Bloomers Best Of 2015: Complete. Thank you! - Page 34

Luigi

ooh, i like 10 bands

Green

Hymn For The Weekend

Bloomers

Replies - The Blackest Day stays being the worst on Honeymoon

Bloomers

________________________________

26. Ciara - Jackie

Ciara goes pop! That should have been the official narrative behind Jackie, which was unfortunately one of the bigger bombs of the year. Jackie is an imperfect album (mostly due to its sequencing), that's for sure, but it is still a very good one and did deserve so much better treatment than what it got. If only Ci had come out like Taylor and announced she was playing with her sound and making a pop album, I feel like her urban audience might not have been as turned off. Oh well.

The album is dedicated to and named after Ciara's mother, and the album seems to have a loose concept centered around the things that helped shape Ciara as she is today. There's songs about break-ups, children, dancing like you're making love, everything really. The album isn't exactly the most current sounding album: the Missy Elliott and Pitbull featuring [I]That's How I'm Feeling and Fly definitely do not sound of 2015, but I don't really think that makes it sound dated. Instead, I prefer the near throwback feel of the album. I mean, this is a year in which Meghan Trainor milked doo-wop for all it was worth, why put Ci on blast for a couple songs that sound like they could have been on the radio during the Goodies era?

Anyway, Jackie ended up being one of my most played albums of the year thanks to the 1-2 punch of singles I Bet and the sparkling Dance Like We're Making Love, the most criminally underrated single and music video of the year. The album isn't the flashiest album of the year, but it is a very solid pop album delivered with the charisma and coolness of a pro.

__________________________________________________ _______

25. Ecstatic Vision - Sonic Praise

I forget how I got into this album. I think I saw the cover on Pitchfork or Allmusic and thought I would give it a try. I'm glad I did. This metal album hits all the best spots.

It's a metal album, but not overly loud or confrontational. It rocks hard

but not too loud. The sound of the whole thing kind of makes me want to get a motorcycle and go cruising through the alkaline salt flats. It's lightly psychedelic throughout, and has a certain groove that can be downright catchy at times, especially on the poppier cuts like Astral Plane, pt. 2 and Don't Kill The Vibe. The whole album whips by quickly, never overstaying its welcome. I can't praise the sonics enough highly recommended listening for rock fans.

__________________________________________________ _______

24. Brandon Flowers - The Desired Effect

Brandon Flowers already conquered rock music with The Killers and seems to be gunning for the King of Pop title. He makes a very convincing bid for the throne on this album. There are some incredible songs on the Desired Effect. He worked with pretty much all the trendy producers to make a killer album. The songs can range from near euphoria to capturing a certain sense of romantic loneliness. It's always great though.

__________________________________________________ _______

23. HEALTH - DEATH MAGIC

I had been meaning to check out this group for some time, especially since I had heard a couple of their songs for the Max Payne soundtrack and loved their slow grind. I wasn't disappointed with DEATH MAGIC which I understand was their pop record. Their throbbing electronic sound on this album hits hard, but there are still some borderline sugary hooks that helps cut the attack of the music and keep you fully engaged.

__________________________________________________ _______

22. Leon Bridges - Coming Home

As I said in my write-up for Brown Skin Girl, Leon taps into that romanticized 50s styled music. His live shows look like they're fresh out a time capsule, or at least how you would imagine them to look, cleanly pressed, live instrumentation only, a line of backing singers accompanying him on stage. No frills, not much production, just classically styled pop music. Much of Coming Home sounds like the birth of rock an roll, and while it doesn't always pop completely, the music does sound very crisp and is always a pleasant listen even when the energy level could be slightly higher and electric.

Still, the album is a great listen, especially in how Leon manages to capture a specific style of music dead on and feel a part of it rather than a tribute act. I also find it very interesting that Leon Bridges released this album, an album with songs like Brown Skin Girl and the stunning The River which seems to reference the birth of rock music and lightly touch on the subject of race, in a year with so much ongoing racial dialogue and tension. It kind of serves as a simultaneous reminder and celebration of the impact of black musicians with regards to recorded music.

