Member Since: 10/28/2008
Posts: 22,771
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MESScyclopedia!!! LMAO!!! LMAO!!!
Christina
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Christina_Aguilera
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The Christina Aguilera (originally Christina Agorilla) *****-bot series are a number of robotic death machines sent back in time to destroy the human race and cut off baby boys foreskins without their consent (deserves her ****oral hood off if you ask me!). She is the world's second richest *****, behind Britney Spears, she has the world record for worlds biggest skank, but also looks like an orange, and has the same skin texture as an orange too!
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Britney
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Britney_spears
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Chris Brown the woman beating R&B artist, married Britney in the White/Black House in July 2009 but soon after that Chris Brown started to beat the **** out of her because he felt it was best. He publically said on the Jesus show on Fox that "He beat the **** out of Rhianna, now it was Britney's turn." Britney is in the middle of a divorce and plotting a revenge attack on Chris "The Womanizer" Brown!
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Beyonce
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Beyonce
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This article can’t go on much longer. But perhaps it could if it were about Beyoncé Knowles, because she is quite famous and has done a lot of stuff. Writing about a person with an interesting life makes for much better page filler, but this article is not one of such. Good-bye.
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Avril
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Avril_Lavigne
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Avril has concluded that the appropriate way to rid herself of paparazzi is to spit at them. Unfortunately most paparazzi are French, and as the French treat being spat at as formal gesture of friendship, they fail to understand the message.
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Madonna
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Madonna
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The Madonna is a mysterious, immortal, almighty, demon-like creature that is believed by some to be the reason why God hates humanity. While nobody knows the true name of this being, it was called Madonna by United Nations and considered to be a woman. Madonna was, as a child, given the power to never age. Coincidentally, she can never die and has been alive for billions of years since the fateful times of Jesus. She is also immune to nuclear radiation; because of this, scientists believe that if a nuclear holocaust were to occur, all that would be left is Madonna herself and cockroaches. Madonna would then infect the cockroaches with STD's and masturbate all day. Her full life's accomplishments are as follows.
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Janet
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Janet_jackson
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Janet Floppita Ho Jackson is officially the least talented member of the Jackson family according to the Fortune magazine. Thanks to family connections, her father abuses and her nipples she made it big into the music business, not without first releasing 2 flop albums that their fans always try to hide and attribute to Latoya Jackson.
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Rihanna
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Rihanna
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Rihanna Anna Anna A A A is an R&B ("Rubbish & Bollocks") is primarily best known for her forehead. Rihanna's Forehead suffers gigantipithicus, a genetic disorder in one of 7 billion newborns. Her gigantic forehead has it's own sole properties, explained in its own article. She is second best known for her stuttering abilities in her singles track Umbrella. She also has had more than 70 number one songs and is also known solely for being a darkie who has gotten the **** beaten out of her by her boyfriend (like the rest of them). Facially resembling a giant, startled Easter Egg, she is singlehandedly responsible for irritating the **** out of every person in the entire world with her single "Umbrella", which temporarily became a pop culture sensation among chavs and teen mothers everywhere. She is also responsible for having the most copied haircut of 2007, In Rihanna's latest concert in Sydney, Australia. Rihanna was seen tumbling to her death. She still performed at her funeral, however, much to the delight of her fans, saying "I'm not getting knocked off the billboard by that Gaga bitch."
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Mariah
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Mariah_Carey
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The KFC connection
After her marriage to Tommy Mottola failed, Mariah turned from men to getting her lust from KFC. As a result, her career began to suffer as albums such as "KFC=MC2" and "The Explosion of Moo Moo" peaked at #197 on Billboard. Moo Moo being an alter ego Mariah created after she turned into the size of a sphere after a mass binging that involved the eating of Aretha Franklin.
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Lady Gaga
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Lady_gaga
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Ms. Lady Gaga, also known as Lady Goo Goo or Lady DaDa, (real name Stefani [as in Gwen]) Joanne Mussolino Angelina Germanotta Ricotta Vito Andolini Corleone Lamborghina La Nina Granada Wo-landa Jenoland Himo XV), is an androgynous, oddball, bint, aged somewhere between 8 and 45. The gender is probably female despite contrary belief. Gaga is known for her outrageous style, it kicks everyone elses styles ass and it brings all the boys to the yard. Her two sisters are Lady Sovereign and Lady Hawke who make equally catchy music to Lady GaGa.
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