As a very recent convert to Robynism I feel a bit like a poser including her in my countdown and pretending as though I have been supporting her throughout 2010. To be entirely truthful I was extremely skeptical of her music because I oppose anything of critical merit (as you might have guessed by some of my inclusions on this chart) and have fairly crappy taste, but dismissing Robyn as an over-praised hipster was such a horrible rush-to-judgment on my part. I soon realized I had to make room for all of the singles she released this year in my countdown. “Indestructible” is a delicious little gem of a song. The production is uncluttered and sophisticated sounding, yet beautifully layered with arpeggios, an interesting and lovely chord progression in the chorus and other lovely synthiness throughout. Robyn’s words and vocal performance in this song are emotive and perfectly convey her mixed bag of emotions; the hurt of past failed relationships going against the idea of never giving up on love and giving it all another shot. It’s a concept that probably any of us can relate to, yet in this song it somehow seems uniquely personal to Robyn.
The Best Bit: “And I never was smart with love. I let the bad ones in and the good ones go. But I’m gonna love you like I’ve never been hurt before. I’m gonna love you like I’m indestructible…”
24. Sky Ferreira One
Repetition is a beautiful thing and in 2010 it seemed to be everywhere in pop music. Whereas most of the songs mentioned in this list use repetition as a purely stylistic thing (which is usually amazing, so no complaints), I can’t help but feel like it serves a more practical purpose in the #24 entry on this countdown, Sky Ferreira’s “One”. You see, Sky’s not a robot, but she feels like one one one one one… and just as a robot might be programmed to say one word in a repetitious fashion, here Sky confesses to feeling like a robot in a relationship; going through preprogrammed motions over and over and over again in any attempt to make things work. I don’t know if acting like a robot will save the relationship, but it certainly works for this song. The ever-classy Bloodyshy & Avant whip up a lovely 80s inspired production complete with all the bleeps blips and bloops you could ever want. It’s perfect on every level. I wish I had put it higher in the countdown.
The Best Bit:One one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one…
23. Alexandra Burke Broken Heels Nicole Scherzinger Poison
Forget “Single Ladies” and all other songs of female empowerment, “Broken Heels” is the track that makes me want to burn my bra and pop my ***** in an act of celebrating my female power and sexuality. When I listen to this song I become a female; my dick shrivels up and falls off, I grow breasts and a pair of broken heels magically appear on my feet. Sadly, I was undergoing one such transformation one day while blasting this on my car stereo, and being so distracted by the biological impossibility happening before me I totally crashed into another car. It was sort of traumatic and I haven’t really been able to enjoy this song as much since then. Would this have charted higher had this event not happened? Quite possibly.
The Best Bit:Heeey-eeey-eey!
Two songs in the #23 position? What the **** is this? I planning my list I completely overlooked certain songs, and while I managed to catch most of them before the countdown progressed too far and I was able to bump certain songs out of the top 50 in order to include others, by the time I realized I had forgotten to include Nicole Scherzinger’s masterpiece “Poison” I was in counting down in the 30s. It simply would have been too much work to go back and remove a song from the top 50 or bubbling under in order to include Nicole, luckily I wrote to Alexandra Burke and she said she would not mind sharing her spot at #23 with her fellow relying-on-RedOne-for-that-hit pop star. Phew! But seriously, ya’ll, “Poison” is way better than any of you stupid hoes will ever admit cause you’re too concerned about maintaining your eCred by jumping on the ha-ha-ha-what-a-flop-her-music-must-suck bandwagon. And that’s the honest truth, and you know it. Maybe I’m in no position to preach, I throw my fair share of shade in Nicole’s direction and I criticized this song on the first listen, but it’s a grower. I gave it a chance, and so should you. So here’s the break down; Nicole’s singing style annoys the **** out of me, but I’m honest enough to admit to liking a song when it deserves to be liked, and “Poison” deserves to be liked. It’s perfectly produced, the chorus is catchy as ****, and I would absolutely sing its praises had it been released by anyone else (and you would too), so I might as well praise Nicole just a bit, right? RIGHT.
The Best Bit: There are so many “best” bits. For one, the chorus is amazing and fun to sing. It’s also amazing during the “So sick, get a grip, gonna stick to a stick, I don’t think that I can stop this, pick it up, let it drop, be my cup, sip it up. Oh no, I’ll never stop…” bit. It sounds great from 2:34 to 2:47, but the most amazing bit stretches from 2:48 through 3:09 when the whole thing drops out and slowly rises back up through a low-pass filter. ****ing. Perfect.