__________________________________________________ _______

21. Towkio - .wav Theory

This was just a mixtape, but it was an incredible mixtape. I was browsing through datpiff one day, saw the cover, liked it a lot, sampled a couple tracks, and gave it a download. I was not disappointed at all. The mixtape was one of the most adventurous and playful things I've heard all year. The mixtape fuses dance, rap, electronic music, R&B, and is more or less just one continuous party, hitting you with wave after wave of stuff to enjoy. There is also some cross over between this and the Donnie Trumpet & The Social Experiment as both Chance the Rapper and Donnie Trumpet show up. Simultaneously experimental and a party album, it's definitely worth a complete listen.

__________________________________________________ _______

Gabriel_Spears

Brandon

Ciara's music was kinda of OK... surprisingly

las3horas220

Brandon

~check out mine

Rider

Jackie

I don't know the others

Hymn For The Weekend is an anthem and I also enjoy 10 Bands (it won't be on my list tho

)

KillingYourCareer

All those better songs on Honeymoon and you choose HBTB? Bye, I hope there's better ahead

Topmaster 2

HEALTH, Brandon, Ecstatic Vision

and Ciara

Tom Vercetti

On a first listen I liked Jackie but then as time went it, it didn't really stick with me as much as her last album did. BMF/DLWML/All Good I still use though.

Sonic Praise sounds A-Okay.

You already know my opinion on The Desired Effect

Coming Home, I think I heard it a while ago & liked the throwback themes.

I'll have to listen to Towkoi's mixtape sometime later. Heavens Later

holocene

The way you feel about the Lakers is how I feel about the Knicks except for that I'm loyal to them because they're Joey/Chandler's fave team. I truly wish I was kidding.

~

How are you gonna call call The Holiest Day a boring song while stanning Honeymoon which is six minutes of nothing?

MP2K

Love the Jackie love and description.

You've got an eclectic taste, haven't heard some of these. Leon Bridges though, I've heard Coming Home (single) and it was really nice.

Calvin McHobbes

Looking through the last few updates, Im not familar with very much. However, the stuff I do like is stuff I like alot, so maybe youee onto something and I should check out the rest.

Bloomers

Replies

Bloomers

WORST

By nature I think that I'm a generally positive person, and I almost always focus on the good things in life and ignore the bad (or at least tolerate the bad things). That being said, there are just some things I that I don't like.

I debated whether or not to discuss those things this year, but decided why not, it's all in good fun.

Surprisingly, I didn't mind Madonna much this year. I still don't really like her, but unlike last year when she made my worst artist list despite releasing no new music officially, she really didn't feel overly obnoxious and was kind of entertaining this year.

I think I'll only keep it to music though and only to artists relevant enough to care about to mention.

________________________________

Miley Cyrus

I didn't just dislike one thing Miley Cyrus did this year. I disliked Miley in general. Yeah, she's almost the complete opposite of what I just criticized Selena Gomez for, but she was just as bad. She just has come across as completely fake and calculated since Bangerz, maybe before, I honestly didn't pay attention to her before then. People get older, let their hair down, and change which I totally get, but Miley's transformation comes across as a complete put-on, made to market her brand of zany it's just Miley being Miley® antics. She provokes and prods at good taste to get a reaction out of people and get the center of attention. She's literally the little kid at a family party that takes off all her clothes when she's being ignored and her increasingly over-the-top and predictable actions throughout the year just got exhausting.

Unlike say, Madonna, who (despite the fact that I am not a Madonna fan by any means) actually used her provocations to make some type of artistic or political statement in addition to putting the center of attention on her, there really isn't any substance to Miley's sideshow. She is a smart person and clearly knows exactly what she's doing, she'll make a mess of herself at the VMAs and then come back with the most attractive homeless person she can find to show them off and try and make some political statement to repair her public image so she can just come back and make a mess of herself again and will repeat the cycle. She's been very tiring and there's really no amount of dull Flaming Lips cover albums that will make up for her obnoxious trolling. Luckily, she's becoming easy to ignore.

