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Music News: Gigwise: 50 Worst Albums of the Decade
Member Since: 6/16/2010
Posts: 19,686
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Gigwise: 50 Worst Albums of the Decade
I don't know if this has been posted or if anyone will be interested but I found it hilarious.
I will just post the top 10 and some highlights from throughout, it's a really long list so just click if you wanna read the whole thing.
SOURCE: http://www.gigwise.com/article.php?i...ll#commentstop
49. Black Eyed Peas: 'The E.N.D' (2009) – We were hoping that this, BEPs' fifth full-length, would spell out the end for the group in more ways than one. Sadly, judging by their continued success, the record is likely to spark a new chart-conquering chapter in the band's life. It's still incredible to think that devoid of Fergie, Black Eyed Peas' first two albums back on the other side of the millennium were actually rather good.
36. Avril Lavigne: 'Let Go' (2002) - This debut album from the Canadian starlet sold 18 million copies worldwide so chances are someone you know has this in their collection – however, few could claim anything other than hormones for wanting to buy such a faux-angry album. The audio equivalent of a baby throwing its toys out of the pram, Avril caterwauls about boys and how unfair life is over a sub-Alanis Morrissette backing track for an agonising thirteen tracks. Luckily Avril's career has died a death in recent years to pave the way for fresh talent like Taylor Swift, Katy Perry and... Oh what's the point?
27. Jennifer Lopez: 'Rebirth' (2005) – Shifting just 2million copies worldwide - a gargantuan flop by J.Lo's standards – 'Rebirth' is largely a collaborative effort between the singer and her current husband Marc Anthony. Unsurprisingly due to its turgid quality, the record failed to produce the huge hits Lopez is accustomed to. Duly, after second single 'Hold You Down' seismically bombed , third single 'Cherry Pie' was hastily dropped by the record label.
26. Robbie Williams: 'Rudebox' (2006) - In which Robbie Williams, the 'Fat dancer from Stoke', decided to make an album that includes indie rock covers, production by Mark Ronson and worst of all – ****ING RAPPING! Robbie's skills on the mic are unlikely to keep Jay Z up at night as lines such as “Dance like you just won at the Special Olympics” and “Got no strings, but I think with my ding-a-ling” show. The album saw once successful Williams career take somewhat of a nosedive and whilst there is still interest in him amongst his hardcore following many believe 'Rudebox' to be the moment Robbie lost the majority of his fans. The album ends with a song called, 'Dickhead'. Very apt.
25. Lindsay Lohan: 'Speak' (2004) – If ever there was proof that LiLo needs to stick to the day job of acting in sugary, vacuous movies then it's 'Speak'. With tracks like 'First', the former Disney star tries to meld helium pop vocals with angsty guitars to abysmal effect. Tracks like 'Over' and 'Rumors' fare even worse. A record that's so bad, we even eagerly awaited the annoying advert breaks on Spotify as a breather while re-listening to it.
24. Mariah Carey: 'Charmbracelet' (2002) – The warbling diva surpassed even her lowly standards with this 2002 release. If any album on this countdown is intolerable enough to make you gnaw your knuckles hard enough to draw blood, then it's this musical nightmare. Worse still, acts like Jay-Z and Jadakiss soiled their names by co-writing and performing on tracks on the album.
21. Ashlee Simpson: 'I Am Me' (2005) Obviously a fan of stating the obvious, this 2005 album from sister of Jessica, Ashlee Simpson is a low point in manufactured pop rubbish. Despite the fact she had embarrassed herself the year before with a shocking lip-synching incident this album was still recorded and released to little or no fan fare. Simpson is now married to Fall Out Boy's Pete Wentz – I wonder if they ever compare their dodgy musical histories?
18. Jessica Simpson: 'Do You Know' (2008) - Jessica Simpson's fifth studio album was the singer's first to embrace her roots in country music – and what a terrible idea that turned out to be. It may have gone to number one, but, proving that they're sometimes right, the critics were united in their hatred for it. Unfortunately, however, not only did Simpson embrace country like a duck to an oil slick, but she also managed to tarnish to career of country legend Willie Nelson when she appeared in one of his videos in a bid to promote it.
12. Enrique Iglesias: 'Escape' (2001) - “You can be my hero baby,” squeals Enrique on 'Escape's' chart-topping ubiquitous single 'Hero' which shot to the top of the UK and global charts in 2001. High sales and milking your relationship with Tennis star Anna Kournikova by bunging her in one of your videos isn't enough to stop 'Escape' from taking its place on Gigwise's worst albums of the decade.
10. Vanilla Ice: 'Bi-Polar' (2001) - An album that's so bad it''s laughable. Seriously check it out and you'll piss yourself. Still trying desperately to live off the success of 'Ice Ice Baby', Mr Van Winkle put out a string of albums on his own imprint (after record labels refused to sign him) and this, 'Bi-Polar', is easily the worst of the bunch. One-half cliched rock music, the other lame rap, not even a guest slot from Chuck D was enough to save this from bargain bins.