Repetition is a beautiful thing and in 2010 it seemed to be everywhere in pop music. Whereas most of the songs mentioned in this list use repetition as a purely stylistic thing (which is usually amazing, so no complaints), I can’t help but feel like it serves a more practical purpose in the #24 entry on this countdown, Sky Ferreira’s “One”. You see, Sky’s not a robot, but she feels like one one one one one… and just as a robot might be programmed to say one word in a repetitious fashion, here Sky confesses to feeling like a robot in a relationship; going through preprogrammed motions over and over and over again in any attempt to make things work. I don’t know if acting like a robot will save the relationship, but it certainly works for this song. The ever-classy Bloodyshy & Avant whip up a lovely 80s inspired production complete with all the bleeps blips and bloops you could ever want. It’s perfect on every level. I wish I had put it higher in the countdown.
The Best Bit: One one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one…
I love this song so much, it's my third most played on iTunes. I was so upset to find out that her debut album got pushed back to an unknown date (probably because Obsession failed to take off). Her label better treat her right.
I love this song so much, it's my third most played on iTunes. I was so upset to find out that her debut album got pushed back to an unknown date (probably because Obsession failed to take off). Her label better treat her right.
I'm sad to hear that. "One" is perfect, I really should have placed it higher. And the same for "Obsession" and "17" (which wasn't even on my bubbling under) which have really grown on me in just the last week or so.
If they're pushing her album back I'm afraid they plan on making her more generic or will forget about her completely.
Patrick, seeing you convert to Robynism has truly been one of the greatest things I've witnessed on ATRL in twenty-ten. It makes me want to post at least three teary Oprah gifs.
Patrick, seeing you convert to Robynism has truly been one of the greatest things I've witnessed on ATRL in twenty-ten. It makes me want to post at least three teary Oprah gifs.
I only wish I had done so sooner. I really want to include the other two singles in my top 20, but I already submitted my list to you and I suppose it wouldn't be an accurate representation of what I listened to for most of 2010. But there are many years practicing devout Robynism ahead of me.
Robyn makes her second appearance on this countdown with her fantastic single, “Hang With Me”, a bittersweet number with some pristinely beautiful vocals and truly intoxicating production work. I’ve noticed a fair number of people complaining that Robyn stole this gem because the song was in fact recorded a few years back by some irrelevant creature who was married to the track’s producer Klaus Ahlund, but I won’t stand for it. Robyn’s emotional interpretation of this track is so ridiculously accurate and through her delivery the song seems as personal as anything she could have written herself. At the end of the day the performance overpowers all, and there’s enough of a link between the sentimental and somewhat heartbreaking subject matter of this song and the other singles that have resulted from the Body Talk era that I think in conjunction they all sort of play off of each other as a beautiful and thematic opus of Robyn’s emotions.
The Best Bit: What part of this song isn’t a best bit? Robyn’s voice in the chorus; beautifully clean and absolutely enchanting. Ahlund’s beautiful arpeggiated synth melodies. Everything from 2:24-2:37 is perfect. The “We can doooo whatever” bit is amazing. Her riffing above the final chorus is so completely pleasant and beautifully executed.
21. Robyn Dancing On My Own
I think of “Dancing On My Own” as the most melancholic of the Body Talk era singles, yet it never stumbles into the overblown and flowery territory that most pop songs of a similar nature reside in. The message is precise and to the point, the language is simplistic, Robyn’s not drawing fluffy metaphors about seasons changing and lost love, and therefore “Dancing On My Own” feels inherently honest and is able to elicit an emotional response that the big ballads just never could. With a message as upfront as this one, is there anyone who could listen to this song and say they don’t relate in some way? I honestly don’t think there is. I’m not generally such a connoisseur of lyrics that I’m emotionally stirred by very many, if any, of the songs I hear, but it’s a different story with “Dancing On My Own”. As I listen to it now, I find myself confronting my fears that eventually the people I have loved will move on and leave me dancing on my own, and it only tightens the recent bond I have made with this track.
The Best Bit: Every second of it.
20. Taio Cruz Dynamite
Enough of all that emotional **** with the Robyn songs, I came to dance-dance-dance-dance, hit the floor, wear my favorite brands-brands-brands-brands and put my hands in the air. Taio Cruz’s “Dynamite” is pop genericism at its finest. The song is completely devoid of anything that could link it to Mr. Cruz himself, and that’s partially why I like it. This could have been a hit for Usher, Jesse McCartney, your fifth cousin or Wayne Newton. It’s just good old fashioned anonymous light hearted pop music, and with Dr. Luke’s sound dripping from every pore and orifice I sort of think of this song as the embodiment of pop music in 2010. With that in mind, I should need no other excuse to honor this very 2010 song in my countdown of the best singles of 2010. There’s nothing that hasn’t been explored 5,000 times before, but occasionally that’s just what pop music needs. I firmly believe that pop music should be fun, low-brow, stupid **** at least 86% of the time, while 7% of pop music should take the form of weepy balladry from Debbie Downers like Leona Lewis, and the remaining 7% of pop music should be come from the so-called artists who take it all a bit too seriously but still make somewhat enjoyable music.