__________________________________________________ _______

Macklemore - Downtown

Macklemore is probably my least favorite artist currently working today. The guy just comes across as incredibly full of himself and was clearly that kid in class that would rat out his classmates so he himself wouldn't get in trouble (see how he was quick to publish his text message between himself and Kendrick Lamar after Macklemore won Best Rap Grammy, complete with 1000+ unread texts!). His music is very boilerplate and bland outside his breakout Thrift Shop. He uses some quirky vocal hook and really doesn't have any interesting flow or technical skill.

Downtown is just a complete mess of a song. I am one that likes a hot mess, but this one is just all over the place to the point that it's a headache. You have Macklemore which is bad enough, but they you also have the guy from Foxy Shazam (

) and then, being the shrewd panderer he is, he must have heard the criticism that he isn't real rap, and seen the criticism that Iggy Azalea got and recruited some of rap's progenitors to make his song undraggable. It's all very narcissistic, but still pandering. He's just the worst and so is Downtown.

__________________________________________________ _______

Sam Smith - The Whining's On The Wall

I love the Bond themes. I have a compilation that I regularly listen to; they're cinematic and sweeping, and more often than not, accurately capture the movie they were made for and all just generally are fun songs to listen to: I mean, you have Live and Let Die, You Know My Name, Diamonds Are Forever, Goldfinger, Nobody Does It Better, Goldeneye, Skyfall, and The World Is Not Enough as Bond Themes. Then you have The Writing's On The Wall, which is by far the worst entry in the franchise.

It has the sweeping strings and epic production that is typical of themes, but Sam just does not have that fire to properly communicate the song, not to mention that his voice is just unpleasant to listen to sometimes. His voice can become high-pitched to the point that it's very whiny, and the song straddles the weird territory of being bot over dramatic and way too sleepy.

__________________________________________________ _______

David Guetta (feat. Nicki Minaj & ???) - Hey Mama

David Guetta clearly wants to coast, which is fine, sometimes you just want to hear the same old songs. The problem is that he keeps relying on the worst vocalists to provide his hooks. The ones with such grating vocals done in such cartoonish ways they just crawl in your head and get stuck there without any hope of leaving.

Hey Mama is noisy and you definitely have to be in a certain mood for it to hit right, and it can be good, Nicki especially delivers a charismatic performance and the song has a certain sense of bombast to it. The problem with this song for me is those shrill vocals by that unknown pop singer and just turn the song into a headache. They're nails on a chalkboard. I'd rather listen to nails on a chalkboard actually than those vocals.

__________________________________________________ _______

Sia - Alive

Speaking of nails on a chalkboard... Funny story, I don't like Sia. At all. I think her pop song writing relies on way too many cliched metaphors and similies and more often than not have some played out loud-quiet-loud dymanic. A Sia song is likely to have a one or two word title that features prominently in the song's chorus and serves as part of the song's central metaphor or concept.

"Like a double rainbow, we see eye to eye," "I put on my Perfume, I'm gonna mark my territory." "I'm Gonna Swinnnnngggg on a ChandeliEEEAAAARRRRRRR" "PreRRRRRrrrtTTTTea HuRRRRrrrrTTTTss" "Shine bright like a Diamond."

She's truly the worst, people act like she's some commercial force and deep songwriter when she turns in some of the most one note material. She's been successful because she's worked with some of the biggest hitmakers out there: Guetta, Flo Rida, Rihanna, and yet people act like the songs were successful due to Sia, instead of successful in spite of her.

Anyway, back to Alive. I avoided this song because... it's Sia. I had no idea what it sounded like. One night, I'm sitting in a restaurant with my friends, we're having a conversation and we're pretty deep into it. All of a sudden, I can't pay attention anymore. The song that came on the radio just seemed to be screaming. I look up at it confused and can't focus on the conversation anymore. We stop talking because there's a cat being murdered on the radio. I pull out my phone to find out what the song is so I know to never listen to it again, and it's Sia. Of course.

__________________________________________________ _______

Twenty One Pilots - Stressed Out (I guess)

Well. I thought I might be able to ignore these guys, but it looks like they're actually on their way to getting a hit so, I figured it's time to include them here. I tried listening to Blurryface, but couldn't get through it. These two come of as pretentious in the way that few artists do. They have all of Emimen's disaffection with the world, but none of his talent, nuance, personality, lyrical ability, wit, word play, relatability, complexities, etc, Instead of any of this, they rely on weird vocal hooks (what you do as a musician selling a song to be catchy, when you really don't have the talent to make a musically or lyrically interesting song) and nostalgic pandering. This song says, the world sucks, but not really in an interesting, creative, novel way. It has alright production I guess.

