you learn how to do the former, maybe the latter will eventually come.
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But it seems like some gays love flaunting the idea of "open relationships"! If you want to screw other guys while your boyfriend is at work the so be it. It's not cool and if you go out of your way to support it then I honestly feel really bad for you. Because obviously you haven't found someone to love you unconditionally.
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Member Since: 5/22/2011
Posts: 21,227
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Quote:
Originally posted by J. YONCÉ
I'm still not understanding why you're trying to tell other people whether they should or should not be in a relationship.
Unless they're trying to be in a relationship with you, it's not your business. |
I'm just agreeing with his post? 
In my mind an open relationship is wrong, and I don't believe in them. If someone wants to go sleep around, fine. But don't be in a relationship when doing so.
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Member Since: 7/9/2010
Posts: 31,471
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For the people saying no, what about other people? Do you care if they are involved in polygamy relationships?
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Banned
Member Since: 6/25/2011
Posts: 37,192
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mezik
I'm just agreeing with his post?
In my mind an open relationship is wrong, and I don't believe in them. If someone wants to go sleep around, fine. But don't be in a relationship when doing so. |
Again, why are you trying to tell other people what to do?
It's not your relationship. It's not your business. You don't get to tell other people what to do in their relationships, or whether they can enter a relationship or not.
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