The Best Bit:I’m gonna take it all, I, I’m gonna be the last one standing. Higher overall, I, I’m gonna be the last one landing. Cause I-e-I-e-I believe it, and I-e-I-e-I, I just want it all, I just want it all. I’m gonna put my hands in the air, Ha-hands in the air, put your hands in the air-air-air-air-a-a-a-a-a-a-a *cue melody and bring chorus back in*
I would like for all of my days to begin like Willow Smith’s “Whip My Hair”. I want to wake up every morning throw my covers off, hurl myself out of bed and sing hop up out the bed turn my swag on. I just have this really amazing visual about how that would probably look and I think it’d be amazing. Speaking of things that are amazing, “Whip My Hair” is pretty ****ing amazing, don’t cha think? This girl is just barely out of pampers and yet she’s releasing music that rivals Rihanna’s finest work and absolutely trumps anything Beyonce has ever done (a lesser accomplishment, really). The production value alone is surprisingly rich and satisfying considering the fact that most of her peers (are there even other kids in the music business that are young enough to be considered her peers?) would have been saddled up with some craptacular in-house Disney production team that would undoubtedly churn out a wimpy little number perfectly targeted at Chef Boyardee loving 6 year olds. Not the case with Willow, whose name might as well be synonymous with class and refinement. It seems humanly impossible for a 9 year old to **** so effortlessly which leads me to believe Willow is actually an alien. Given the fact that Will and Jada have been drinking a bit too much of the Travolta and Cruise Scientologist Kool Aid and Will’s involvement with all things extraterrestrials (Men in Black and Independence Day? It’s too much!) I think it’s entirely plausible that Willow is very in touch with her thetan self and is quite possibly the direct descendant of the almighty Xenu, or Xenu himself.
The Best Bit: “Just whip it. Whip it real good.” I’m here for the Devo reference.
18. Lady Gaga Telephone (unnecessarily feat. Beyonce)
If someone were to make a list of the greatest songs ever recorded about phones featuring both Lady Gaga and Beyonce as performers, one of their songs would land at #1 and the other would come in at about #92 as they would forego position 2 through 91 in order to award it a ranking that truly reflects the lameness of said song. Seeing as how I have amazing taste, the #1 song on that list has managed to also find a place on my list of 2010’s best singles. “Telephone” is really a delightful little number, but I’ve always been a bit perplexed by the feature, it’s just unnecessary, and I would find it completely unnecessary regardless of whether it were to feature Beyonce, Alexander McQueen, Giorgio Armani, David Bowie, Grace Jones, Roisin Murphy or God herself (Britney). I don’t like the fact that the flow of the song is interrupted to introduce an entirely new beat and allow Beyonce to spit out a few words in an overly deliberate manner that I find just sort of annoying. So yeah, when I ignore that aspect of it, “Telephone” seems downright amazing and I’m happy to award it the #18 spot on my countdown.
The Best Bit:Eh-eh-eh-eh-eh-eh-eh-eh-eh-eh-eh
17. Mike Posner Please Don't Go
Mike has a tendency to sing in this little baby voice, which given my affections for baby-voiced singers like Britney and Kylie I should probably love, but in Mike’s case it comes across as somewhat creepy, maybe just because it’s coming from someone with facial hair. That said, there’s something really enchanting about this song that allows me to overlook the fact that when I listen to this song I picture Mike’s huge head attached to an infant’s body and he’s begging some poor girl not to leave his pampers wearing ass. The production is really fantastic, and I think that’s ultimately why I love this track so much. It has all the necessary elements of a Benny Blanco hit, yet I hear a lot of influences from dub step and some dreamy qualities that almost seem to borrow from trance music. It’s really a lush and lovely song to listen to. BTW: Don’t change the station when this comes on the radio. As awesome as it sounds on your iPod, it sounds 12 times better with a little radio fuzz thrown into the mix.
The Best Bit: The Bridge is amazing, especially when the bass kicks into dubstep overdrive and later on when Mike does his falsetto thing on the last “from tomorrow”.
I love this song so much, it's my third most played on iTunes. I was so upset to find out that her debut album got pushed back to an unknown date (probably because Obsession failed to take off). Her label better treat her right. 
LOVE this song & such a great video