__________________________________________________ _______

Selena Gomez - Good For You

I do not think there was a song I genuinely hated on every level as much as this one. I just don't get Selena Gomez in general, she can't really sing, she can't really dance, she can't really write music, she can't really... well, I could fill this page with all the things she can't really do. She's basically as qualified to be a musician as you or me, and yet here she is. I don't mind an artist not being able to sing, write, or dance, as long as they are entertaining, but it's more than that. Selena Gomez doesn't even have the presence to be seen as bland and just there, she's a cipher, just vaguely bland and if Britney Spears (as much as I really like Britney and hate to compare artists) has writing credits on one of your albums and has delivered a single with more personality than you in 2015, something is seriously seriously wrong. I guess you could make the argument that Selena Gomez is just a vehicle for producers to deliver some of their songs and build up their resumes to be able to move on to bigger and better pop stars, but really, why not just release music under your own name?

None of the above really details why I really didn't like this song. I like pop music a lot, or else I wouldn't be here, and I don't mind a generic tune especially if it's entertaining or says something important or worthwhile, I'l defend a song like Fight Song to the death for example; Good for you does none of that stuff I just mentioned though. Selena Gomez delivers her lines with the intensity and liveliness of a Walking Dead extra, mumbling her way through the song, and sleepily staring at you through blank eyes throughout the video. It just feels so... gross

Obviously she's trying to be sexy and I understand that she feels the need to shed her Disney image by taking the easy way out by equating overt references to sexiness with maturity, which is one way to do it. Personally, I consider someone who is comfortable in their own skin and self-assured and capable of acting as their own person, mature; but ever person is different and I respect Selena's decisions here as unattractive as I may find them.

The lyrics are the worst part of the song and the part that makes my skin crawl. It's just so... superficial, equating herself to carats (actually putting value on herself), and just making herself up to be appealing to her love interest in the song. I understand that there is value and empowerment in taking control of your body to make yourself appealing to a love interest, but I just don't get that feeling from the song, she just seems solely determined to make herself up and even change her appearance to fit that of her partner. Maybe it's just because, like I said, I'm more attracted to people that aren't willing to change themselves to fit someone's else's idea of attraction, but this song, just felt deeply immature with the terrible message of equating self-worth with someone else's idea of looking good and and earning affection through that. Just a terrible song with a gross message for me, and that just all just soured her whole era for me. For the record, I think The Heart Wants What It Wants is her best song, vulnerable, introspective, it's mature in a way Good For You never would be.

__________________________________________________ _______

holyground

I'm not sure if I prefer AHFOD over Ghost Stories. I really LOVED the desperate sadness of GS, and it all culminated in this bittersweet emotional release with ASFOS. AHFOD fleshes out that emotion from ASFOS and is an amazing pop record that makes me so happy. So yeah, idk if I prefer being sad or happy.

Brandon my baby

BLOOMERS I hate you for this worst list.

Alive (which I guess I understand), Stressed Out, and GOOD FOR YOU?

Why Bloomers why

Vulnicura

DRAG Selena

totally how I feel about her, and to some extent Demi too. No stage presence, vocals are nothing to write about, no personality in her music that makes you go "oh, this is Selena Gomez". I totally think she got lucky with GFY despite the blatant attempt at trying to have a crossover hit by cooing over a minimal R&B song.

Era

I agree with almost all the drags! Even Hey Mama (one of my fav jams of the year) as you did mention Nicki slays on it (she's the only reason I love it as much as I do)

BUT
Good For You?

Should be on your Best Of list!

K$Ellie

Jackie has some good songs

Miley making your list

Her album/mixtape is tragic.
I like Alive and Good For You

Sam's song is

Downtown and Hey Mama are bad too

Era

BTW you forgot to remove the YouTube videos from the albums post in the Worst Of post