9. Victoria Beckham: 'Victoria Beckham' (2001) - No it wasn't a bad dream, Victoria Beckham aka Posh Spice, aka vacuous fake-titted airhead, genuinely did release a solo album. Despite lacking the charisma, vocals or talent to actually be a force in music, Mrs David Beckham released this record. The only thing we can be grateful for is that she omitted the number two hit 'Out Of Your Mind' featuring Dane Bowers. If you ever feel like complaining about the quality of music at the moment then just thank your lucky stars it's no longer the year 2000.
8. The Cheeky Girls: 'Party Time' (2004) - A true low point in British pop music these two Transylvanian sisters first appeared on reality TV show Popstars: The Rivals where they did not make it beyond the first round. Even judge Geri Halliwell thought they were rubbish. This did not deter the band nor the major label vultures however and spying a chance to make a quick buck the Cheeky Girls were handed a record deal and went into the studio to record this dreadful album. Written by the girls Mother this album contains the now infamous 'Cheeky Song (Touch My Bum)'. Most staggeringly of all is that 'Party Time' reached number 14 in the album charts and sold over a million copies.
7. Paris Hilton: 'Paris' (2006) - In which Paris Hilton revealed her love of My Bloody Valentine and early Bob Dylan. OK, not really, this self titled album is in fact a horrendous, manufactured piece of pop diarrhoea that was forgotten almost as soon as it was released. Nobody knows the true horror of Paris's voice as it was hidden under a mountain of studio trickery which makes her come out sounding even more cold and dead than normal. No mean feat. The only good thing that came from this release was that it sprang Banksy into action. The guerilla artist replaced Hilton's CD with his own remixes and gave them titles such as 'Why Am I Famous?', 'What Have I Done?' and 'What Am I For?' He also changed pictures of her on the CD sleeve to show the US socialite topless and with a dog's head.
6. Chris Cornell: 'Scream' (2009) - So you were the lead singer in Soundgarden then went on to front a band consisting of ex-members of Rage Against The Machine - a pretty solid CV most people would agree. So why of why did Chris Cornell feel the need to record this dreadful album with Timbaland? The sound of two men who have fallen so far from their respective perches that they can only work together, 'Scream' is an auto-tuned painful mid-life crisis of an album that Nine Inch Nails' Trent Reznor hilariously mocked online.
5. Kevin Federline: 'Playing With Fire' (2006) - Apparently being married to Britney Spears is now an in to the music industry. K-Fed's 2006 album 'Playing With Fire' is widely regarded as the worst album of the decade with the lowest average mark on reviews aggregator Metacritic. Chances are, however, it is only the critics that have heard the album as it flopped in the States reaching the very low position of 151 in the charts.
4. brokeNCYDE: 'I'm Not A Fan... But The Kids Like It' (2009) – Easily the worst band to emerge this decade, the New Mexico crunk outfit are the aural equivalent of rubbing a cheese grater on your manhood. Or sandpaper even. Honestly, there are barely words in the dictionary to describe how horrible this record is. How any kids like these is truly beyond us.
3. Crazy Frog: 'Crazy Hits' (2005) - Now we at Gigwise don't often use the word '****', but it's truly the only word to suit this little green, animated urchin. Originally dubbed The Annoying Thing by its creators (The Annoying **** would have been more apt), the Crazy Frog was first used for mobile phone ringtones but indicative of how brain-dead the masses are he went on to spawn (ahem) a huge pop career. A collection of cover versions that's so bad, it could actually be used as a torture instrument.
2. The Jonas Brothers: 'A Little Bit Longer' (2008) - The world's citizens - well, those under the age of 13 - stopped in their tracks when The Jonas Brothers released 'A Little Bit Longer' in 2008 such was the anticipation for its release. Well, it's just a shame that the world didn't blow up as well, because that would have eradicated the possibility of further releases from these three self-confessed virgins, whose voices are so high-pitched they manage to make James Blunt sound like Barry White.
1. Katie Price & Peter Andre: 'A Whole New World' (2006) - The covers record by the attention-seeking, vacuous airhead Katie and Peter (we won't use such harsh words for Andre, he's actually a bloody nice bloke) is sheer musical genocide. Okay the ill-fated couple donated proceeds to charity, a very nice sentiment, but surely there's easier ways to raise funds that to inflict aural torture on the masses? Maybe even dig deep into their own pockets. Their soppy out-of-tune version of the title track is easily one of the worst songs ever recorded to boot.
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Member Since: 4/4/2010
Posts: 5,145
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Member Since: 1/4/2009
Posts: 11,404
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49. Black Eyed Peas: 'The E.N.D'
First 8 songs from this album are amazing, all the rest suck.
