Relationship expert gworls, please help your sis! :(
Ok, sisters...
Last summer I was with a guy and we were having amazing time together. The best first date ever, so much chemistry, amazing first kiss, etc... we started dating and we were together for a couple of months, and everything was going right and perfect until one terrible night... a missunderstood and he's acting a bit of a jerk for not explaining that missunderstood cause a break up. I was devastated, and since I'm almost at the end of med college with not so much time, I had to move on quickly and put everything, emotions, feelings and him aside. We haven't heard from each other till New Years Eve. I texted. I wanted to see him so badly. He texted back, and the feelings were mutual. So, we met in like 3 am, hugged and kissed like everything is ok and I slept @ his place (no sex). We woke up, drank coffee, eat breakfast and then we talked. He said that he realised that he was a big mofo and a jerk and that he will understand if I can't forgive him. Also, he said that he wasn't aware what he lost until I was no longer there with him, he didnt text me cause he was sure I hate him and the only important thing is that we are now here together. I was like "Well, I do forgive you, for real, and yes you are a big douche, but I'm not sure If I can go on and continue where we stopped. Actually, I can but I'm not sure that I want." We spent another day and night together, watching movies, making dinner It was just like back then The day after, I went back to my home (different city, but like 30 miles away, and I have to go to the city where he lives almost every week cuz of the college anyway). Day after, I called him to check up on him and see what is he doing and stuff... now, 3 days later we haven't talked at all... no calls, no texts, no tweets, no facebook msgs, nothing.
I'm sitting here now, and thinking, and even tho I said to him that Im not sure do I really wanna be back with him... I really do. I miss him so much and I think I love him. I just can't describe the feeling.
The Ultimate Epic question, and the answer we always wanna know. Should I call him and tell him that? I miss him. I want to be with him.
Don't text him. Even if he replies and you hang out again you'll always wonder in the back of your mind if he even wants to be with you. And if he doesn't reply you're going to feel worse than you do now.
Honestly, he sounds like someone you need to get away from. I know that's easier said than done. Good luck
Don't text him. Even if he replies and you hang out again you'll always wonder in the back of your mind if he even wants to be with you. And if he doesn't reply you're going to feel worse than you do now.
Honestly, he sounds like someone you need to get away from. I know that's easier said than done. Good luck
That's the reason why I said that Im not sure do I want to continue Thank you anyway sis. BUT:
Trust me I've been in a situation where I listen to that song and think yes, I should definitely give it another shot.
Then I remember I'm no Beyonce, no J. Lo, no Rihanna.
If he wants to be with you, he'll come back.
Thank you, babe. I guess It hit me like a truck now, since I literally didn't have time back then to be devastated... I was in bed like for two days, and continued like nothing happened after that. But now... with all these stupid hollydays and cakes and food and drinks and romantic movies on TV... ugh...
But seriously, boys don't like to be straightforward and honest with their feelings. If he wants to be with you, you would know. I know that you like him and I get being stuck in your feelings, but he doesn't sound like he's the best for you. People shouldn't go days without talking to someone they supposedly care about, unless it's a serious situation going on in their personal life which is an exception.
Don't invest in him fully. He's already shown you that he's perfectly comfortable stringing you along. You will not have any kind of security with him anytime soon so don't lose out on other chances while you grow old alone.
The thing is, he said he wanted to be with you, but you're the one who said you weren't sure about it so maybe that's the reason he hasn't called, maybe he thinks you decided to move on.
If you want to be with him, then don't lose your time waiting for a call, 'cause maybe he's waiting for the same thing and the both of you are just wasting your time together right now.
At least he bothered to reply back to you after you shared your feelings with him. But if I were you, I would be skeptical. I've been in a similar position before where the guy I was with would always be apologetic and courteous only when he needed company, but when he's occupied with his own things, he doesn't bother making the effort to talk to me.
I know your situation is different though, but I just have an impression he might be like that. It's better not to keep holding onto him if he isn't willing to give back the same effort you do to trying to keep in contact.
But seriously, boys don't like to be straightforward and honest with their feelings. If he wants to be with you, you would know. I know that you like him and I get being stuck in your feelings, but he doesn't sound like he's the best for you. People shouldn't go days without talking to someone they supposedly care about, unless it's a serious situation going on in their personal life which is an exception.
I know... I'm super straightforward and you always know WHATS THE DEAL if you are with me. I hate choking ma feelings. I always say. I live for the moment and present. For the other part of your post, I agree too. Thank you.
Quote:
Originally posted by Eternium
Don't invest in him fully. He's already shown you that he's perfectly comfortable stringing you along. You will not have any kind of security with him anytime soon so don't lose out on other chances while you grow old alone.
The thing is, he said he wanted to be with you, but you're the one who said you weren't sure about it so maybe that's the reason he hasn't called, maybe he thinks you decided to move on.
If you want to be with him, then don't lose your time waiting for a call, 'cause maybe he's waiting for the same thing and the both of you are just wasting your time together right now.
Just send him a "hello" or something on facebook.
Quote:
Originally posted by hardbrit
YES! Because you were the one that said you didn't wanna be with him. Call him and talk it out!
You ain't dying alone!
But after that, I spent the day and night with him, again. And I called him when I got home, again I mean, wasn't it obvious that I actually still care?
You would think, as guys, we would have a better understanding of other guys' feelings; but you eventually find out that, that's not the case It seems like both of you aren't being consistent and being completely open about how you feel. It also seems like you two are the "living in the moment" type of people, with little-to-no thought about how, and when, to take another step. Maybe that's a sign that it's too early to take any drastic steps, that it's best to be nothing more than each other's seldom company; or you can be open with your feelings, face to face, see how he responds to that, words and body language; and then, decide from there.
if I were you, I would be skeptical. I've been in a similar position before where the guy I was with would always be apologetic and courteous only when he needed company, but when he's occupied with his own things, he doesn't bother making the effort to talk to me.
Quote:
Originally posted by Eternium
Don't invest in him fully. He's already shown you that he's perfectly comfortable stringing you along. You will not have any kind of security with him anytime soon so don't lose out on other chances while you grow old alone.
These posts basically said what I was trying to but failed. It doesn't mean he doesn't care for you but he certainly cares far more about himself than he does you. You'll never feel completely secure with him and that kind of doubt eats away at your self-esteem and wastes your time. Better to be single and find solace in the fact that as you can see, it isn't you - it's him.
Don't listen to people saying "But you said you weren't sure!!!!!!!" If I screwed someone over the way he kinda screwed you over, I'd be going out of my way to make sure you know I care. I wouldn't not contact you for three days.
It was just like back then 
