Member Since: 8/25/2012
Posts: 30,317
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I’m freaking Beyoncé. No one needs to defend me. I am basically God.
Besides, who are you defending me against? Taylor Swift? Beck? Might as well defend the sun against clouds
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Please stop sending us hand-crayoned drawings of me and Jay and Blue Ivy and you holding hands under a rainbow. We love you very much but you are not our baby.
Stop doing our taxes. You are an inexplicably great accountant but you really shouldn’t go to the trouble.
We gave you keys to the house in case of an emergency, not so you can come climb into bed with us. I should have brought this up much sooner but honestly I thought it would stop after you got married. It never occurred to me that Kim would also show up in PJs for “a snuggle.”
No need to call us every time you see a cool bird.
We have an extensive household staff. You do not need to come over every weekend to check our plumbing for leaks.
Just checked with Jay, he actually loves hearing about cool birds. So you can keep doing that.
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You were totally right though, obviously. Beck should have given me his Grammy.
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