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Member Since: 6/16/2010
Posts: 19,686
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Quote:
Originally posted by WheresJay
They forgot Bionic
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That would be a different decade 
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Member Since: 6/3/2006
Posts: 51,724
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Fail List.
Paris, The E.N.D., Charmbracelet, Do You Know, I Am Me, Rebirth >>>> Those people entire life.
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Member Since: 5/6/2010
Posts: 35,158
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Member Since: 3/18/2008
Posts: 40,057
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Quote:
Originally posted by WheresJay
They forgot Bionic
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.
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Member Since: 10/8/2009
Posts: 35,527
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Quote:
Originally posted by WheresJay
They forgot Bionic
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Thank Me Later 
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Member Since: 9/3/2006
Posts: 27,884
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"Let Go", seriously?
They forgot Blackout too.
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Member Since: 10/8/2009
Posts: 35,527
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This list is a MESS 
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Member Since: 1/4/2009
Posts: 11,404
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Quote:
Originally posted by ρз∂гσ
>>>> Those people entire life.
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Wtf?
Edit: nevermind, didn't look at the username.
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Member Since: 6/17/2009
Posts: 3,311
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Quote:
36. Avril Lavigne: 'Let Go' (2002) - This debut album from the Canadian starlet sold 18 million copies worldwide so chances are someone you know has this in their collection – however, few could claim anything other than hormones for wanting to buy such a faux-angry album. The audio equivalent of a baby throwing its toys out of the pram, Avril caterwauls about boys and how unfair life is over a sub-Alanis Morrissette backing track for an agonising thirteen tracks. Luckily Avril's career has died a death in recent years to pave the way for fresh talent like Taylor Swift, Katy Perry and... Oh what's the point?
21. Ashlee Simpson: 'I Am Me' (2005) Obviously a fan of stating the obvious, this 2005 album from sister of Jessica, Ashlee Simpson is a low point in manufactured pop rubbish. Despite the fact she had embarrassed herself the year before with a shocking lip-synching incident this album was still recorded and released to little or no fan fare. Simpson is now married to Fall Out Boy's Pete Wentz – I wonder if they ever compare their dodgy musical histories?
7. Paris Hilton: 'Paris' (2006) - In which Paris Hilton revealed her love of My Bloody Valentine and early Bob Dylan. OK, not really, this self titled album is in fact a horrendous, manufactured piece of pop diarrhoea that was forgotten almost as soon as it was released. Nobody knows the true horror of Paris's voice as it was hidden under a mountain of studio trickery which makes her come out sounding even more cold and dead than normal. No mean feat. The only good thing that came from this release was that it sprang Banksy into action. The guerilla artist replaced Hilton's CD with his own remixes and gave them titles such as 'Why Am I Famous?', 'What Have I Done?' and 'What Am I For?' He also changed pictures of her on the CD sleeve to show the US socialite topless and with a dog's head.
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#FAIL#  these ones >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> [insert some random name of the albums in this list]
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Member Since: 10/5/2009
Posts: 137,162
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Mess list.
This list should be full of irrelevants.
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Member Since: 6/16/2010
Posts: 19,686
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Hey everyone who is making themselves look stupid.
The decade goes from 2000-2009, the 2000's
2010 is a different decade meaning any album released this year, should not be on this list. We are in the 2010's now 
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Member Since: 7/14/2009
Posts: 22,692
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Quote:
Originally posted by itstotallybea
6. Chris Cornell: 'Scream' (2009) - So you were the lead singer in Soundgarden then went on to front a band consisting of ex-members of Rage Against The Machine - a pretty solid CV most people would agree. So why of why did Chris Cornell feel the need to record this dreadful album with Timbaland? The sound of two men who have fallen so far from their respective perches that they can only work together, 'Scream' is an auto-tuned painful mid-life crisis of an album that Nine Inch Nails' Trent Reznor hilariously mocked online.
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I like Scream. 
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Member Since: 3/30/2009
Posts: 79,408
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Paris Hilton's debut album is actually one great pop album.
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Member Since: 6/16/2010
Posts: 19,686
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Quote:
Originally posted by remeese
Mess list.
This list should be full of irrelevants.
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If it was full of irrelevants no-one would give a damn.
I didn't write it anyways, just copied it because it was interesting.
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Member Since: 6/30/2007
Posts: 18,079
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Isn't this already posted? I remember that #1 album.
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Member Since: 6/16/2010
Posts: 19,686
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Quote:
Originally posted by Duca
Paris Hilton's debut album is actually one great pop album.
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I actually agree, bar 'Do Ya Think I'm Sexy' because her voice on that literally makes me feel sick.
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ATRL Senior Member
Member Since: 11/14/2008
Posts: 24,988
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Quote:
Originally posted by Rafael.
"Let Go", seriously?
They forgot Blackout too.
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Are you high or something? Blackout was one of the best albums released last decade. 
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